Justoshji,
I have been actually thinking about this topic quite a lot recently, I have come to the conclusion that lust itself, regardless that some may find it acceptable in a marriage, is an extremely dangerous thing to play with. It is like a burning fire, and once it is alight, consumes all in its hunger for more. Marriages should be founded on love, not lust. The act of making love is possibly the closest to union that human beings can experience, the act of lustful sex is more about wanting than needing, one can need the closeness of another human being, in order to feel whole, or part of a union, but one can only ever want lust.
I am at present intending to eradicate lust from my relationship with my wife for a month, just to see what differences it makes, it is already changing me as a person, I am more interested in her as a person, rather than her as a sex object, when I think about her during the day, my thoughts are innocent and constructive, rather than lustful and destructive, what can I do to make her happy, would she prefer to come home after a hard days nursing to a cooked meal and a tidy house, and a walked dog, or would she prefer me in a curry stained vest with a leer on my face.
I think if more men attempted to eradicate lust in their marriage, there would be better communication, more closeness, more compatibility, more honesty.
Of course I am a man, and human, and I am designed to respond to lust, so, on occasion, We can be lustful, provided it is a place where we both are, not just me, but it does not have to be a daily battle, the problem with lust is it is consuming, all consuming, in my view it must be understood and made peace with and even in a marriage, moderated.
