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simpy

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By the way Kanwardeep Singh Ji...........you are a member of this forum... And I am sure nobody here stops you from glorifying the achievements of clean shaven Sikh men.... I am 100% sure. are they stopping you????????
 

Tejwant Singh

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Narayanjot ji and Mai ji,

With your permission may I add that Kaur Power only for those who stand up, own up and want to be counted as Kaurs. As kanwardeep ji had pointed out earlier, this tribe is rapidly depleting!

Harbans ji,

Guru Fateh.

I beg to differ with you what you mentioned above. Actually it is the opposite. Kaurs who are not able to stand up on their own need real help, others are capable of helping themselves. History is its proof. When the women and girls were kidnapped from the Hindu families by the Mughals, of not any fault of their own, were saved by the brave Sikhs who followed the teachings of the Gurus.

Our Gurus sacrificed their lives for the down trodden. They gave us the name, the Peace Warriors for that only reason, to protect and uplift those who are not capable of doing that by themselves.

In closing, I would like to say that it our duty as we men are self proclaimed machos of Sikhi to give women a hand and uplift them as our equals, not in just words but in deeds because we all come from a woman. Gurbani tells us that.

Regards

Tejwant Singh
 

spnadmin

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simpy ji and Tejwant ji

I agree with you and am so grateful that you have expressed these ideas. Our big challenge right now is to figure out how to achieve access to those women who lack confidence and skills. How do we reach out to them on the Internet? Many of them are so overwhelmed in their lives and so barricaded from communication with other ways of living that they may not be aware of this effort. Let's keep on with the goal of pulling together for them.
 

kds1980

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Thanks for the argument.


In my humble opinion-- If that is the case.... Women I am talking about need way much more help than clean shaven achievers. I mean these achievers had some support/knowledge/courage/// to do something--(you need all these qualities and oppurtunities to become an achiever of some kind/any kind)........... Then these women who are lacking all these qualities and oppurtunities--Need Extra Extra Help......... Thanks

And as a True Sikh-- one doesn't limit himself/herslf to just Sikh or sehajdhari or any other class-- A true Sikh does it for the humanity at large. Thanks again.
Surinder kaur ji

I think you have misinterpretted my post nowhere i said that women that need help should not be helped if they are not practicising kaurs.The only discussion is taking place is here is about portrayal.The women that need help should be helped whether are practising kaurs,Non practising or even non sikhs
 

kds1980

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By the way Kanwardeep Singh Ji...........you are a member of this forum... And I am sure nobody here stops you from glorifying the achievements of clean shaven Sikh men.... I am 100% sure. are they stopping you????????
The question is not about me Its about entire sikh community how they take it.Let me show you an example

From Rags to Riches | The Langar Hall

The above is a story of a sikh man who is very successful in business man
but he has abandoned his sikh identity and you can easily judge the reaction of sikh community by reading the majority of comments
 

Mai Harinder Kaur

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I read and wrote my comment there. It might surprise those of you who know me. I know it surprised me.

My first reaction is sadness and anger. Is this what our shaheeds died for? Members of my immediate family achieved shaheedi in Delhi 1984; they could have survived had they shed their "visible Sikh" identity.

But looking beyond anger, I realise that some people are stronger than others. Being different, being picked on and bullied year after year takes its toll. As Sikhs, we are called upon to be strong and courageous. Some are and some are not. Seeing this young man with a dirty-shaved face and shorn hair makes me sad, but I feel I have no right to judge him.

Now, had he been a Khalsa, my statement would be completely different. Khalsa are called upon to be more...
 

simpy

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The question is not about me Its about entire sikh community how they take it.Let me show you an example

From Rags to Riches | The Langar Hall

The above is a story of a sikh man who is very successful in business man
but he has abandoned his sikh identity and you can easily judge the reaction of sikh community by reading the majority of comments
Thanks for the reply Kanwardeep Singh Ji..

There are many cases like this-- not just a Sikh..can be a black, a jews,...many we can disscuss... but does it tell us that we should avoid all those women who need help????? just because some people think this way........

By reading those negative comments it shows how narrow minded all those people are....I dont consider them true Sikhs.....Where in Guru Granth sahib Guru Ji is telling us to be tip top with the outer identity.. no where... A True Sikh sees Guru Ji's face in every face... shaved head or grown hair-- nothing adds to any Spiritual advancement.....

i dont see anything wrong in that boy.. and this kind of narrow mindedness which they are showing can only change if we stop classifying people based on outer identity...

anybody's outer identity is of no importance .. is it????
after knowing that someone is living a life like hell in my vicinity-- i have to think a way to get him/her out of that situation.. doesn't matter what it takes... Nothing should stop us from helping such people...

