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Marrying A Nonsikh

ge77inhigh

SPNer
Apr 12, 2007
9
5
i got my answers

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semicharmed

SPNer
Jan 15, 2007
13
0
I was just wondering why your English is so bad? Were you born and raised in the U.S? And what does it matter if you're a 'sexual' person? you go on about loving a 'person' and then list the different types of women you have dated (at 19!) and have the audacity to go on about how you're a lover of 'the person' pahleeeeze!
 

Michaela19

SPNer
Mar 26, 2007
3
0
31
Barnsley
I dont really know how to work this forum but ill have a go...

My boyfriend is a sikh, his mum knows about us being together and is ok with it as i have known his family for years. His dad doesnt or rather he does but wont admit to knowing and it just hurts to know that hes ignoring the whole situation... I wish he would just either tell us hes ok with it or just go absolutly mad... Either way we would know his feelings about us being together.

Just wondered if anyone else has been through the same thing or similar... Its just hard to talk to my boyfriend about it all.

Thanks

Michaela:)
 

truthseeker

SPNer
Aug 12, 2004
158
8
15
Ontario, Canada
Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh

ge77inhigh ji,
Firstly, yes if you are a sikh, marrying a sikh would be the ideal. Its hard to raise children and instil them with values if the parents are from different religions.
Secondly, being born into a sikh family does not make you automatically sikh. You are a sikh because you love your Guru, you love his teachings.
If you arent a sikh ( as per what i said above) then why should you be obligated to marry someone how is a sikh? But keep yourself open because you may just meet a sikh girl just as you are.

And to Michaela ji,
i think that its just hard for indian parents to accept that their children may not be completely up for marrying an indian. Personally, my mother married a non-indian and my grandmother was not happy about it at all. If your relationship gets more serious then you guys are gonna have to talk to his father about it.. there no getting around it you know?

Im still young and dont know much about this type of stuff, but no one really posted anything so i thought id give my 2 cents. I hope it helped
Bhull Chuk Maaf Karni ji

Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh
 

ge77inhigh

SPNer
Apr 12, 2007
9
5
i guess....i am not a true Sikh or a sikh... i think its either you are one or you not there aren't real side ways...plus i moved out....so i got my own things going on...so not listening to no one...and i was trying to become a true sikh while back but couldn't walk the straight line....so i gave up on it..thing bout my english....well school wasn't my thing.....well i find couple of pills of ecstasy more help full than gurugrath sabib.....sorry if i offended someone........
 

Vikram singh

SPNer
Feb 25, 2005
455
418
"SIKH Religion is like a boundless ocean teeming with priceless gems. The deeper you dive the more treasures you find." but you have to dive to get the priceless gems ,without diving it you can't get anything,


I hope you got the answer
 

Randip Singh

Writer
Historian
SPNer
May 25, 2005
2,936
2,948
50
United Kingdom
well born in to sikhism....live in usa.... i bout 19 sort of a student......i have cut hairs....n can't ever remember having long hairs.....my dad is kinda small business man n religious....everytime i see him he tells me to listen to gurbani....which i never did , even if i was able to understand it........ well something that bothered me was that....he siad i should marry a sikh girl when ever i want to get married.....i was like {censored}? SO my question is that if your a sikh you have to marry a sikh? i mean i never dated a desi girl.......all the girls i ever went out were white, spanish, asian, black n ect........i am sexual person....had lots of sexual relationships......so am i a sinner?.....if i ever get married, i wann marry the person i love.....not because of religion....am i wrong.....i don't belive in having uncutt hairs, i don't really belive in the 5 k's.... n i almost agree with everything else....judging from my name yes i did do drugs n drink alchol...is that a sin?


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Like the Jedi :wink:.........Sikhism talks about the 5 thieves that steal your ability to tune into God......:

Kaam = Obsession with Sex
Krodh = Anger or Stuborness
Moh = Materialism
Lobh = Greed
Hankaar = Egotism or Obsesion with self.

The question you have to ask yourself do you suffer from one or more of these maladies........

As for drugs......used be loads of people who have tried them all around me.....might shock some people here ....but so have I (hemp drink).......all it did was detach me from reality and prevent me from facing my responsibilties and life. A lot of my friends dropped "e"'s , snorted coke etc......one is dead and the rest suffer from mental problems and have had real problems in personal lives.

A Sikh never shirks or hides from life.....a Sikh keeps his mind and body in tip top condition.....a Sikh has no need for such distractions.

from what you are saying....you seemed to be obsessed with sex (that tends to distract people from what is going on round them)......you take drugs....that not only stops one facing reality but injures the body.......

You can answer your own question my friend....

PS In my eyes a Sikh is not about long hair....it is about actual conduct.

Also to answer your question on marrying a non-Sikh.....the Sikh code of conduct states a Sikh must only marry a Sikh....now in my eyes if that person is making a conscious effort to conquer the 5 thieves regardless of race, religion etc then they are a Sikh.......
 

RRSINGH

SPNer
Feb 12, 2009
10
13
Randip Singh has answered the question by (ge77inhigh) very balancedly, aptly and intellegently. Our guardians, parents and the gurus can show us the path...but ultimately it is in us to walk on the shown path by continuosly being humanly above kaam, krodh, lobh, moh, ahnakar. Dear Ge77, nodody is judging you. You have been very upfront about expressing your thoughts. People who responded to your questions and musings have been very kind to tell you what they know from their experience and otherwise. Ultimately, the light has to come from within. If you think the light is what your expressed thoughts are....then ...may the peace and hapiness be with you. May Waheguru bless us the way we are!
 

Rani Sandhu

SPNer
Feb 8, 2009
34
21
Toronto
Well answered Randip Singh Ji:)

But my question is: how does one overcome Short-temper, Sturborness....well there are courses offered on anger management, yoga...
....any suggestions that you could offer?

Thanks
Rani:)
 

Rani Sandhu

SPNer
Feb 8, 2009
34
21
Toronto
Michaela Ji,

Your BF's dad probably knows that you guys are together but maybe he doesn't want to express it.......its hard for parents accept it....b/c maybe he is scared that if you two end up marrying together...since you both don't share the same beliefs...your kids might be confused in terms of which path to lead....but then again as Randip Ji pointed out just b/c we are born into a Sikh family doesn't make us true sikhs....b/c a true sikh is the " making a conscious effort to conquer the 5 thieves regardless of race, religion etc then they are a Sikh......."
 

Tejwant Singh

Mentor
Writer
SPNer
Jun 30, 2004
5,029
7,158
Henderson, NV.
Well answered Randip Singh Ji:)

But my question is: how does one overcome Short-temper, Sturborness....well there are courses offered on anger management, yoga...
....any suggestions that you could offer?

Thanks
Rani:)
Rani ji

Guru Fateh.

Allow me to add my 2 cent worth.

Physical excercise like running would be the best. It gives one the chance to think wile running. I used to run marathons and long distance runninig daily helped me cop with my demons and all the negative that accumulates within like a muck. Working out in a gym may not be bad either, but for me feeling the fresh air and the soiltude helped me a lot.

Regards

Tejwant Singh
 

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