☀️ JOIN SPN MOBILE
Forums
New posts
Guru Granth Sahib
Composition, Arrangement & Layout
ਜਪੁ | Jup
ਸੋ ਦਰੁ | So Dar
ਸੋਹਿਲਾ | Sohilaa
ਰਾਗੁ ਸਿਰੀਰਾਗੁ | Raag Siree-Raag
Gurbani (14-53)
Ashtpadiyan (53-71)
Gurbani (71-74)
Pahre (74-78)
Chhant (78-81)
Vanjara (81-82)
Vaar Siri Raag (83-91)
Bhagat Bani (91-93)
ਰਾਗੁ ਮਾਝ | Raag Maajh
Gurbani (94-109)
Ashtpadi (109)
Ashtpadiyan (110-129)
Ashtpadi (129-130)
Ashtpadiyan (130-133)
Bara Maha (133-136)
Din Raen (136-137)
Vaar Maajh Ki (137-150)
ਰਾਗੁ ਗਉੜੀ | Raag Gauree
Gurbani (151-185)
Quartets/Couplets (185-220)
Ashtpadiyan (220-234)
Karhalei (234-235)
Ashtpadiyan (235-242)
Chhant (242-249)
Baavan Akhari (250-262)
Sukhmani (262-296)
Thittee (296-300)
Gauree kii Vaar (300-323)
Gurbani (323-330)
Ashtpadiyan (330-340)
Baavan Akhari (340-343)
Thintteen (343-344)
Vaar Kabir (344-345)
Bhagat Bani (345-346)
ਰਾਗੁ ਆਸਾ | Raag Aasaa
Gurbani (347-348)
Chaupaday (348-364)
Panchpadde (364-365)
Kaafee (365-409)
Aasaavaree (409-411)
Ashtpadiyan (411-432)
Patee (432-435)
Chhant (435-462)
Vaar Aasaa (462-475)
Bhagat Bani (475-488)
ਰਾਗੁ ਗੂਜਰੀ | Raag Goojaree
Gurbani (489-503)
Ashtpadiyan (503-508)
Vaar Gujari (508-517)
Vaar Gujari (517-526)
ਰਾਗੁ ਦੇਵਗੰਧਾਰੀ | Raag Dayv-Gandhaaree
Gurbani (527-536)
ਰਾਗੁ ਬਿਹਾਗੜਾ | Raag Bihaagraa
Gurbani (537-556)
Chhant (538-548)
Vaar Bihaagraa (548-556)
ਰਾਗੁ ਵਡਹੰਸ | Raag Wadhans
Gurbani (557-564)
Ashtpadiyan (564-565)
Chhant (565-575)
Ghoriaan (575-578)
Alaahaniiaa (578-582)
Vaar Wadhans (582-594)
ਰਾਗੁ ਸੋਰਠਿ | Raag Sorath
Gurbani (595-634)
Asatpadhiya (634-642)
Vaar Sorath (642-659)
ਰਾਗੁ ਧਨਾਸਰੀ | Raag Dhanasaree
Gurbani (660-685)
Astpadhiya (685-687)
Chhant (687-691)
Bhagat Bani (691-695)
ਰਾਗੁ ਜੈਤਸਰੀ | Raag Jaitsree
Gurbani (696-703)
Chhant (703-705)
Vaar Jaitsaree (705-710)
Bhagat Bani (710)
ਰਾਗੁ ਟੋਡੀ | Raag Todee
ਰਾਗੁ ਬੈਰਾੜੀ | Raag Bairaaree
ਰਾਗੁ ਤਿਲੰਗ | Raag Tilang
Gurbani (721-727)
Bhagat Bani (727)
ਰਾਗੁ ਸੂਹੀ | Raag Suhi
Gurbani (728-750)
Ashtpadiyan (750-761)
Kaafee (761-762)
Suchajee (762)
Gunvantee (763)
Chhant (763-785)
Vaar Soohee (785-792)
Bhagat Bani (792-794)
ਰਾਗੁ ਬਿਲਾਵਲੁ | Raag Bilaaval
Gurbani (795-831)
Ashtpadiyan (831-838)
Thitteen (838-840)
Vaar Sat (841-843)
