Hard Talk How Many Sikhs Have Married Out Of Caste/race?

[drkhalsa]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

"No shw is Indian Sikh men Hater Feminist to be specific !

"

See....this is exactly what I'm talking about. I specifically mentioned that my comments were not meant to be offensive but I guess children must be replying to my thread. I make ONE comment about my own experience and I'm a 'feminist' lol you are just proving my point that most of Sikh men are living in their double standard dream world where if we dare speak out about ANYTHING we're painted as feminists...I'm not at all offended, I'm happy that you helped me prove my point-thanks

dear Semicharmed

i am glad to know that you got your point straight !

I regret to start converstion with such note ( as in my previous post) but I was more kind of replying to KDS1980 post just below to your firdt post

My only point was that we form opinion based on or personal experience and they are our best guide but these opinion dont stand correct always for everybody in general

So is the case with your opinion I dont believe that this is situation in general and Females are so much suffering in our sikh families in general



As i am moderator on this forum so plz believe me It was not my intention to hurt you or discouirage you in any way I apologise for my unbalanced words that created confusion


Thanks
Have a nice time on this forum

Jatinder Singh

 

[Randip Singh]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

I know this is going to sound offensive but I don't think I intend on marrying anyone Sikh let alone Indian. That doesn't mean I'm going to marry whitey but having been raised in an Indian household, seeig first hand how the men are raised on this petastol, has left a very bitter taste in my mouth about the men. I don't like the double standard, and perhaps I'll find that with other cultures but the slightest threat to my freedom turns me off...yes I've painted them all with the same brush but I'm still waiting for that 'exception' to come along and well I'm still waiting

I started this post and had this dilemma like you. Sounds like me about 20 odd years ago.

As a young turbanned Sikh male, I absolutely despised and hated Indian women. Sikh women in particular.

Reason why? They made fun of my turban. They were very shallow and did not want to know the inner.

As a result I only dated women who were not of Indian background. I found that they were interested in me as a person.

HOWEVER, I met a wonderful Sikh woman at University (albeit) from a caste.....who totally changed my views. She is now my wife of nearly 20 years and we have 2 beautiful kids.

I now realise that I had become exactly what I had despised so much..........I treated every Indian woman in a very shallow manner....I saw them as all as mindless ....only concerned with looks.....money .....etc. My gut reaction with Indian women is still to clam up and be very icy with them........but I have to fight it and give them a chance and see them as people.

 

[Archived_Member1]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

I know this is going to sound offensive but I don't think I intend on marrying anyone Sikh let alone Indian. That doesn't mean I'm going to marry whitey but having been raised in an Indian household, seeig first hand how the men are raised on this petastol, has left a very bitter taste in my mouth about the men. I don't like the double standard, and perhaps I'll find that with other cultures but the slightest threat to my freedom turns me off...yes I've painted them all with the same brush but I'm still waiting for that 'exception' to come along and well I'm still waiting

what's wrong with "whitey" ?

i'm a white sikh engaged to a mixed-caste punjabi sikh. what matters is that we share sikhi. yes, sometimes our cultural differences cause misunderstandings between us, but we're learning more about each other every day.

i think our children will be very lucky to come from a mixed family, they'll be more open and have less caste bias.

as long as both partners are sikh, everything should be fine. the goal is 'Ek Jot Doe Murti' after all.

gurfateh!

 

[clarkejoey]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

I will marry someone for who they are, not for what they are.

I can take this position because i am an utter mongrel: paternal line - African, European (some German, some Jewish, and some German-Jewish), with a hint of "who-knows"; maternal line: Indian (don't know what region) plus creolised Welsh.

I can only marry out of race if i meet a suitable sino-Asian with Inuit and/or Australian Aborigine.

Please don't write off a whole race, not for any reason. It's not a matter of "exceptions"; there might be national and racial tendencies, but, basically, peoples are all pretty much alike.

 

[Sherab]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

what's wrong with "whitey" ?

i'm a white sikh engaged to a mixed-caste punjabi sikh. what matters is that we share sikhi. yes, sometimes our cultural differences cause misunderstandings between us, but we're learning more about each other every day.

i think our children will be very lucky to come from a mixed family, they'll be more open and have less caste bias.

as long as both partners are sikh, everything should be fine. the goal is 'Ek Jot Doe Murti' after all.

gurfateh!

Around all my indian friends (ibncluding my girlfriend) i refer to myself as "gora munda"

 

[Kushi]

Re: How Many Siks Have Married out Of Jaat/Zaat (Caste/Race)

Hi,
Her name became Amrit Kaur but yor name is Harbans LAL and not SINGH. please forgive me as i dont wish to hurt anyones feelings but she has adopted the sikh way of life have you ?

 

[satwant]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

Most of the posting contained about Sikhs having distinction among themselves. I believe that it exists only in Punjab. Those who have moved abroad from Punjab have brought their traditions, cultures and also their shortcomings, like a caste system. However, the current third generation of Sikhs don't bother about the caste and that matters to them about their life partner is that he/she is a Sikh. Period.

I think the onus is us to stop the distinction and just accept fellow Sikh as a Sikh. as soon as the thought of distinction is planted in our mind, we go astray of the very teachings of our Gurus'.

