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Opinion Ardaas, Condolences For Mai Harinder Kaur Now Bereaved Widow Of Simon McCoy


1947-2014 (Archived)
Jun 17, 2004
Simon McCoy, husband of our beloved Mai Harinder Kaur ji, esteemed mentor and member of Sikh Philosophy Network, left his physical body on September 21, at 0230, Pacific Time. He suffered from kidney and liver failure. After several days in ICU and then hospice care, Simon returned to Akaal.

Simon's funeral is scheduled for Friday September 30 giving time for his oldest son to arrive from Kenya.

Simon is survived by his sons and their families.

And of course, he is survived by our own Mai Harinder Kaur, wife of 22 and one-half years.

Death is a time of loss and separation, felt intensely by those closest to the deceased. We hope that our sister, Mai ji, will find sufficient personal time to rest for she has had a difficult week, to say the least.

Mai Harinder's devotion to Sikhi has been her support. Her profound belief in the Hukam of Waheguru has sustained her, along with her steadfast commitment to Shabd Guru, and her path of Sukhmani Sahib to find equipoise at this time.

The leadership team at Sikh Philosophy Network feel nothing but the most poignant emotions. We also feel honored to stand with her, and pray with her.

Will you join us in ardaas and in offering your condolences?


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Harry Haller

Panga Master
Jan 31, 2011
From what little I know of you Maiji, I know you have the strength to deal with this, a million times better than I could, many gain strength from your courage and faith, including me,

may Waheguru help you find that courage and faith this week and every week after


May 9, 2006
Mai ji, my sincere condolences to you and your family. May you feel Guruji's presence close to you and find consolation in Naam at this difficult time.

There's a big spiritual hug on it's way to you from me. You've been such a support to me and others here, now it's our turn to support you. You are in our thoughts.

The memory of Simon will live on in your family's hearts.


ੴ / Ik▫oaʼnkār
Dec 21, 2010
Death is a very profound and troubling time. Many a moments one feals at the threshold of death one self. I of recent (our son of 24 years last year) and of late (my father in 1989) had two losses in our family.

What I am realizing is that no one ever dies they just leave their physical body and ability to interact directly.

However, the interactions that they had with family, friends, acquaintances or even strangers are a legacy that shapes many a more lives in measure small and large. As such shapes many a lives it becomes bigger than oneself that died if all is counted in. Let in this bereavement such be a source of pride for a life well lived recognition of legacy impacting innumerable others.

Heart felt best wishes in this bereavement and may the family have ever greater strength to cope.

Tejwant Singh

Jun 30, 2004
Henderson, NV.
Mai ji,[/FONT]

Guru Fateh.[/FONT][/FONT]

At times, words are not suffice to express one's feelings and even if one tries to find them to share, they just disappear in oblivion.
We use the phrase “Chardi Kala” quite often in Sikhi. It has a very powerful meaning. It does not mean that a Sikh is on the top of the mountain all the times but how quickly s/he gets up, dusts off and starts climbing the cliffs of life again after having been rolled down because of force majeure. [/FONT]

I was talking to a Christian couple who are close friends of mine about the marriage vows in Christianity and in Sikhi. As they had recently attended the Sikh Anand Karaj of a daughter of a common friend, which they loved and were very much interested in the whole aspects of Sikh wedding.[/FONT]

I told them that in Christian vows, it is “Till death do us part”, but in Sikh marriage vows it is, “Till death make us even closer”. And come to think of it this is exactly what the Sikh marriage means.[/FONT]

Mai ji,[/FONT]

[/FONT]It is also interesting to notice how people who are near and dear to us show us what living is all about while they are at the end of their own journey. They teach us how to celebrate life by demonstrating their blooming within while we only notice their withering due to our own anticipation of the loss. Little do we know that by leaving this world, they become closer to us forever.
The proof is in the goose bumps that crop up ever so often when they are on our minds, in our thoughts, in our gestures and in our deeds.

And Mai ji, I am sure Simon is one of them.

