Re: In love
Karanji,
Yes, we look to all women in our life as mothers, daughters or sisters. I find this extremely easy, but then I am older than you, and its easier for me with my hormones not all going crazy.
The steps you take now, at your young age, will forge the way your life goes from here. Study hard, get some qualifications, live for the future, as opposed to the now, and things could be very different for you in a few years time. To feel love and attraction is completely normal, and I happen to think of it as a gift from Guruji. Now if someone you respect enormously gave you a gift, you would not wish to abuse it, would you? In the same way this magnificent gift can be cherished within the boundaries of Sikhi, or abused outside of those boundaries, to what level of abuse is down to you, and I would have to say you would have to be unique not to have thoughts that you know in your heart are wrong.
The only advice I can give you is that to fall in love, get married, have children, and enjoy your love with your wife is one way that these feelings will never be tarnished with guilt, sadness, rage, shame. You will be pure, and you can enjoy the gift from Guruji as Guruji intended, however, each time you abuse this, it will leave a mark on you, and to what extent you wish to abuse this, is to what extent you wish to carry a whole lot of baggage throughout your life.
This girl that proposed you, for now, she is like your sister, she needs to be protected, as a Sikh, it is your duty to look forward, could she regret this in later life, could she get pregnant, could either of you get an infection, life is not really like it is in the films, such unions, without the background of love, tend to be very disapointing, but after the disapointment, if that were not enough, lies the physical and mental consequences you have left each other with, also, I note you are in India, not New York, so the social consequences are going to be different.
Have love for everyone, at some point you feel a special love for a special person, deal with it in a responsible fashion, do not put yourself, or another, in a situation that could affect either of you for the rest of your lives.
Although we live in a society that seems dominated by 'love', even when you do meet that special person, it will be a different love to the love you feel for yourself, and ultimately Guruji, that bond is precious, it will see you through any problem or crisis, but remember, if you are trying to replicate that love with another person, you cannot, but regardless whether you find love or not, you always have Guruji in your head.