Life is moving at a rapid pace and out of Punjab, inter-religious marriages are common and one day it could be a norm. But I still believe that as long as one has been instilled with strong foundations of the Gurus, the correct values and upbringing, nothing can shake or move them from the right path.

 

[Heer_Sohni_Jasleen]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

To : Heer_Sohni_Jasleen,

A warning is hereby served to you for non-observance of SPN Rule No.10
Part of your post has been deleted by Forum Leader - begum


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experienced Windows Systems Admin and Technical Sales consultant (10
years in sys admin). I'll work in either the US or India.

 

[bawaj]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

i dont think that caste was ever removed from sikhism. According to historical accounts, mentioned in History of Sikhs by Khushwant singh, the guru's never married outside their caste.
What do you make of this?

 

[kds1980]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

i dont think that caste was ever removed from sikhism. According to historical accounts, mentioned in History of Sikhs by Khushwant singh, the guru's never married outside their caste.
What do you make of this?

Guru's started the practice of langar where brahmin,shudra,muslims should sit on the floor and eat the langar side by side.This is still unthinkable in majority of india and
they started it in 16th century and you are saying that caste was never removed from sikhism.

Now coming to your point of guru's marriages, Guru nanak's marriage waas fixed by his parents,guru angad dev,guru amardas were already married before they became guru.Bibi bhani expressed the desire to marry guru ramdas so she was married to him.Guru harkrishan died at the age of 7.

so only 5 guru's left.Now you are forgetting that in sikhism sangat plays a very important role and sangat rejected the rishta of chandu's daughter that led to guru' arjan dev' martydom.As there was no norm of intercaste marriage's at that time so its quite possible that only khatri sikhs offered their daughter's hand to guru's and if sangat accepted them then guru's had to accept it.After all we don't have any detailed reliable life history of each guru.I don't think it is a big issue.

 

[kds1980]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

what's wrong with "whitey" ?

i'm a white sikh engaged to a mixed-caste punjabi sikh. what matters is that we share sikhi. yes, sometimes our cultural differences cause misunderstandings between us, but we're learning more about each other every day.

i think our children will be very lucky to come from a mixed family, they'll be more open and have less caste bias.

as long as both partners are sikh, everything should be fine. the goal is 'Ek Jot Doe Murti' after all.

gurfateh!

Kelly ji please don't mind but the term white sikh does not exist the dictionary of majority of punjabi sikhs.marrying whitey means marrying a christian or an atheist.

 

[Sherni]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

I'm only 17 so i have time to think about my marriage, but it'll depend on my parents...
but i would like to say, that we shouldn't make differences, I mean casts are rubbish, so I hope my parents will choose a boy from another cast, because if "everybody" starts doing that, then in few generations there won't be any cast difference...
But maybe is it just an Utopia

 

[kds1980]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

Sherni ji welcome to spn.Its good that you have shared your views with us.

 

[Sherni]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

...thank youuuu...

 

[akal_jsingh]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

If a follower agrees to abide by the guidleines given in the Rahit Maryada, then effectively his previous castes are erased. Otheriwse, he's not yet a Guru's Sikh much as we all would wish it to be true.

 

[sundeepjal]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

i m as society says ramdasia sikh.. i have suffered the brunt of caste system to helm. i had loved my lady for 7 years till her parents 'jatt' rebelled against us till they succeded in parting us both .. i m left alone & now i cry alone only 'coz of this caste difference...it is present here & only here & with a larger connotation but the misery is that it is very much unnoticeable...its a real pity... but i respect my religion... but not its peole... ki kara hallat e kuch eho jahhe ho gayee nee.... DHANVAAD

 

[shab_hundal]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

Hi I am Jatt Sikh and married to hindu girl because we were close friends, and why religion did not come my way because to me religion is very private and spiritual phenomena with more internalities and depth rather than something to flaunt. Apology tendered if you do not agree. But in that case I shall go back to my religious tenets :LETS AGREE TO DISAGREE.

Wishing Sarbat Da Bhala

Shab Singh Hundal

 

[jaskaransingh]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

another reason why sikhi is diappering is that we are again going back into hinduism these sikhs wit cut hiar i do not regard as true sikhs so called sikhs that marry out of sikhi i will never regard as sikh hav some pride sikhs r gettin far too westernised

 

[Lee]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

Kelly ji please don't mind but the term white sikh does not exist the dictionary of majority of punjabi sikhs.marrying whitey means marrying a christian or an atheist.

What then of us whiteys, that have converted to Sikhi?

 

[Lee]

Re: How many sikhs have married out of Caste/Race

another reason why sikhi is diappering is that we are again going back into hinduism these sikhs wit cut hiar i do not regard as true sikhs so called sikhs that marry out of sikhi i will never regard as sikh hav some pride sikhs r gettin far too westernised

I am appalled at the sentiments expressed in this post. Eastern or Western a Sikh is a Sikh. What constitutes a Sikh is laid down very precisely in the Rehat Maryarda, along with the ruling on Khalsa and Kesh.

I am no Khalsa yet, I do though keep my Kesh, even if I do not cover it up with a dastar! Would you then call me a non Sikh?