Sikh Girl Wanting To Marry White Guy

[Thewindandthesunshine]

Doesn't Sikhi teach that all people should be treated equally? Thus while I see this potential marriage clashes with Indian tradition, it absolutely doesn't with Sikhi, especially given the man is keen to learn and be involved in Sikhi. This will be very hard, but I would say once you have been with this chap for a couple more years and are sure about marriage (I.e. you still adore each other), then the only right thing to do is to stand up to your parents.

I don't have parents like that regarding partners, but I know whenever I haven't had the courage to stand up to them about other things and done what I know is right, it has ultimately been to the detriment of *everyone*. And a real Sikh is truly brave, I think.

Thankfully you live in a country where this should cause no problem beyond your immediate family, and, if they truly love you, your family will not disown you and will see your viewpoint eventually.

I know a Muslim Pakistani girl who went through almost thing, and she more or less had to flee Pakistan - at least that shouldn't be the case for you. She has no regrets though, is a lovely person, and has a happy loving family in Sweden.

Even if it is very tough for many years, remember that your bravery will serve to blaze a path to allow others in your situation in the future to be happy.

 

[Harkiran Kaur]

This Above... AND... Sikhism is not a colour. Sikh girl white guy that sounds same as Christian girl black boy. Well a black boy could very well be Christian.

Caucasians can also follow Sikhism. You do not need ot be adopted into a family raised as Sikh in order to be considered one!

 

[Harry Haller]

Doesn't Sikhi teach that all people should be treated equally? Thus while I see this potential marriage clashes with Indian tradition, it absolutely doesn't with Sikhi, especially given the man is keen to learn and be involved in Sikhi. This will be very hard, but I would say once you have been with this chap for a couple more years and are sure about marriage (I.e. you still adore each other), then the only right thing to do is to stand up to your parents.

I don't have parents like that regarding partners, but I know whenever I haven't had the courage to stand up to them about other things and done what I know is right, it has ultimately been to the detriment of *everyone*. And a real Sikh is truly brave, I think.

Thankfully you live in a country where this should cause no problem beyond your immediate family, and, if they truly love you, your family will not disown you and will see your viewpoint eventually.

I know a Muslim Pakistani girl who went through almost thing, and she more or less had to flee Pakistan - at least that shouldn't be the case for you. She has no regrets though, is a lovely person, and has a happy loving family in Sweden.

Even if it is very tough for many years, remember that your bravery will serve to blaze a path to allow others in your situation in the future to be happy.

The last time I looked this was still a Sikh forum, people will do many things for love, I know, I used to be one of them, I do not think that the love of a woman is a good enough reason to convert to Sikhism, I do not think this is about being brave or true, I think the parents realise that people make strange decisions when in love and are trying to protect their daughter from ruining her life, the problem with this sort of romeo and juliet love is that it does not last, it has no foundation, no responsibility, it is in fact, childish love, focusing on the physical and mental feel good factors, and not taking into account reality, because once reality kicks in, you have to either deal with reality, or take your own life in a dramatic fashion, I believe most romantics take the second option on account that it is easier.....

 

[Harry Haller]

This Above... AND... Sikhism is not a colour. Sikh girl white guy that sounds same as Christian girl black boy. Well a black boy could very well be Christian.

Caucasians can also follow Sikhism. You do not need ot be adopted into a family raised as Sikh in order to be considered one!

Absolutely, in fact many so called Sikhs that have been raised as Sikh know little about their own religion! They may as well be atheists!

 

[anon]

I one day asked someone who is about 40 years old whom I hold in high esteem whether arranged marriages work better or love marriages . He told me that look in West it is only love which is the primary condition as a result more than 60% of marriages end in divorces children of such marriages grow up in an abnormal atmosphere which makes them furthur vunerable in terms of handling marriage pressures . So a vicious cycle goes on & this black hole keeps increasing . Whereas in Indian marriages it is the bonding of two families which try to keep the marriage going hence more sucessful family lives & marriages . BTW I have a very good article on Sikh Marriage called Anand Karaj ( The ceremony of Eternal Bliss ) I suggest star1119 to give it a look .
http://dalbirk.blogspot.com/2010/01/anand-karaj.html
BTW I am not against the marriage of two Sikhs ( ie if he certainly has adopted Sikhi from the core of his heart )

One day I asked a guy who was about 50 and he said Love marriages are better.

