Go With Flow Or Not?

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May 15, 2012
waheguru g ka khalsa
wahegru g ki fateh g

gurbani says to accept the will of god. so it means we should go with flow, whatever life serves we should accept it as it is and never complains about it.
m really confused at this point that when should we struggle n when not.

as in london m unemployed at the moment.
my husband dont want me to work but i want to but dont have any skill at hand.
i cant force him to give me my fees of college. and he even dont let me go out to find out any labour work.
really really confused is this is the willl of god that i should not work n be at home as a housewife whole life.

any suggestions please...........

Harry Haller

Panga Master
Jan 31, 2011
I am a mere novice, so my opinion is not with any authority, however, I disagree that as Sikhs we should just sit and accept the will of God. My understanding is that Hukam, the order of God and I mean that as in the order of things, rather than a direct command, requires us to try our hardest to better ourselves, as people, as human beings, as sons, as mothers, as wives, etc. I also believe that if we live life by giving our best, then the best possible outcome will be given to us. So I wish to buy a small farm one day and grow crops and raise animals, and I work hard towards that, if my hard work is rewarded with this wish, then great, if not, then that is ok too, I gave it my best but it was not to be, but the answer, for me anyway, is not to sit around and wait for Guru's kirpa to kick in, I have to work for it, my hardest, I have to earn it.

I sympathise with your situation, but you have to make your husband understand you are an individual with needs and goals, to better yourself is an absolute must for all of us, maybe there is some charity work you could do, a marriage is a compromise, if his beliefs are old school maybe you could between you work out some way that allows you to further your education an/or work that also keeps him happy too?

But as Sikhs, we should never give up and allow situations to wash over us, we should always have fight in us, always have the stomach for a challenge,

my opinion only


Mar 31, 2011
You are already married :shockedmunda:? What do you understand from Hukam the will of god? Explain Just sitting there and doing nothing is no option , in my eyes no hukam. You have to work for everything - like you have to work to find guru ji - it is work to keep rehat and so on..
Sikh is a learner(he has to fight (overcome lust, maya etc..)) in all views - and how can you learn if you do nothing? :)
Tell you husband - he will not refuse I guess. But maybe he will get hit in his ego? It´s everytime the same imagination that the man is the money earner and the women the houholder - but to reach god both have to work - just an example-


Dec 4, 2011
I think it's more about taking action with the opportunities the lord's Will/ Hukam lays in front of you.
Even those that feel they haven't been given or offered chances are actually looking a little too deep towards their desires.
I feel, we all are given different yet equal opportunities and chances.

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