Why can't I be what I want? | Sikh Philosophy Network
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Why can't I be what I want?

Ryrtt

SPNer
Feb 1, 2020
1
1
21
I have always had long hair, btw I'm 17 rn, and worn a turban. Actually tbh not since the last 3 years cause I wear a cap. Which is also, I don't know why, a big issue. My only question is that I don't like being a sikh. I mean I love what the religion holds theoretically but practically everyone is just too harsh. Ik you're thinking, then why are you even writing this? Cause I'm stuck. My parents are hardliners and would practically disown me if I cut my hair. The thing is that I don't wanna continue being a sikh. Is it too much to ask? I mean free will. I know you'll be like but your parents have taken care of you and given birth to you. Man, I know that but I can't, I'm going mad, I do not want to continue having my hair or wearing a kara. Can't I be an aethist and live my life peacefully? Am I hurting you guys or your religion? I just want to live my life with mental peace. Yk when I was 15, I trimmed my beard. My parents went ballistic and hit me. I mean I know your sentiments and all but how do you expect so much out of a child?? I was a CHILD, I am still a TEEN, why are you trying to take my teenage or youth from me?? Can't i just live without religion rn, being a good person? Maybe later, when I can finally understand your religion I'll be one but not rn
 

swarn bains

Poet
SPNer
Apr 9, 2012
516
144
religion is a myth. no body stops u from what u are but remember do not fall prey to agents of religions
 

Logical Sikh

Writer
SPNer
Sep 22, 2018
179
35
22
I have always had long hair, btw I'm 17 rn, and worn a turban. Actually tbh not since the last 3 years cause I wear a cap. Which is also, I don't know why, a big issue. My only question is that I don't like being a sikh. I mean I love what the religion holds theoretically but practically everyone is just too harsh. Ik you're thinking, then why are you even writing this? Cause I'm stuck. My parents are hardliners and would practically disown me if I cut my hair. The thing is that I don't wanna continue being a sikh. Is it too much to ask? I mean free will. I know you'll be like but your parents have taken care of you and given birth to you. Man, I know that but I can't, I'm going mad, I do not want to continue having my hair or wearing a kara. Can't I be an aethist and live my life peacefully? Am I hurting you guys or your religion? I just want to live my life with mental peace. Yk when I was 15, I trimmed my beard. My parents went ballistic and hit me. I mean I know your sentiments and all but how do you expect so much out of a child?? I was a CHILD, I am still a TEEN, why are you trying to take my teenage or youth from me?? Can't i just live without religion rn, being a good person? Maybe later, when I can finally understand your religion I'll be one but not rn
Where do you live? See i know that Indian parents just expect too much from their children. I think you need some inner peace...
are you a student? WHich class?
From where im sitting i can see you clearly need a break. Since you're 17 i'd guess that you're in 11th or maybe 12th even.
i'd advice you to take a college outside of your city or even state, live in a hostel, with like minded people. you'll get a much needed break from your everyday frustration and by the end of your studies you'll probably figure it out yourself.
But always remember that even if you dont want to keep the outer look, Sikhi still teaches everything about being a good human which'll eventually help you in your life (Hopefully),
I'd also like to say that Sikh (as a philosophy) is not bad ( which im sure you dont think either), its just that its in a really Bad Hands.
lemme know if it makes sense ;)
 

Sikhilove1

Writer
SPNer
Aug 14, 2019
64
11
I have always had long hair, btw I'm 17 rn, and worn a turban. Actually tbh not since the last 3 years cause I wear a cap. Which is also, I don't know why, a big issue. My only question is that I don't like being a sikh. I mean I love what the religion holds theoretically but practically everyone is just too harsh. Ik you're thinking, then why are you even writing this? Cause I'm stuck. My parents are hardliners and would practically disown me if I cut my hair. The thing is that I don't wanna continue being a sikh. Is it too much to ask? I mean free will. I know you'll be like but your parents have taken care of you and given birth to you. Man, I know that but I can't, I'm going mad, I do not want to continue having my hair or wearing a kara. Can't I be an aethist and live my life peacefully? Am I hurting you guys or your religion? I just want to live my life with mental peace. Yk when I was 15, I trimmed my beard. My parents went ballistic and hit me. I mean I know your sentiments and all but how do you expect so much out of a child?? I was a CHILD, I am still a TEEN, why are you trying to take my teenage or youth from me?? Can't i just live without religion rn, being a good person? Maybe later, when I can finally understand your religion I'll be one but not rn
your parents are wrong to force you to do something you don’t want to do and force those beliefs onto you.
that’s actually what the Muslim moguls did centuries ago and the Gurus were totally against this, to the point that some were killed and tortured in refusing to believe in what the moguls wanted them to.


Tell your parents this. The Gurus taught Freedom of Choice and freedom in general. They helped people from other religions to not be forced into accepting another religion when there was nothing in it for them.

Freedom is the basis of Sikhi. I would advise that you tell your parents these stories.
 

duvyank95

SPNer
Feb 12, 2020
1
1
24
Tell your parents this. The Gurus taught Freedom of Choice and freedom in general. They helped people from other religions to not be forced into accepting another religion when there was nothing in it for them.
 

Logical Sikh

Writer
SPNer
Sep 22, 2018
179
35
22
Tell your parents this. The Gurus taught Freedom of Choice and freedom in general. They helped people from other religions to not be forced into accepting another religion when there was nothing in it for them.
While this is a very genuine thing to discuss with your parents, but there is ONE THIng that i've learned after alootttt of debate and discussion about religion and its practices with my parents that Parents...... Mostly DESI or INDIAN parents dont want to hear advice from their Children.... because to them, we'll always be inferior and they'll always be superior.....
and sadly there is nothing you can do about it tbh, you just have to live with it.... it takes time but they do give you "Your" Space after some time but there is ALOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTT of patience in there XD.
 

Sikhilove1

Writer
SPNer
Aug 14, 2019
64
11
While this is a very genuine thing to discuss with your parents, but there is ONE THIng that i've learned after alootttt of debate and discussion about religion and its practices with my parents that Parents...... Mostly DESI or INDIAN parents dont want to hear advice from their Children.... because to them, we'll always be inferior and they'll always be superior.....
and sadly there is nothing you can do about it tbh, you just have to live with it.... it takes time but they do give you "Your" Space after some time but there is ALOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTT of patience in there XD.
Its still handy to teach people living in the darkness of ignorance the Truth, regardless of what’s in it for you.

Thats what Nanak did.
 

Logical Sikh

Writer
SPNer
Sep 22, 2018
179
35
22
It's still handy to teach people living in the darkness of ignorance the Truth, regardless of what’s in it for you.

That's what Nanak did.
What I personally think is You just Cannot possibly have the same impact that Nanak had to his contemporaries (unless you're on some very high POST ) especially if you're 17 yr old. Because as a 17-year-old your parents probably see you as just a clumsy troublemaker kid (I'm 22 and my parents still won't listen to me in philosophical context ).
I think to have an impact like Nanak, to your parents or anyone around you, you either have to be REALLY FAMOUS or REALLY RICH otherwise nobody takes anyone seriously in modern times......
especially parents very rarely listen to their kid's advice because No.1 YOU ARE NOT NANAK or especially if you don't have full hair on your FACE like @Ryrtt they always have a mindset that they are far more experienced than their kids and 'course they want the best for you, whatever "Best" is according to THEM.
You have to be realistic.
 

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