• Welcome to all New Sikh Philosophy Network Forums!
    Explore Sikh Sikhi Sikhism...
    Sign up Log in

Desire To Become Good And True: But How?



I am a final year uni student who plans to do a Phd in engineering (yes I know what a fool!). I am not yet an amritdhari sikh but really want to become one but first I believe I need to become pure by removing my 5 evils before giving my head to the Guru. I do not feel right about going to my Guru with evils still trapped inside me.

I try to get up in the amritvela time because I know that this is the only time when His Sikhs arise to pray when everyone is asleep. But i find it really hard, my work is a lot and when my alarm goes off around 3am I just turn it off! I really want to become a sikh but my work and my 5 evils are taking control over me. I cannot really just quit my work because the western part of the world is designed with this in it. I know there are sikhs out there who are Gursikhs and are very well educated so I know that I can become a pure sikh whilst still learning. I do know that then i will not become fully detached, which is my ultimate dream, and one with the Guru until I give up this western ideal. But becoming a Sikh is a start to becoming detached. Waheguru!

Also even when I get up in the morning, once in a blue-moon, I do not do ishnaan since I do not wish to disturb the rest of the family who are asleep - which i know again is stupid! Wheres my will and confidence you ask? Stolen by the evils. How do you get it back?

I feel that because of my work my computer has become my third arm! But again I know i cannot just give up work. Any suggestions?


1947-2014 (Archived)
Notay ji

First things first. You need to calm down and be more relaxed within yourself. Self-blame will only get the way and it makes a person even more exhausted. A self-defeating thing.

I too am connected to the computer. I too have the 5 evils within me. For most of humanity the 5 evils are and will be constant companions. The effort first should be to bring them under control through your attachment to Gurbani. The more you are filled with love of the Guru, the less room there is for anything else so disturbing.

Sikhism is a religion for "householders" and for those who earn their living in honest ways. Can Waheguru do anything other than grace your studies in chardi kala? I don't think so.

My parting word -- amrit vela for you does not have to be 3 am in the morning. Carve out a few times during the day when you give yourself the gift of a short break. During those times quiet your mind, and treat yourself to the words of the Guru. if you do only 3 of the Banis instead of 5, that is a good thing. There is no stiff rule. Guruji says that a person remembers the name of the Lord even once, then Gurus kirpa will be given and felt.

ਏਕ ਨਿਮਖ ਜੋ ਸਿਮਰਨ ਮਹਿ ਜੀਆ ॥
eaek nimakh jo simaran mehi jeeaa ||
One who lives in meditative remembrance, even for an instant,

ਕੋਟਿ ਦਿਨਸ ਲਾਖ ਸਦਾ ਥਿਰੁ ਥੀਆ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥
kott dhinas laakh sadhaa thhir thheeaa ||1|| rehaao ||
lives for hundreds of thousands and millions of days, and becomes stable forever. ||1||Pause||

Guru Arjan Dev Ang 239


1947-2014 (Archived)
Notay ji

With all my heart I beg that you do not allow yourself to become so burdened that you cave in under the stress emotionally. There are many people who upon hearing that someone has a problem with meditation, nitnem, bani and bana are quick on the draw.

Your questions -- or the questions of anyone in your position -- are like a magnet. In the blink of an eye the answers show up on the forum laced with judgment. The authenticity of your plea and your situation is completely lost. The open, giving and forgiving embrace of the Gurus and Sikhism becomes clouded over. All that is left is the hard edge of uncompromising regulation of the human spirit.

Remember my words so that you do not lose the heart of Sikhism. Everything unfolds in time, progress is made in time, in accordance with His plan. Remain faithful in your heart and the Satguru will not abandon you.

(My note: The first one who would tell you this is Guruka Singh -- I know because I know him and he is not a judgmental person. His videos are to teach and not to put Sikhs on guilt-trips. There is nothing to feel guilty for.)

This statement by forum member, most respected VaheguruSeekr ji sums up an important insight. This way I see Nitnem. It is the daily planner of Piri so, one can conduct one's life of Miri based on it. If we just take a glance at our planner without knowing what has to be accomplished for the day, then the whole day is wasted, gone astray, directionless. As we have been doing the Nitnem in this manner for so many years, we can count the days on our abacuses.This is our life as adults and at the same time we also want our children to understand Gurbani, know Paath so they can become good Miri-Piri citizens since they start their kindergarten.

Now here comes the screaming thought from the head. Radical changes are needed and they can be done individually in the households so people who define/mold SRM can have some practical input because the main objective is to understand Gurbani and put it into practice.There is no other objective or any other goal than this.

His entire message can be viewed on another thread: See Post number 8, http://www.sikhism.us/sikh-sikhi-sikhism/14408-nitnem-banis-rushing-through-them.html


A big thank you to you both for kicking my back on track! :happy:
its nice to know that i can come here and ask questions which i know i will recieve replys from the gurbani - which is the true speech.
I have adopted a calmer approach, I try to read about sikhi whenever i get chance and watch the videos etc. to be honest i have been reading Bhai Sahib Randhir Singh's autobiography and i must say i am very inspired by his freedom acts and his character. Can you believe I am only on chapter six and i started reading sometime in december 08 - thats what work does.

I really liked how the balance observed by miri-piri can be brought into current affairs. One thing i couldn't understand is
"Radical changes are needed and they can be done individually in the households so people who define/mold SRM can have some practical input because the main objective is to understand Gurbani and put it into practice.There is no other objective or any other goal than this." quoted VaheguruSeekr ji

what is SRM? Am i missing something? WJKK WJKF!

By the way the first video on cold shower (ishnaan) doesnt appear to be present can someone check on their side please?

You are suffering from very common problems. We are all on the path. We are not perfect, but we do not need to be. Try reading the thread about "Rushing Through Nitnem", which aadji quoted from above.

Yogi Bhajan in one of his videos said that hearing the bani is immaculate where as saying it is purifying.
As it is in Anand Sahib:
"Sunte puneet kahte pavit"
Meaning - rushing through 5 banis without getting any spiritual food in your mind is fruitless. Rather, if you heard them - "Suniai sat santokh gian"



Notay Ji,

It is very simple.

(i) Ask yourself, what does good means to you. Then become one like that. Make your being to become what good means to you.

(ii) Ask yourself, what does true means to you. Then become one like that. Make your being to become what true means to you.

(iv) Having achieved it, go back to pont (i) above and repeat the same processes. By the end of one iteration, if you have evolved, then in biginning of each new iteration you will find that what you define as good and true will not be the same be of progressively of higher and higher level. This will be so because you are no longer the same person that you were at the biginning of the previous iteration. That is what I meant when I said you have to start from where you are; you are starting this iteration from a new level of evolution.

With many iteration of this process you will progessively become 'Good and Pure'.

This I am suggesting, because you have to start from where you are. like a child who is born, prgressively learns how to turn ove in the bed, then to sit, then to walk and then to run ----. It just do not strart running immidiately after the birth. The physical evolution is gradual in stages. Same is the case with spiritual evolution. One has to start from where one is and then gradually evolve.

In this process Jaap helps a lot. Repeat the words ' Satnam Waheguru' and hear the same, it helps in purifying and fucusing the mind.

You may try this. It takes time, but it certainly improve the person.

This I am saying from my own experience.

With love and respect for all.

Amarpal Singh