 

[Harry Haller]

well I am 46 and just coming out of my fifth long term relationship that was love based, now I am asking my mum to arrange my marriage next time

 

[Parma]

All I can say is that politics and finance has a lot to do with these types of situations these days. I wouldn't mind a mixed relationship myself a decent lady, but it would be a new direction. For both of you the foundations upon which you stand may not support you so it becomes a couple against the world type of scenario can be quite nice but I guess it depends on how solid two individuals are and how solid they are together as well. In some cases it can be beneficial as you expand you're families establishment and horizons. Totally depends on the families or couple. No boundaries. There maybe issues on ceremonies but just keep everyone happy an do you're own thing in the end. You would have to create your own brand of policy. True Love conquers all.

 

[Harry Haller]

True Love conquers all.

what is true love?

is it love that is blind to everything? is it intelligent love? is it love that is rational? In books we call such people romantics, in real life we call them fools

 

[Parma]

what is true love?

is it love that is blind to everything? is it intelligent love? is it love that is rational? In books we call such people romantics, in real life we call them fools

I wouldn't say that it's a foolish emotion without love some angry people would probably kill there own kids or who knows what else so it seems like a kind of sensible emotion to me in bringing people into civilized thoughts moving on from sensitive issues. It's transparent just like asking what's sadness the opposite of happiness it's a feeling of expression. The rest I leave for you and the Oxford dictionary with the help from the GGS and the cosmos and nature for yourself to figure out. Certain things are best left for individuals to figure out for themselves. Other then that none of my business if you require a certificate or something equally human orientated go and ask a lady. I did an she taught me nice things but you have to be wise she didn't understand one simple thing you don't conquer what you already are the spirit of the devine. Shame when you find a lady you love you tend to put the one you love on a pedastal they normally just ruin it they don't understand the value of true love. That's the hardest part of the soul realising that connection I cant answer this question myself really I think the one you end up you shouldn't feel privileged as its just destiny. You just treat each other with the greatest integrity always thought I would have got married in the UK I was quite popular but i got married abroad and it didn't work out. Don't know where life takes you really apart from the economic factors involved an how much things are on lock down the rest is just destiny. All the best dude.

 

[Harry Haller]

I wouldn't say that it's a foolish emotion without love some angry people would probably kill there own kids so it seems like a kind of sensible emotion to me in bringing people into civilized thoughts moving on from sensitive issues.

In our culture, its love, not anger, that make some people kill their own kids.......

personally I think I would rather be killed an someone angry with me than someone who loved me!

 

[Parma]

In our culture, its love, not anger, that make some people kill their own kids.......

personally I think I would rather be killed an someone angry with me than someone who loved me!

Why would you kill your own kids if you love them? In whose culture? Why would you kill an innocent child or adult for that matter? I know governments have alot to answer for but that's why we live in democratic societies to hold them to account. Even in medieval India when kings where percived as barbaric they could only act so far before there own Kingdom's collapsed. The mughal dynasty being one type of example where administrations didn't work in the favour of its citizens from Sikhism perspective.


Same here I would rather understand the importance of a individuals thoughts and acknowledgement of there bad intentions towards me to figure out the reason for a update on someone actions involved in trying to take a life. If you are going to take part in a stupid activity the least you can do is explain yourself rather than just because I like wanted too kill you as a hobby most stupid explanation. I think its unfair and cowardly and the individual may require some psychological help who would be dishing out such silly unauthorised punishment. I hope you are okay the strangest conversation.

 

[Harry Haller]

Why would you kill your own kids if you love them?

to save them from bringing shame to the family?
because they are about to make a big mistake and killing them is the only way to stop it?

both reasons of love, and both very popular in our community

 

[Parma]

to save them from bringing shame to the family?
because they are about to make a big mistake and killing them is the only way to stop it?

both reasons of love, and both very popular in our community

Go ahead and get councilling sorry but you need to sort out your issues. I don't know which community you are talking about but living in the UK is still lawful. I guess to a point that is apart of what love is understanding somebody realising there troubled story and being able to accept them and love them for who they are an not what you wish them to be but that is like any relevant relationship between humans built up with confidence truth and trust. How many people are totally at one with there other half an peaceful. Your own history.

 

[Parma]

I guess in life it has tought me to be a careful thinker although at times I do personally still act on impulse that is human nature and without explainable reasons it seems to be from nature at times we act as a human species we still adopt the same survival responses of creative designed creatures that's why we are given knowledge to share it to lesson the risk and rise of conflict which is burdensome thoughts an helps you to ensure you gain a surviving relationship mechanism intended for human survival. Thoughtful living or as in the Guru Granth Sahib it gives intentions on honest living. I guess we can all be a bit shrewd (she rude lol) at times. All the best.

 

[Harry Haller]

Go ahead and get councilling sorry but you need to sort out your issues. I

apologies, allow me to be succinct, I am talking about mercy killings,