HUNKAAR (EGO)
Rajinder Singh ‘Arshi’
Rajinder Singh ‘Arshi’
INTRODUCTION
Increasingly, and regrettably, people observe more bigotry and hypocrisy in the House of God than elsewhere in Society. This is the reason often quoting by youngsters, today, for staying away from places of worship. They appear to ‘smell’ hypocrisy from a mile. They claim to see into the dual personas of their elders - on the one hand pretending to be acting in the interests of humanity and on the other hand doing quite the opposite in their practical day to day dealings. This is of course not entirely true as there are many well-meaning individuals who have a genuine desire to serve people and do so with great humility and dedication.
DEFINITION
Hunkaar is a derivation of the term ahankaar. The nearest translation of hunkaar in English is ‘ego’. Ego may be defined as pride based on one’s perception of self importance, worldly possessions and intelligence.
The Sikh Gurus have used both the terms hunkaar and haumaito represent ego. Haumai, however, is used more often in Gurbani as it expresses the concept of‘individuality’ or ‘is-ness’(putting one’s self interest before everything else) more accurately, as Sikhism understands it. Guru Angad Dev Ji (the second Nanak) says ego is a chronic disease (haumai deeragh rog hai – GGS 466).
In modern times ego has several meanings, for example, it is seen to denote an inflated or exaggerated sense of self-worth. In philosophical terms we may refer to this as ‘ones self’ or ‘I am’ or even ‘is-ness’. Jung talks about the ‘principle (concept) of individuation’ which will need to be discussed in separate article. Even Freud initially interpreted ego as meaning a ‘sense of self’ although he later connected it to psychic function and got obsessed with synthetic technicalities.
Sikhism is not interested in Freud’s or Jung’s technical intricacies of synthesis of information, memory and intellectual functioning of the mind. This is more of an earthly pursuit than engagement in the search of spiritual enlightenment. In fact these are the very barriers which keep the individual away from realising the real goal, that of lighting the ‘lamp of wisdom’ in ‘mind's temple’ – kar kirpa jo Satgur mileo; man mandar meh deepak jaleo (Raag Gauri M.5). This is the only way to conquer ego if jeeva is to achieve oneness with the Supreme Power.
Whilst inferiority complex is considered a negative trait in a person’s make up so is an exaggerated sense of superiority. Inclination towards ego and self-importance makes a person arrogant and devoid of compassion. Such an individual cannot do much good in society.
WHAT CAUSES EGO?
Where does ego come from and how can it be removed?
Haumai kithhu oopjai kit sanjam ih jaa-ay (M: 2 GGS 466). Guru Angad Dev Ji asks the question and then answers it in the next line - haumai ayho hukam hai paeyai kirat feraahi.The Lord rewards people according to their past actions and their attitudes and wanderings in current lives are part and parcel of karma. Thus many wander in egoistical pursuits.
Ego is the result of several factors, the main ones are listed below:
Good looks and health: Nature is kind to many by endowing them with good looks and sturdy health. This creates a superiority complex in the subject concerned.
Brilliant mind: Some are born geniuses and others develop good mental skills. These people too become the victims of their own wisdom and brilliance.
Parentage and contacts: Being born with a silver spoon in the mouth is regarded as a reward for past actions. If not handled gracefully this boon could easily turn into a curse. Wealth handled recklessly, with excessive ego, can disappear very quickly with dire consequences.
Sudden good fortune: Some become millionaires overnight due to good fortune (e.g. win on the lottery, successful property deals and inheritance). Only a few are able to handle such good fortune and in the case of many it is an ‘easy come easy go’ affair.
Spiritual status and achievements: Superior knowledge of the scriptures, ridhis and sidhis (occult powers) inflate ego and leads one astray. Some start playing God. Such individuals will never find Param Pad. “Reading and reciting, the pundits, the religious scholars, and the silent sages have grown weary, but they have not found the supreme essence of the Fourth State” says Guru Amar Das (M:3 GGS 117).
Success: Good fortune in business and professional dealings often make a person arrogant and self-conceited. Pride drives the person away from the ordinary and less fortunate people.
HOW EGO EFFECTS US (dangers imposed by ego)
The causes of ego mentioned above can influence a person’s personality to change from a humble disposition to one of exaggerated sense of self-importance. Ego makes a person become impetuous, restless and temperamental. The pressures imposed by it leave him stressed and exhausted.
