Re: O S with partner
Veer Manjeet Singh jee,
I would attempt to answer your question within the sikh perspective of what all I have experienced/understood during my life.
First of all, I am equally attracted to the various kind of pleasures in life. Some pleasures attract me with greater intensty and some with little lesser.
Now coming to your question, whether Oral sex is allowed in sikhism or not, the simple answer would be that the Guru Sahibs had left a very clear answer to this.
1> First under the purpose of human life :-
a> Why we got this life in the first place?
b> After providing the answer to the first question, they go on telling us
how to achieve the objective of this human life.
c> And the rest of gurbani explains about the problems we face while trying to
achieve the objective of our human life.
d> Then Guru Sahib gives us the principle techniques to overcome these
problems so that we donot fail in our objective.
The answer to your questions lies in the "Guru ka Bhaana Mann'na"
Bhaana = Bhaa jaanaa
Mann'na = Mann Laina
Guru nu jo Bhaavnda hai , uss gall nu mann laina, hee sikh da dharam.
We normally take the Bhaana in a negative sense, as if something wrong has happnened, and since we can't do any thing about it, so we should agree to it positively by the act of Bhaana Mann'na.
This is a wrong thought because neither the God nor the Guru do anything wrong, so the bhaana mann'na is obeying the Guru's liking( hukam in other words)
Your dilemma originates from the fact that some state of mind draws you near the feeling that temptation of oral sex and hence the mind deviates. The situation becomes worse when this activity is wrapped in the package of ultimate pleasures.
This is done by those who are man-mukh i.e self-oriented where as the Gurmukhs (the Guru-oriented one's) would simply say that you may get the momentary pleasure from this but you will not achieve the eternal bliss through this.
Since we have never experienced this eternal bliss earlier its difficult for us to buy their argument and the physical pleasure are the one's which we have relished earlier.
So the Gurmukh argument does-not enter our brain easily.
This is the only reason our Guru Sahibaan have suggested that we should try to find the sadh-sangat and join them. Only the company of the Guru-oriented would drive our thoughts in the right direction.
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For a short answer, Gurbani has a message of Sanjam and Santokh and these are limits of do's and don'ts.
The pupose of sex is very clear, its reproduction, and since nobody would done it as responsibility, God attached pleasure to its very nature so that two individuals could be attracted to it.
The effort of human being is understanding this reality and get away with illusionary pleasure.