Chhant (843-848)
Vaar Bilaaval (849-855)
Bhagat Bani (855-858)
ਰਾਗੁ ਗੋਂਡ | Raag Gond
Gurbani (859-869)
Ashtpadiyan (869)
Bhagat Bani (870-875)
ਰਾਗੁ ਰਾਮਕਲੀ | Raag Ramkalee
Ashtpadiyan (902-916)
Gurbani (876-902)
Anand (917-922)
Sadd (923-924)
Chhant (924-929)
Dakhnee (929-938)
Sidh Gosat (938-946)
Vaar Ramkalee (947-968)
ਰਾਗੁ ਨਟ ਨਾਰਾਇਨ | Raag Nat Narayan
Gurbani (975-980)
Ashtpadiyan (980-983)
ਰਾਗੁ ਮਾਲੀ ਗਉੜਾ | Raag Maalee Gauraa
Gurbani (984-988)
Bhagat Bani (988)
ਰਾਗੁ ਮਾਰੂ | Raag Maaroo
Gurbani (889-1008)
Ashtpadiyan (1008-1014)
Kaafee (1014-1016)
Ashtpadiyan (1016-1019)
Anjulian (1019-1020)
Solhe (1020-1033)
Dakhni (1033-1043)
ਰਾਗੁ ਤੁਖਾਰੀ | Raag Tukhaari
Bara Maha (1107-1110)
Chhant (1110-1117)
ਰਾਗੁ ਕੇਦਾਰਾ | Raag Kedara
Gurbani (1118-1123)
Bhagat Bani (1123-1124)
ਰਾਗੁ ਭੈਰਉ | Raag Bhairo
Gurbani (1125-1152)
Partaal (1153)
Ashtpadiyan (1153-1167)
ਰਾਗੁ ਬਸੰਤੁ | Raag Basant
Gurbani (1168-1187)
Ashtpadiyan (1187-1193)
Vaar Basant (1193-1196)
ਰਾਗੁ ਸਾਰਗ | Raag Saarag
Gurbani (1197-1200)
Partaal (1200-1231)
Ashtpadiyan (1232-1236)
Chhant (1236-1237)
Vaar Saarang (1237-1253)
ਰਾਗੁ ਮਲਾਰ | Raag Malaar
Gurbani (1254-1293)
Partaal (1265-1273)
Ashtpadiyan (1273-1278)
Chhant (1278)
Vaar Malaar (1278-91)
Bhagat Bani (1292-93)
ਰਾਗੁ ਕਾਨੜਾ | Raag Kaanraa
Gurbani (1294-96)
Partaal (1296-1318)
Ashtpadiyan (1308-1312)
Chhant (1312)
Vaar Kaanraa
Bhagat Bani (1318)
ਰਾਗੁ ਕਲਿਆਨ | Raag Kalyaan
Gurbani (1319-23)
Ashtpadiyan (1323-26)
ਰਾਗੁ ਪ੍ਰਭਾਤੀ | Raag Prabhaatee
Gurbani (1327-1341)
Ashtpadiyan (1342-51)
ਰਾਗੁ ਜੈਜਾਵੰਤੀ | Raag Jaijaiwanti
Gurbani (1352-53)
Salok | Gatha | Phunahe | Chaubole | Swayiye
Sehskritee Mahala 1
Sehskritee Mahala 5
Gaathaa Mahala 5
Phunhay Mahala 5
Chaubolae Mahala 5
Shaloks Bhagat Kabir
Shaloks Sheikh Farid
Swaiyyae Mahala 5
Swaiyyae in Praise of Gurus
Shaloks in Addition To Vaars
Shalok Ninth Mehl
Mundavanee Mehl 5
ਰਾਗ ਮਾਲਾ, Raag Maalaa
What's new
New posts
New media
New media comments
New resources
Latest activity
Videos
New media
New comments
Library
Latest reviews
Donate
Log in
Register
What's new
New posts
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Welcome to all New Sikh Philosophy Network Forums!