Gurbani refers to such an individual as a (1) manmukh. Deeds done out of egotism will only cause him more pain, says Guru Amar Das (manmukh karam karey ahaNkaaree sabh ḏukẖo ḏukh kamaaey – GGS 87).
Ego can overshadow even the good work done by a person. Acts of charity committed with ego will negate a person’s good intentions and are not spiritually effective. Outside appearances do not matter unless humility comes from the soul.
Acting in egotism will not bring a person closer to the Lord even by wearing religious robes, says Nanak (haumai karat bhaykhee nahee jaanieyaa. (M:1 GGS 226).
Ego is like a rope which not only ties a person’s mind but also strangles his soul (The mind is tied with the rope of egotism - M:1 GGS 1189). A person engrossed in egotism is ensnared by the intellect of his own mind (M:5 GGS 42). An individual in this situation becomes the victim of sexual desire, anger and egotism and often does not know what he is saying or doing until it is too late (manmukh bol na jaaṇnee onaa anḏar kaam krodh ahaNkaar – M 3 GGS 950). We often say an egoistic person is intoxicated with pride or blinded by his success and good fortune, both of which drive a person away from others and this continues unless ego is restrained (kar ahaNkaar ho­ey varṯeh andh - M:5 GGS 889).
An egoistic, self-willed person will never be able to take advantage of his human form and will remain in the vicious cycle of life and death (manmukh ahaNkaare fir joonee bẖ-vai – M:1 GGS 228).
A direct effect of humility will reflect in our actions. Guru Angad Dev says – "haumai aeyho hukam hai paeyai kirat firaahi”. As per Lord’s Ordinance, our ego is the direct result of our past actions. The only way to rid ourselves of this chronic disease is to perform good deeds in our current existence otherwise it will be back to the same routine of birth and death. If we insist on the path of (2) mankukhta the cycle of bad karma and reincarnation will continue – the soul will never find salvation.
Guru Arjan goes to great lengths to stress the evil influence of ego on our soul. His wisdom is enshrined on page 1358 of Guru Granth Sahib as follows:
hay janam maran moolaN ahaNkaaraN paapaatmaa.
O egotism, you are the root cause of birth and death and the cycle of reincarnation; you are in fact the very soul of sin.
mitraN tajant satraN darirhaaNt anik mayaa bisteerneh.
You influence people to forsake friends and instead they cling to enemies; you create and spread countless illusions of maya.
aavant jaavant thakant jeeaa dukh sukh baho bhognah.
Living beings (souls) come and go, because of you, until they are exhausted; under your influence they experience pain and pleasure.
bharam bhayaan udi-aan ramnaN mahaa bikat asaadh rognah.
You drive them into wilderness and terrible bouts of self-doubt and dilemma; you inflict them with the most horrible and incurable diseases.
Guru Ji follows this up with heavenly advice that there is only one physician who can save us from the onslaught of ego, the one Transcendent Supreme Lord; therefore always, meditate, adore and worship that Lord (baid-yaN paarbarahm parmaysvar aaraadh naanak har har haray – GGS 1358).
We have a tendency to become proud of his worldly achievements and status. We forget that wealth and status can be wiped out very quickly ending in nothing but remorse. We have seen in our own lifetime how the fortunes of some individuals changed with drastic consequences. The Shahof Persia was deposed and had to abandon his throne and flee his country. Idi Amin was responsible for displacing hundreds of thousands of Asians from Uganda and a lot of bloodshed ensued. He did not remain in power for long. No man on earth had as much power and sway over his people as did Sadam Hussain of Iraq. We have seen how it all ended for him, his family, friends and loved ones. The destruction it led to was impossible to assess. Such are the consequences of extreme obsession with this propensity that it prompted Guru Nanak to say “I have seen the world being destroyed by greed and egotism (Jag binsaṯ ham ḏeykhi­aa lobhė ahaNkaaraa – GGS 228).
Guru Nanak very aptly pointed out: “Were I to install myself on the throne of an emperor, possessing a huge army, endowed with worldly riches; And were I able to exercise total control over my people, all this will not help achieve Eternal Bliss, for O’ Nanak, such worldly possessions will blow away with the mere gust of wind” (GGS 14).
Some individuals even get an inflated view of self from their acts of charity and religious recognition and status. Others become proud of religious merit attained through pilgrimages. Some acquire occult powers by worshiping satanic gods
Guru Nanak enlightens us: “Were I to become a man of mystic powers, adept in the arts of occult and mysticism, able to perform miracles and summon wealth and glory at will; were I to become visible and invisible at will, thereby earning myself the reverence and esteem of all people - may I not O Lord on attaining this forget Thee and remember not Thy Name” (GGS 14).