About Glorifying other people -- if some has a problem-- let them have it..........it cannot decrease the greatness of ones hardwork and success....only person at loss is the nindak...no one else...
 
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Simpy ji, Tejwant ji and Narayanjot ji,

It is good that you are talking underprivileged women needing a helping hand. There can be no disagreement on that.

But I was talking about a different set of privileged women who were erstwhile Kaurs and have now chosen to drop the suffix (because it is less fashionable?). These women advertise in Matrimonial columns in India as "....wanted a clean shaven, turban less Sikh boy for a highly educated broadminded Sikh girl......." and this trend is growing at an alarming rate. They cannot be part of any Kaur power whatsoever.
 

simpy

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Mar 28, 2006
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Simpy ji, Tejwant ji and Narayanjot ji,

It is good that you are talking underprivileged women needing a helping hand. There can be no disagreement on that.

But I was talking about a different set of privileged women who were erstwhile Kaurs and have now chosen to drop the suffix (because it is less fashionable?). These women advertise in Matrimonial columns in India as "....wanted a clean shaven, turban less Sikh boy for a highly educated broadminded Sikh girl......." and this trend is growing at an alarming rate. They cannot be part of any Kaur power whatsoever.
Harbansj24 ji,

in my humble opinion no practice makes a woman less of a human.. if one is in trouble and need help.. must be provided with the same manner-- Sikh/non-Sikh/other/// irrespective of her choices
These and any other type of Classifications are a selfish brain work...it is not a pure heart's desire..
Humanatarian work is not done just by brain-- heart is fully involved too.. and a pure heart doesn't look for--white/black/sikh/muslim/a sikh girl not having kaur as last name/a sikh girl with hair cut/a sikh girl looking for a clean shaven partner//// a pure heart see Guru's face in every face...

regarding the girls from sikh families looking for cleanshaven guys---- have you ever thought --why they desire so?? and have you tried to help them get over this classification... if you did.. what problems did you face in the process of winning their heart??? Please share.... beacuse this can help a lot the Sikh boys and girls as well as their parents...

A few questions for all the Sangat---

Why do you think girls born in Sikh families dont want 'kaur' in their name??
Why are the girls born in sikh families looking for clean-shaven partners??
Why are we unable to convince girls born in Sikh families marry turbaned Sikhs??
Why girls born in Sikh families cut their hair??
 

simpy

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Mar 28, 2006
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Kaur power should be used to help people considering them humans first-- in my humble opinion
And if we keep this power resreved for a certain set of women--- we are not even close to be considered our Guru Ji's followers..............


Guru Ji is telling us--
Ek Pita Ekas Ke Hum Barik.....
Sabh Jot Teri JagJeevana.....
Jo Jo deesay tera roop........
 
Feb 19, 2007
494
888
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Delhi India
regarding the girls from sikh families looking for cleanshaven guys---- have you ever thought --why they desire so?? and have you tried to help them get over this classification... if you did.. what problems did you face in the process of winning their heart??? Please share.... beacuse this can help a lot the Sikh boys and girls as well as their parents...

A few questions for all the Sangat---

Why do you think girls born in Sikh families dont want 'kaur' in their name??
Why are the girls born in sikh families looking for clean-shaven partners??
Why are we unable to convince girls born in Sikh families marry turbaned Sikhs??
Why girls born in Sikh families cut their hair?
?


Simpy ji,

Before the explanations to your questions can be attempted, lets understand that the term "Kaur Power" is understood to be referring to women having a surname Kaur and by virtue of that empowering themselves to great deeds. Did not Dasam Pita make Singhs so that they are different from other people. While empowering Singhs to do good for the mankind irrespective whether they were Singhs or not, he did have harsh things to say for "Patits" or apostates. Similarly Kaurs are empowered to do good without discrimination but what to say of those who choose to surrender their priviledge?

Now comming to your questions. There cannot be any single answer.
Many girls do not want kaur in their name because by superficial education, they associate with a religious practice and religions are on the decline anyway throughout the world and so thet have no use for them.

Similary they do not find any use in their partners keeping kesh, because then they look different and retrograde and not upwardly mobile. They also consider, keeping kesh as a restriction on their freedom of expression and creativity! For example people aspiring to become actors or actresses!