My friend, Leo Anderson [Jan 3,1952 - July 11,2007], passed away some years ago, and the following was on the funeral services invitation card: [/FONT][/FONT]

When I come to the end of the road and the sun has set me free.[/FONT]
I want no rites in a gloom filled room, Why cry for the soul set free?[/FONT]

[/FONT]Miss me a little - but not so long, And not with your head bowed low.[/FONT]
Remember the love we once shared, Miss me - but let me go,[/FONT]

For this is the journey we all must take, And each must go alone.[/FONT]
It's all part of the Master's plan, A step on the road to home. [/FONT]

[/FONT]When you are lonely and sick at heart, [/FONT]
Go to the friends we know, [/FONT]

[/FONT]Bury your sorrows in doing good deeds, [/FONT]
Miss Me - But Let Me Go.[/FONT]

[/FONT](Author Unknown) [/FONT]

Mai ji,[/FONT]
I am sure Simon would be saying the same.[/FONT]

Peace and love.


Randip Singh

May 25, 2005
United Kingdom
My heart felt condolensces.

For those who know Mai Harinder Kaur ji, know about her devotion to Sikhi. They also know about the immense hardship she went through in the past as well and yet still remained strong.

Surviving events like the Delhi pogroms and still remaining strong and having a resolute faith in Onkar and accepting Hukam.

You are an inspiration to me and my family.
May 23, 2009
Mai jee,
We are all saddened to hear of the loss of your beloved husband.As a Sikh,you are well aware that God's Hukam must be obeyed and when we do that: <TABLE cellSpacing=5>
ਜਿਨ ਸਤਿਗੁਰ ਕਾ ਭਾਣਾ ਮੰਨਿਆ ਤਿਨ ਚੜੀ ਚਵਗਣਿ ਵੰਨੇ ਇਹ ਚਾਲ ਨਿਰਾਲੀ ਗੁਰਮੁਖੀ ਗੁਰ ਦੀਖਿਆ ਸੁਣਿ ਮਨੁ ਭਿੰਨੇ ॥੨੫॥

<TBODY></TBODY></TABLE><TABLE cellSpacing=5>
Those who surrender to the True Guru's Will are imbued with the four-fold Love of the Lord. This is the unique and distinct life-style of the Gurmukhs: listening to the Guru's Teachings, their minds blossom forth. ||25||
With Guru's Grace,I feel ,you are well equipped to live in His Hukam.Gurbani is our only solace.The Guru exhorts us to remember:

</TABLE><TABLE cellSpacing=5>

<TBODY></TBODY></TABLE><TABLE cellSpacing=5>ਮਾਝ ਮਹਲਾ ਕਹਿਆ ਕਰਣਾ ਦਿਤਾ ਲੈਣਾ ਗਰੀਬਾ ਅਨਾਥਾ ਤੇਰਾ ਮਾਣਾ ਸਭ ਕਿਛੁ ਤੂੰਹੈ ਤੂੰਹੈ ਮੇਰੇ ਪਿਆਰੇ ਤੇਰੀ ਕੁਦਰਤਿ ਕਉ ਬਲਿ ਜਾਈ ਜੀਉ ॥੧॥
Maajh, Fifth Mehl: As You command, I obey; as You give, I receive. You are the Pride of the meek and the poor. You are everything; You are my Beloved. I am a sacrifice to Your Creative Power. ||1||
We all pray with you that Akal Purkh blesses you with Charhdi Kala to live in His Hukam,as He has blessed you in the past.
With love and regards,
Satnam Singh

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Cleverness is not wisdom
May 2, 2010
Dear Mai Ji

I have been away for a while and am deeply saddened to learn of your loss

I wanted to share this with you:

Our birth is but a sleep and a forgetting:
The Soul that rises with us, our life's Star,
Hath had elsewhere its setting,
And cometh from afar:
Not in entire forgetfulness,
And not in utter nakedness,
But trailing clouds of glory do we come
From God, who is our home:
Heaven lies about us in our infancy!
Shades of the prison-house begin to close
Upon the growing Boy,
But He beholds the light, and whence it flows,
He sees it in his joy



ਨਾਮ ਤੇਰੇ ਕੀ ਜੋਤਿ ਲਗਾਈ (Previously namjap)
Jul 14, 2007
Please accept my condolences for the loss of your husband. I never met him, but I imagine he was a great guy if he was anything like you. It never seems fair when people we are close to die. I am at a loss for words.



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