The world is just a dramatic play and it is human nature to get over-excited on achieving worldly success and status and hit the bottomless pit of depression on losing these. Bhagat Ravidas likens a man to a puppet: “Look how the puppet of clay dances. When he acquires something he becomes inflated with ego and when he loses it he wails uncontrollably” (GGS 487).
Houmai is the worst of the five thieves. Many spiritual men and women manage to overcome the first four but falter on the fifth. Even when they do manage to conquer all five, they are not able to sustain this spiritual balance for long. The feeling that they have conquered all five once again opens the door for ego to creep in. It is important that the sense of humility must prevail at all times.
Its only when egotism departs that the state of supreme dignity (param pad) is obtained – says Guru Nanak (GGS 226). Therefore, abandon your mind to the True Guru and at the same time unburden your problems and place them at his door. By doing so the outcome of your actions rests with the Guru and he will surely resolve all the affairs of his humble servant (Man biechai satgur kai paas tis sayvak kay kaaraj raas – M:5 GGS 286). The Guru himself then takes responsibility andprotects the honour and status of his disciple. In return he only asks for total humility and surrender to the Will of the Lord (hamri jaat patt gur satgur hum vaicheo – M:4 GGS 731).
Can ego be justified? Many say that it is acceptable for a person to feel some sense of pride over genuine achievements –after all we are human beings – they claim. True there are many decent, generally humble people who are sometimes given to harmless flights of pride. We must differentiate between pride and ego. Pride some will say is the first stage on the path towards ego. Ego, whilst a latent force within us, does not develop over a day. It evolves over a period of time and harmless thoughts of pride do tend to sow seeds of ego. Whilst it is impossible to avoid an occasional sense of pride on our successes, at the same time it is important to thank the Lord for His Grace and Blessings. This will quickly bring us down to earth and spare us from the evil clutches of ego.
REMEDIES (how to control ego)
Restrain greed: Human nature is based on greed. We are always seeking wealth and prosperity. Even when the Lord obliges we ask for more but He never tires of giving. So what do we offer Him in return? In return be kind to His people. Show love to mankind and above all stay humble.
What words do we utter to evoke His Love? In the early hours of each morning (amrit vaila) meditate on the True Name, and contemplate His infinite qualities (Japji GGS 2).
Although ego is a chronic disease, fortunately, it also contains its own cure (haumai deeragh rog hai daaroo bhee is maahi – GGS 466). The cure lies in the Shabad (the Word). With the Shabad wash away the filth of your vices. The Lord will grant His Grace only if you act according to your Guru’s teachings (kirpaa karay jay aapnee taa gur kaa sabad kamahi – M:1 GGS 466).
So burn away your egoistic pride, attachment and greed, and wash away your filth, says Guru Nanak (Ha­umai mamṯaa lobh jaalhu sabaḏ mail chukaaee-­ai - GGS 843).
Talk to the mind (address your mind): Guru Ram Das Ji suggests a psychological solution. He advises “say to yourself - I am egotistical. I am conceited, and my intellect is futile and only the Guru’s blessings will wash away my selfishness and conceit (hum ahaNkaaree ahaNkaar agi­aan maṯ gur mili­ai aap gavaaeyaa - GGS 172)”.
Sewa and Saadh Sangat: Serve with humility and without expectation of return. The Sikh Gurus have laid great stress on serving humanity with tan, Man, dhan (body, spirit and wealth, respectively). Also see remedies under the earlier article Lobh (Greed).
Think of the less fortunate: We have a tendency of always looking upwards, i.e. looking at people who appear to be more fortunate than us in terms of fame and wealth. This affects people in different ways. Some harbour jealousy and ill feelings towards the more affluent members of their society. Others will embark on ambitious programmes of their own to outdo them. Many become depressed. All of these are, in terms of spirituality, negative reactions which take us away from our real goal – merger with the Supreme Soul. Only by conquering self-conceit will the gurmukh find the Lord and achieve subsequent merger with the Supreme Soul (aap maar gurmukh har paaey Nanak sahej s-maa-ey laeyaa - M:1 GGS 907).