Answers to the next questions can be in answers to the previous questions.

Some smart people always come up with the standard and oft heard question "I fully respect SGGS. But where is it given that Sikhs have to keep kesh?" Or where is the evidence that Guru Gobind Singh ji ordained us to to keep 5ks?

Comming to your question that do many of try to counsel. Obvously many of us do try to counsel only persons whom we may be familiar with. Sometimes we are successful and sometimes not. Most of times the answers we get are on lines given above.
 

simpy

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Mar 28, 2006
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?


Simpy ji,

Before the explanations to your questions can be attempted, lets understand that the term "Kaur Power" is understood to be referring to women having a surname Kaur and by virtue of that empowering themselves to great deeds. Did not Dasam Pita make Singhs so that they are different from other people. While empowering Singhs to do good for the mankind irrespective whether they were Singhs or not, he did have harsh things to say for "Patits" or apostates. Similarly Kaurs are empowered to do good without discrimination but what to say of those who choose to surrender their priviledge?...........
harbansj24 ji,

Thanks for the reply...

In my humble opinion--First of all one doesn't become a 'Sikh' by taking birth in a Sikh family.. Dasam Pita made Singhs not because he wanted them to appear different.. He made them to help and serve the whole humanity and be humble at the same time.. A sikh or singh whatever you call-- is supposed to follow Guru Ji become His servant and stay humble at the same time .. So is for kaur.. Being humble does not mean to appear different.. or dealing different people differently based on their religion or way of life..

Guru Ji Himself taught us by example through 10 human lives-- and has given the whole humanity a treasure -- the written Word.. So the whole complete lesson theory alongwith practical.............Any human can learn it and live it--- He has posed no restrictions on any human...

Basic Human Nature-- we learn from our own experiences and other human examples around us. We follow what makes us feel good and protected...

I think that we-the socalled Sikh community- are unable to convince these girls and boys the significance of outer appearance and the inner quest........... There is not much out there to make them feel good about all that... They seldom see people whose outer appearance match their deeds........... They are not at fault, they are what their families and the society made them...

So if we want positive response we need to take them in confidence, shouldn't ignore them.
We should become good examples so that they follow our footsteps.
First we need to become good enough and then We should walk together taking them along so that they can see the goodness in us and get impressed enough to follow....
By distancing from them we will only create more distance--in my humble opinion.....

What is the use of name-- kaur or singh-- If you are not one?????
What is the use of outer appearance if thoughts and deeds dont match it?????

In my humble opinion--
First become a Kaur then add kaur to your name
First become a Singh then add Singh to your name
First become a Sikh-- outer apperance is going to follow itself, it will just happen...

:up:
 

simpy

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Mar 28, 2006
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Here is a list that I put together after analyzing the posts where suggestions were made. I do not recommend ranking them for this reason. Some of these items may not seem as important as others. But they are more manageable as first steps toward a larger goal. They can can be addressed more quickly, and will have a cummulative effect if implemented as a group of issues. And we don't want to lose momentum. Tackling something huge like stopping men from beating their wives is very difficult to effect immediately. But beginning the process of educating women and men is something we can do right away.


  • Advocate for participation of women at all levels of Gurdwara seva, including performance of kirtan at Harimandir Sahib
  • Become advocates for changing laws that are ineffective, fostering new laws when they are needed, and enforcing existing laws when they are not being enforced
  • Become an online portal for women and men where they have access to webinars, articles, and other information that raises awareness of abuse and discrimination against women
  • Become an online portal where women and families can gain access to information about services and advocacy
  • Campaign against female foeticide
  • Change negative attitudes about women who excel in work, at school, in settings outside the home
  • Educate women about their status, helping them understand that they themselves are not aware that they are in a bad situation; Build their confidence to seek help and raise their awareness of how to get the services they need
  • Educate women and men to recognize abuse at home and in relationships by sharing stories, case studies, videos, and articles that bring them to understand that there are other ways of relating that are positive
  • Encourage women and girls to learn self-defense skills (e.g., Gatka) to protect themselves but also to build their self-esteem
  • Help women understand that they in no way “caused” or are responsible for physical abuse, but that they are the victims of another’s uncontrollable anger
  • Disseminate information about bullying
  • Raise awareness of community protective services that are available, and foster confidence in women who are being abused to use these services
  • Raise awareness that being abused is not shameful
  • Teach newly-weds the signs and symptoms of abusive relationships
Now I think the next step is to take each idea and brainstorm 2 or 3 or more strategies that we can put into action with our current resources. This is how we build sustainability and capacity. Once we begin to see evidence of success from these early stages, we will be in a better position to convince others to provide resources so we can do more ambitious things.

