Atheist Son Of Sikh Parents Need Advice Asap

Discussion in 'Sikh Youth' started by mumsikh, May 24, 2018.

  1. mumsikh

    mumsikh SPNer

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    i am 18 years old, pursuing computer engineering in a well reputed college in mumbai. i have always had cool friends and supporting parents. but, i've never been a staunch believer in religion. i always find religion to be pointless, following what some person(s) said/wrote hundreds or thousands or years ago and having to follow their rules and the way they want us to lead our lives just doesn't seem right to me at all. i've been smoking weed since a year, and quite regularly. my grades are not affected by,and i've not been as irritable i was since a long time. i never intended to let my parents know about me smoking pot, but nowadays the paranoia associated with weed is taking over the better of me sometimes because of the guilt i feel hiding it from my parents. i have many friends who smoke weed and all of them are really nice people, so why should what i do in my personal life be associated with my morality?
    i really feel smoking weed isn't bad for me but i don't wanna live in hiding from my parents.
    i am a turbaned sikh and my parents are really good role models, just that i do not believe in the same things as me. is there any way i can come off to them and tell them about me smoking the jane?
     
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  3. Tejwant Singh

    Tejwant Singh Mentor Writer SPNer

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    OK. So, what's your point?
    How can we be of any help?
     
  4. mumsikh

    mumsikh SPNer

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    my point is what do y'all sikhs on this forum think about being in my parents' shoes and what do you think is wrong in what i am doing. i really just want to start a dialogue with my parents on this but i don't really understand sikhism, so i wanna know know another sikh's point of view
     
  5. Tejwant Singh

    Tejwant Singh Mentor Writer SPNer

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    We do not judge anyone here. This is between you and your parents. I have no idea if all the Atheists smoke weed. You have to learn how to manage and conduct your life in a fruitful manner for your own sake. Sikhi has nothing to do with your situation.
     
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  6. sukhsingh

    sukhsingh Writer SPNer

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    Bro I don't understand the problem?
    You have a disconnect between your views and your parents.. But that is not what you are actually talking about.
    You seem to be unhappy about the conflict between the way you live and the way you project yourself vis a vis your parents..
    You make some interesting points
    1. You don't believe in religion because it was written hundreds of years ago... Just think about that.
    You are a computer engineer in training, so must therefore believe in rational logical thought, mathematics all of which are predicated on a body of knowledge developed over thousands of years

    2. You seem to be saying that your parents don't understand you.
    What have you done to articulate your feelings?
    Seems like you don't want to challenge the status quo.. If that is your truth then what you scared of
     
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  7. RicktheSikh

    RicktheSikh Writer SPNer

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    Be brave tell the truth
     
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  8. ActsOfGod

    ActsOfGod Writer SPNer

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    My recommendation is that you take some time and learn about Sikhism. Treat this project like any other class you might take in college. Take it seriously, devote some time regularly (e.g. an hour a day) and be diligent and earnest and focused, and learn about Sikhi. It is true what you state, that you don't really understand Sikhism. I will daresay that all your problems stem from this ignorance.

    A little spoiler here: it's not what you think it is.

    All the best for your future. Guru Sahib kirpa karan!
    [AoG]
     
  9. Sikhilove

    Sikhilove Writer SPNer

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    Weed has negative effects on a human if taken as an intoxicant. It ruins lives, relationships, jobs etc.

    Of course you should stop, but it's up to you, we're free to do what we want.
     
  10. Udassee

    Udassee SPNer

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    Marijuana, for a minority of people who use it, causes paranoia. It also causes erectile dysfunction.

    Anyway, the idea in Sikh dharm is that the body is the temple of God, the home of the soul. As such, it should be kept pure and treated with respect. Marijuana is harmful to the body and mind, which is proven beyond doubt through numerous scientific studies, and thus immoral b/c it disrespects the gift of the body that God has given you. This body is ours to use for this life, but it does not belong to us. IF it belonged to us, we could take it with us when we die.