Think of the less fortunate and thank the Lord for what He has given you. Nurture contentment because without contentment the craving for more will never end (bina santokh nahin ko raja - M:5 GGS 279). Greed renders a person’s life worthless. Greed and ego are interrelated – one feeds the other.
By serving God’s people one automatically serves his Guru which assists immensely in shedding ego. Serving the Guru, I have found eternal peace; my ego has been silenced and subdued (Gur seyvaa tey sadaa sukh paaeyaa haumai meraa thaak rahaa-ey-aa - M:3 GGS 110)
Pilgrimages not the answer: Undertaking regular and hectic pilgrimages will not automatically curb ego; in fact it can often be counter-productive and result in the pilgrim gathering more of the dirt of egotism (M:3 GGS 116).
Is self-denial the answer? Yogis run to the forest to escape from the five evils but are often undone by the fifth, i.e. ego. They claim that the life of the householder is full of distractions and pitfalls and opt for the life of an ascetic. However, Sikh Gurus do not recommend isolation. They claim that the life of the householder is the best way to realise God. Whilst the householder’s life is no bed of roses and is often charged with anxiety, it is in fact the trials and tribulations of this mode of life that moulds the character and assist the individual to look inwards and recognise his ‘true self’. Guru Arjan enlightens us when he says that whilst the householder's life has its anxieties, in the life of the ascetic there is egotism (GGS 385).
CONCLUSION
For the vast majority it is impossible to escape from ego altogether. Even the realisation that one has conquered, recreates it. We are all smitten by it at one time or another. This is the reason why this propensity is the hardest to come to terms with. The author found this article hardest to write because whilst one can enjoy partial success in tackling the other evils, ego, for mere mortals is impossible to overcome. So how does one write about something which is beyond one’s reach? It is at times like this that the True Guru’s grace is appreciated. We are after all human and will make mistakes, and that is why when we conclude our Ardas each day we ask for forgiveness for our transgressions and seek Guru’s grace to guide us and to keep us on the righteous path. The Guru will bestow his grace provided the Sikh is sincere. Even temporary moments of humility may yield glimpses to enable one to understand houmai.
Each day we sin and each day we have an opportunity to confess our transgressions and beg for forgiveness. The Daily Ardas offers us this opportunity but it must be done sincerely with a resolve to repent and practice the teachings of the Sikh Gurus. Merely giving lip service is just not good enough. Guru Nanak blesses us with following verse which should be incorporated into our Daily Ardas:
“Our sins are as immeasurable as the water that fills the seas and the oceans. O Lord, have mercy upon our souls and extend a little pity; keep the sin-laden mankind afloat. With Your Grace even the sinking stones will float. Our souls burn in the fire of ignorance and sin and the innerself is being shredded by unseen scissors of desires and vain pursuits. Pray Nanak that we may come to terms with the Lord's Order so that we may live in Eternal Bliss (Jeytaa samund saagar neer bhari-aa taytay augan hamaaray - GGS 156).”
Guru Arjan says “In the Company of the Holy, I have renounced my other cares and anxieties. I dug a deep pit, and buried my egotistical pride, emotional attachment and the desires of my mind” (GGS 671). A person driven by ego can never benefit society. The thick simmal tree stands tall, straight and proud but it produces nothing of value. Its fruit is bland, flowers scentless and its leaves serve no useful purpose. Even the birds which perch on it fly away disappointed. Guru Nanak says humility is a virtuous quality and sweetness lies only in humility (GGS 470).He preferred ‘kodhrey di roti’ (dry, course bread) of humble Lalo to the sumptuous food offered by the rich and egoistic Malik Bhago.
Ego will not help the soul in achieving Unification with the Supreme Soul. Why then, Guru Nanak asks, do we look on our wealth with such pride and joy; nothing goes along with us when we depart (kaahay maal darab daykh garab jaahi; chaltee baar tayro kachhoo naahi – GGS 1189).
(1) manmukh: A self-centred persons who follows his mind rather than his conscious.
(2) mankukhta: Act of a manmukh or acting likea manmukh
Author's notes:
1. This is the first edition of the article – it may undergo changes for quality and accuracy.
2. For simplicity, throughout this article, I have referred to the masculine gender but, wherever appropriate, this should be read as including the female gender.
3. Differences of opinion are inevitable when interpreting Gurbani. The author most humbly regrets any inaccuracy or errors in quoting or interpreting Gurbani and prays Satguru grants him the boon of greater insight into understanding the Guru’s word.
Copyright: Rajinder Singh ’Arshi’