Sikhism Is Just A Fashion Symbol For Most

[D-Singh]

Firstly, you must be thinking who am I to make such a statement.

But it is what I see everyday, wannabe gangsta's using Sikhism and the Khanda as a fashion statement. The "Trim Singhs" with a khanda on their car, sporting trimmed beards. The Sikh's with cut hair, with huge kara's, using punjabi slang. Who when I ask why don't they wear a turban, respond "because I can't girls that way bruv"

Yet none of them know the 10 Guru's, the 5 K's or anything about the essence of Sikhism. Alot of them drink and smoke and yet latch onto Sikhism.

I was born into a Sikh family, and from what I've seen from the extended family and every other Sikh in the community, they contradict themselves. Sikhism gave me cutis verticis gyrata...wanna know what it is? google it, my scalp is messed and I am in pain, because of not being allowed to cut my hair. More needs to taught about this to more Sikhs.

Its all nice and righteous when you think about wearing a turban, not cutting your hair. But the reality is totally different. How can a religion be helpful when it damages you phsyically and emotionally?

My religion and faith is in life, no symbols, no idols, just in the air that we breath and the common sense to treat people and life with respect.

 

[spnadmin]

There are ways around this problem of pain and a sore scalp. Don't give up yet. The religion is not damaging you. You just have to be a little less intense. Let me find that article -- a good one -- by a dermatologist who is a Singh and has written a medical article about the problem.

 

[D-Singh]

There are ways around this problem of pain and a sore scalp. Don't give up yet. The religion is not damaging you. You just have to be a little less intense. Let me find that article -- a good one -- by a dermatologist who is a Singh and has written a medical article about the problem.

Mate, if you only knew my suffering. My dad, who wears a turban and has a full beard. Used to beat my mum, who is only 5ft ffs. He would drink and beat her even when she was pregnant.

He beat all of my siblings too. My mum didn't even have a choice to marry him! My grandmother married her off to him. I'll give him this though, my dad told my grandmother straight how controlling she was, which was true.

Instead of letting my mother stay in school, my grandmother made her work in a factory, and now she has major health problems!!! My grandmother was an influential person in the gurdwara too. But she was controlling and manipulative, even my mums teacher came to her house to plead with my grandmother to let her stay in school, my grandmother said no.

So this legacy affected my families life, my grandmother told the rest of the family we were no good, and all my cousins stopped talking to us.

So much for believing in God and helping others eh?

 

[spnadmin]

I cannot find the article -- it will take time. But you might be on your way to suffering from a condition called Traction Alopecia which is a kind of pattern baldness caused by wearing hear in a tight bun. Could be accompanied by sore, itching scalp. This is a common problem among Sikh men and Japanese women. And there is information all over the Internet about it.

This is what I remember from the article. Do not wear any head covering at night when you sleep so your scalp can get some air. Also comb out your hair and tie it in a loose pony tail. Don't use rubber bands because they damage the hair and scalp. If you deal with this problem sooner rather than later discomfort and hair loss can be kept to a minimum. Also there is some kind of pill that can be prescribed. I think it is called Nizoral.

If you take amrit then maybe all of this is off-limits. But something tells me that Waheguru ji is lenient.

 

[spnadmin]

Mate, if you only knew my suffering. My dad, who wears a turban and has a full beard. Used to beat my mum, who is only 5ft ffs. He would drink and beat her even when she was pregnant.

He beat all of my siblings too. My mum didn't even have a choice to marry him! My grandmother married her off to him. I'll give him this though, my dad told my grandmother straight how controlling she was, which was true.

Instead of letting my mother stay in school, my grandmother made her work in a factory, and now she has major health problems!!! My grandmother was an influential person in the gurdwara too. But she was controlling and manipulative, even my mums teacher came to her house to plead with my grandmother to let her stay in school, my grandmother said no.

So this legacy affected my families life, my grandmother told the rest of the family we were no good, and all my cousins stopped talking to us.

So much for believing in God and helping others eh?

D-Singh ji

Well your first comment linked your suffering as a Sikh to your hair. You have shifted gears now to a more intense background story. You can't go back and change what happened. You can become a different person yourself. I am sorry this happened to you. Try to relax. There are some really fine Singhs here at SPN who can listen and help you take calmer and more beneficial path. Seek them out. You owe it to yourself. Keep us posted. You kind of shook me up.

 

[D-Singh]

D-Singh ji

Well your first comment was about your hair. You have shifted gears now to a more intense background story. You can't go back and change what happened. You can become a different person yourself. I am sorry this happened to you. Try to relax. There are some really fine Singhs here at SPN who can listen and help you take calmer and more beneficial path. Seek them out. You owe it to yourself. Keep us posted. You kind of shook me up.

Yep, the hair problem runs hand in hand with this stuff. My hair started falling out when I was 11, and no one in my family noticed, too consumed by family politics. So by 15 half my hair has fallen out, and over 10 years later none of my hair has come back.

I mean my sister who is religious, specifically looked for a Sikh who wore a turban...when it came down to marriage. When I tried to explain how my hair loss and the bumps have devestated me, she told me I looked better in a pugh. I told her why don't you wear one then! And she said that those girls that wear pugh's are weird. Its all so much contradiction. If I was born into any other culture my health would be better, its messes with your head.

 

[spnadmin]

I don't know about that. There are a lot of messed-up Roman Catholics with stories not too different from your own.

 

[D-Singh]

I don't know about that. There are a lot of messed-up Roman Catholics with stories not too different from your own.

Indeed, it goes to show how religion actually segregates, however spiritual it seems to be on the surface.

The Chinese have it nailed down, believing in chi. In modern age and with more knowledge of consciousness, religion is just food for the ego. Ego being self image, and thought driven. The real cruxt of what we are, is the awareness behind our thoughts...the space inbetween our thoughts...that my friend is "God".

 

[spnadmin]

Indeed, it goes to show how religion actually segregates, however spiritual it seems to be on the surface.

The Chinese have it nailed down, believing in chi. In modern age and with more knowledge of consciousness, religion is just food for the ego. Ego being self image, and thought driven. The real cruxt of what we are, is the awareness behind our thoughts...the space inbetween our thoughts...that my friend is "God".

Here I would disagree. it is not religion but religionists who cause pain and suffering. How is your description of the pain of ego any different from what Guru Nanak has taught. Take a look with just a little bit of effort at his teaching on that point.

 

[D-Singh]

Here I would disagree. it is not religion but religionists who cause pain and suffering. How is your description of the pain of ego any different from what Guru Nanak has taught. Take a look with just a little bit of effort at his teaching on that point.

The whole point I am getting at is, is that the Sikh belief of not cutting ones hair...leads to traction alopecia and damage to the scalp. No other religion suffers the same result. Which is painfully ironic, that we are taught not to cut our hair. I am left with this messed up scalp, and what choice did I have? none. I'm seeing a dermatologist next month and I am **** scared of the prospect of having a scalp reduction.

 

[spnadmin]

D-Singh ji

I more or less understood your point. As a woman I don't have these same dilemmas and fears. Whether to pluck my eyebrows doesn't come close to your situation. The internet is full of blogs on the subject of traction baldness and some even focus on Sikh issues. If you like, I will send you some links. You may find out that there are support groups on this topic. There are also literally dozens of web sites on the topic with a lot of medical information. Information helps to increase confidence.

My only hope is that you do not confuse the Sikh belief in not cutting hair with thoughtless and blind experiences of your childhood. You were not given help when you needed it. Now you suffer. It would be great if some of our members who keep kesh, and who even suffer this themselves, would befriend you and help sort things out. Sat Nam