Explore Sikh Sikhi Sikhism...
Sign up
Log in
Social Lounge
Relationships
Love & Marriage
Muslim Girl-Sikh Boy Marriage Problems- Please Help!
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Aisha" data-source="post: 175258" data-attributes="member: 18783"><p>I didn't think that it was necessary to bore you with the petty little arguments and details, hence me not posting in 2 weeks (and I've only really had time to log in and check my messages) but I felt it fitting to type out an update in case anyone was wondering what's been going on.</p><p></p><p></p><p>Like planned, my mom did meet his dad. And, as we had hoped, it was a very diplomatic conversation. No rudeness or insults or accusations were thrown around, something that definitely would have happened if my dad and his mom were involved. His dad was cool the entire time and didn't care about me being Muslim at all. His biggest concern was what the implications of me marrying his son would be for our family. He was worried that it would result in me getting disowned. My mom reassured him that nothing of the sort was on her mind but she couldn't say the same for my father. She told my BF's dad that there were 2 reasons that my father was against this marriage (and she had the same troubles as well, just to a lesser degree):</p><p></p><p>a) Muslim women are not allowed to marry non-Muslim men</p><p>b) It would shame her family</p><p></p><p>They spent a lot of time talking about the second one. My BF's dad gave her his opinion, that society was always going to talk about one thing or another; if his son did end up marrying a Sikh girl, then someone somewhere would be going on about how she is too tall or too short, about how she is from a bad pind (village), or maybe how the sari she wore to that one relatives party was a bad color. In other words, it would be impossible to please everyone and someone was always going to talk. And it would be the exact same for her daughter (me), whether I got married to a Muslim or non-Muslim. I could tell that it was sinking in and that she agreed with him. Even though she was worried about what people might say, she acknowledged that her children's happiness was more important than the opinions of outsiders.</p><p></p><p>As for the other one, his dad guaranteed her religion did not matter one iota and that he was so very proud that his son and I were, like mature compromising adults, able to come to an agreement on how to handle our differences in faith and that she had his word that no one, not even his wife, would interfere in our arrangement if this marriage does take place.</p><p></p><p>That was most of the meeting. My mom felt a lot more comfortable about the idea after it was over, I could tell. My dad knew that this was taking place and had sent her there with the orders of "ending the entire thing", so you can imagine how p*ssed off he was when she came home and told him that he needs to calm down and not reject my BF just because he isn't Muslim and that she thinks it's a good idea. The past week has pretty much been her trying to cool him off and find a way to make him understand. It feels like there is a rift in the family, like there are two camps- my sister, my mom and I against my father and my two brothers. I have done my utmost best to talk to my brothers but they are constantly dwelling on how on earth they are "going to explain to their "brothers" at the Mosque that their sister is marrying out of the religion". We used to have a really nice relationship, I could count on them all the time, heck I even expected them to be on my side before my mom but I never thought that they would be this shallow and this swollen with pride and concerned about "izzat".</p><p></p><p></p><p>Since last week my mother has met my boyfriend on one other occasion and I am honestly so relieved that he is constantly able to make such a good impression with her! He's lucky that he's an effortless smooth talker <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite6" alt=":cool:" title="Cool :cool:" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":cool:" /></p><p>One thing he did, that we hadn't talked about prior to him meeting my mom, was that he invited the two of us to go with him to the Gurdwara (not the far away one that he's taken me to before, but the one right by his house). Everyone, from the sewa people to the really religious men and women and the elders knows who he is there because he is a regular volunteer and is actively involved in any and all Gurdwara events. Since both families already know, there is no reason in hiding it from anyone. He offered to go to the Mosque with me and my mom in exchange. She agreed to go the the Gurdwara because she had questions for the priests (I'm sorry I don't know the real word for the people who perform the religious rituals in Sikhism). But she told him that he didn't need to go to the Mosque, that it was fine. I suspect that she isn't ready for everyone there to know about this yet, or she is afraid of what my father would do if we went and his buddies ended up finding out about his daughter's non-Muslim boyfriend. So my mum and I will go with my BF in a few days, and he is keeping it a secret from his mom because she would most definitely not want me to be seen there with him by anyone and so would start an argument with him. My father will be kept in the dark because he would wreak havoc if he knew.