Please forgive me for being so bossy.
I humbly suggest to complete this--'List Project' let us do it in a seperate thread...
the related posts should be moved there....

I think we should get productive and do the needfull.......just a suggestion to the people concerned....
 

spnadmin

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Daredevil Rupy Kaur Challenges Fellow Britons NEWS REPORTS

Daredevil Rupy Kaur Challenges Fellow Britons NEWS REPORTS


A Brooklands based daredevil is about to prove she has a head for heights - by doing a 14,500 foot skydive.

Wheelchair user, Sikh-Briton Rupy Kaur, is taking the plunge to raise funds for the anti racism organisation Searchlight and its Hope Not Hate campaign.

The move by Rupy, who is a disability activist, comes amid a recent surge in violent demonstrations by racist and anti-immigration groups in towns and cities with large non-white populations across Britain.

Rupy is particularly critical of the anti-immigration British National Party (BNP), which is the midst of a major controversy over a decision by BBC television to invite its leader to participate in a popular current affairs panel discussion show called Question Time this week.

"When I first heard of the BNP, I thought nobody would be that stupid as to vote for them. There have been many wars and nobody would want to incite hatred, would they?" Rupy says on the Hope Not Hate website.
"The sad fact is there are people who support them."

The BNP has more than 50 elected representatives in local authorities all over Britain and two in the European Parliament.

Rupy Kaur said she comes from a family of fighters for justice: her grandfather had to fight prejudice and racism as a ragman in order to become a successful businessman.

Born with cerebral palsy, Rupy Kaur started her education in a special needs school but authorities were forced to admit her to a mainstream school following a campaign by her uncle.

Although she did not have a note-taker in lessons and was considered to be a ‘health and safety hazard' - which meant she could not stay back in school without a support worker - she scored three A-grades in her 12th standard exams.

After finishing school, social services advised her to stay at home to do a ‘Learn Direct' course but her cousin helped her "battle with them in order for me to study at Manchester" - one of Britain's best universities.

"If you are proud to be British, then I believe that you should stand against fascism," said Rupy Kaur.

"This jump is a major thing for me.

"It would be awesome to know that people are supporting me and this cause so get your hands in your pockets ... by doing so you'll be making a positive difference in the world."

The 22-year-old psychology graduate will be doing a tandem skydive at Grange over Sands (United Kingdom) on December 6, 2009.

"I'll be with someone - so that person will be opening the parachute. All I have to do is scream," she joked.

The skydive will be the culmination of a long standing ambition and she decided to do it after talking to a friend who had also taken part in one.
She has received the full support of her family who will attend the event, near Morecambe.

"My family are just hoping the parachute opens. They all think I've got a screw loose," she laughed.

Rupy Kaur will receive training on the day and said she hopes her daring feat will inspire other people with disabilities to take part in extreme sports.

"Just because you're disabled, it doesn't mean you can't participate in extreme sports. Obviously, you've got to think about the pros and cons but it shouldn't hold you back," she said.

* Anyone interested in sponsoring Rupy Kaur may do so by visiting /www.hopenothate.org.uk/skydive/  

Rupy Kaur - Bio
Rupy Kaur completed her degree in Psychology at The University of Manchester, in 2008 gaining a 2:1. At university, she was founder and chairwoman of the ABLED society, which was set up to enhance disabled students' experiences at university. Following her achievements, she was elected as the Open Place Representative on the Disabled Students' Committee for the National Union of Students. Her role involves raising disability issues, including accessible transport. Rupy is also a member of SKILL, the National Bureau of Students with Disabilities. She was appointed member of the Disabled Persons' Transport Advisory Committee in July 2009. 
 

Mai Harinder Kaur

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I really appreciate what you have written, there is no other outlet, I have seen that addresses the issues that we face as mothers of Sikh children.

Gurmit Kaur Ji,

You might enjoy a poem written by Preeti Kaur ji, called where ever it is dark - a poem for Sikh children, which I think really hits the nail over the head. I have posted it in my blog, at THE ROAD TO KHALISTAN: Where Ever It Is Dark - An Illustrated Poem

Please feel free to bring up these problems. I'm sure those of us who have faced them would be relieved to share our experiences.