    As for the atheism, if I were in your shoes I would learn how to do simran on mool mantr or Bani and try to do it everyday. It will make you chilled out in life like weed used to, but the feeling will be a little different. You won't lose your hosh (clarity of thought), and you won't damage your body either. Over time, you may feel a greater desire to connect with God.

    I was atheist and also a weed smoker during part of university. I encourage you to never give up on your search for truth and you will see that life can be beautiful without drugs.
     
  11. chetan sharma

    chetan sharma SPNer

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    In Sikhism only tobacco is prohibited ( for non Amritdhari Sikh) So still you didn’t do anything wrong according to Sikhism..
    but as a son, civilian what you did is wrong.. your parents will surely heartbroken if you tell them .. my advice stop drugs these are addicting.. and better “agar nasha hi karna ha to Guru ki Bani ka Karo”
     
  12. Tejwant Singh

    Tejwant Singh Mentor Writer SPNer

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    Firstly, are you trying to imply that Tobacco is fine for the Amritdhari Sikhs? And what didn't he do wrong a per Sikhi as per you?
     
  13. chetan sharma

    chetan sharma SPNer

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    Bro I am talking about non Amrit dhari sikhs we all know many things prohibited for Amrit dhari Sikh.. and how can you think which is prohibited for non Amritdhari Sikh is allowed to amritdhari Sikh..
     
  14. chetan sharma

    chetan sharma SPNer

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    Smoking marijuana.. which is plant not tobacco.. mean taking sukha in any foam (bhang) is not prohibited for non Amritdhari Sikh .. so he didn’t do anything wrong as per sikhi..
     
  15. Tejwant Singh

    Tejwant Singh Mentor Writer SPNer

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    But first you said-
    so, please clarify which is what above.

    Secondly, any mind altering thing is a big NO in Sikhi unless taken as a medicine.
     
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  16. chetan sharma

    chetan sharma SPNer

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    In Sikhism only tobacco is prohibited (for non Amritdhari sikhs ) ... till now he said he only smoke bhang so he did nothing wrong as per Sikhism.. It’s very clear written .. if you have some other translation of it please enlighten me

    Second bro where it is written mind altering is prohibited..
     
    Last edited: Jul 2, 2018
  17. Tejwant Singh

    Tejwant Singh Mentor Writer SPNer

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    As mentioned before, SGGS, our only Guru gives us the tools to develop the inner manifestation in us to know what is good for us and what is not.
    Common sense does not need to be dictated. It is a self-learning process with the help of SGGS, our only Guru, in this case.
     
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  18. dalvindersingh grewal

    dalvindersingh grewal Writer Historian SPNer

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    Please study the philosophy of the Gurus from Sri Guru Granth Sahib and other sources and then relate to your life. You will find that Guru's philosophy is very useful for even day to day living. Do not worry of rituals. These are secondary. Once you understand and realise practically the philosophy you will proceed further with Sikhism. Sikhism is a way of life and adopt it as such.
     
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  19. gjsingh

    gjsingh SPNer

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    If you absolutely must take cannabis, for God's sake take it as a drink or food or vapor instead of smoking it! Protect your lungs!
     
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  20. Inderjeet Kaur

    Inderjeet Kaur Writer SPNer Supporter

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    1. Tobacco in any form is taboo for Amritdhari Sikhs. Other Sikhs are very strongly encouraged not to use tobacco.
    2. Sikhi aside, your body is designed to breathe air. Any kind of smoke, whether from tobacco, marijuana, barbecue, house fire, air pollution, or anything else is bad for your lungs and hence the rest of your body.
    3. Lying causes paranoia...but maybe yours is not really paranoia. Maybe it's fear. Are you afraid of being kicked out or of hurting their feelings or what?
    4. I remember when I was 18. It's a tough age, just on the edge of adulthood. I remember a song that was popular at that time, a sort of conversation between a father and son, called Father And Son. Maybe you'll find it helpful. Maybe not. Anyway, here it is.
     
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