:ice:
 

kds1980

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Now, Sikh Women Also Guard India's Borders

Now, Sikh Women Also Guard India's Borders

by RAMANINDER K. BHATIA




Every afternoon, Sukhwinder Kaur and her mother sat down to watch the afternoon soap in their sp{censored}ly furnished Hoshiarpur home but now that seems like a memory from another lifetime.

Though Sukhwinder and the other girls in her Khasa camp have been given a TV set, they are no longer interested in all the twists and turns of the family melodrama. The 22-year-old has plenty more to keep track of these days. Part of India's Border Security Force's first female contingent of border guards, one of her main responsibilities is guarding the treacherous Indo-Pak border at Punjab's Attari, and ensuring there is no smuggling of contraband.

"It feels different to have such a huge responsibility," Sukhwinder says, brushing a speck off her crisp uniform. "Life has changed for all of us. So have the priorities and notions of fear and safety. The country is all we have time to care for."

The women took charge in September after receiving training in weapon handling, intelligence gathering, border management, unarmed combat, frisking and guard duties.

They rise at 5.30 am and, after a quick breakfast - usually rotis and subzi at the Other Ranks mess - rush to collect their weapons from the armoury . They then report for duty and are ferried to their respective posts. After an entire day of checking and frisking, they reach the Attari border checkpost in the evening to report for crowd control duty during the Beating of the Retreat ceremony. Back on campus by 7.30 pm, most are ready to hit the sack after spending a little quality time with their fellows.

"Who has the energy or interest to watch TV serials after all this?" asks Amandeep Kaur, another recruit from among the 640 women who graduated this year from the BSF's subsidiary training camp at Kharkan, Punjab, after a 36-week preparatory period.

Though they took positions at the forward post to a tumultuous welcome from society and the government, followed, of course, by a media frenzy, most are still adjusting to a rough job at the 500 km-long border. A majority of them are barely out of their teens, excited as ever to wear a new piece of jewellery or get their hands painted with henna.

The first shock came days after they began work. Four rockets fired from Pakistan landed in nearby villages, forming deep craters. Many had never seen such a thing before. There was more. Soon after the missile incident, a clutch of vernacular papers carried stories, apparently quoting a Pakistani news site, that insinuated the women had been drafted for the pleasure of the male soldiers.

The motive was all too clear, but the bullet missed its target. "Those were attempts to demoralise us," Sukhdeep Kaur says. "But they failed miserably. If they so much as try to eye our border, our guns are ready."

As she frisks women farmers queuing up at gate number 112 in Daoke village, Amritsar, Sukhdeep orders one woman to let her hair down, and asks another to take off her shoes. "We have to do this," she explains. "It is easy to hide a small phone or a SIM card and get it across the border," she adds.

The BSF has deployed women guards to improve security checks on the border, as women are being used increasingly to smuggle narcotics.

As an afterthought, Sukhdeep says, "The nearest Pakistani village, Kot Jaimal Singh, is barely a kilometre away from where we stand. You can even see farmers across the border tending to their almost-ripe crop. There is nothing to suggest these are two different countries. Even the height of the paddy on both sides is the same."

But it's not just the women who have to make adjustments. Their male counterparts too are busy getting used to women in their midst.

"The men went through a reorientation programme and were briefed before the women were inducted. They are quite mindful of the women's privacy while treating them as colleagues . Fortunately, nothing amiss has been reported till now," said Inspector General (BSF) Himmat Singh.

If there is anxiety in some quarters, there is reassurance from others. "The women are disciplined and eager to work for their country. How can we not acknowledge and respect that?" says the assistant commandant, Aman Tirkey. "They are like our daughters and sisters. And most of us, whether male or female, have come from a similar background."

Apart from the crush and grind of daily work that unites them, there is something else that all the women agree on, being the first lot of women to guard India's borders is a matter of huge pride. "I have two younger brothers, both still in school, and my father is a farmer who tills three acres of land in Mansa," says Satveer Kaur. "I still remember what my father said the first time he saw me in my uniform. He said I was the eldest son. That meant everything to me. I don't mind the arduous patrolling anymore. I come from a place where girls have traditionally been considered inferior, even killed in the womb for a male child."

Chirpy and bright, 20-year-old Rajwant Kaur from Gurdaspur insists she's got an even better compliment. A smile spreading across her pretty face, she says, "I met a child sometime ago at Raja Ka Pul village, a stone's throw from the last Indian railway station at Attari. She said she wanted to be like me, wear a uniform and carry a gun, when she grows up."

 

[Courtesy: Times of India]

October 27, 2009







 

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