</p><p></p><p></p><p>So just a little (looks a lot longer now!) update for anyone who wanted to know what was up.</p><p></p><p></p><p>PS: I caught my brothers red-handed discussing with each other about ways in which they could find my BF. I have warned them about what will happen if they go out looking for trouble and hope they listen to me. My boyfriend does now have pictures of my brothers and so hopefully will not be approached unknowingly, although he continues to joke about the situation and does not seem to be taking it as seriously as I am, telling me that he is not worried about my brothers. I pray that it is only because of the culture and him not wanting to show fear and that he does actually understand the gravity of the matter.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Aisha, post: 175258, member: 18783"] I didn't think that it was necessary to bore you with the petty little arguments and details, hence me not posting in 2 weeks (and I've only really had time to log in and check my messages) but I felt it fitting to type out an update in case anyone was wondering what's been going on. Like planned, my mom did meet his dad. And, as we had hoped, it was a very diplomatic conversation. No rudeness or insults or accusations were thrown around, something that definitely would have happened if my dad and his mom were involved. His dad was cool the entire time and didn't care about me being Muslim at all. His biggest concern was what the implications of me marrying his son would be for our family. He was worried that it would result in me getting disowned. My mom reassured him that nothing of the sort was on her mind but she couldn't say the same for my father. She told my BF's dad that there were 2 reasons that my father was against this marriage (and she had the same troubles as well, just to a lesser degree): a) Muslim women are not allowed to marry non-Muslim men b) It would shame her family They spent a lot of time talking about the second one. My BF's dad gave her his opinion, that society was always going to talk about one thing or another; if his son did end up marrying a Sikh girl, then someone somewhere would be going on about how she is too tall or too short, about how she is from a bad pind (village), or maybe how the sari she wore to that one relatives party was a bad color. In other words, it would be impossible to please everyone and someone was always going to talk. And it would be the exact same for her daughter (me), whether I got married to a Muslim or non-Muslim. I could tell that it was sinking in and that she agreed with him. Even though she was worried about what people might say, she acknowledged that her children's happiness was more important than the opinions of outsiders. As for the other one, his dad guaranteed her religion did not matter one iota and that he was so very proud that his son and I were, like mature compromising adults, able to come to an agreement on how to handle our differences in faith and that she had his word that no one, not even his wife, would interfere in our arrangement if this marriage does take place. That was most of the meeting. My mom felt a lot more comfortable about the idea after it was over, I could tell. My dad knew that this was taking place and had sent her there with the orders of "ending the entire thing", so you can imagine how p*ssed off he was when she came home and told him that he needs to calm down and not reject my BF just because he isn't Muslim and that she thinks it's a good idea. The past week has pretty much been her trying to cool him off and find a way to make him understand. It feels like there is a rift in the family, like there are two camps- my sister, my mom and I against my father and my two brothers. I have done my utmost best to talk to my brothers but they are constantly dwelling on how on earth they are "going to explain to their "brothers" at the Mosque that their sister is marrying out of the religion". We used to have a really nice relationship, I could count on them all the time, heck I even expected them to be on my side before my mom but I never thought that they would be this shallow and this swollen with pride and concerned about "izzat". Since last week my mother has met my boyfriend on one other occasion and I am honestly so relieved that he is constantly able to make such a good impression with her! He's lucky that he's an effortless smooth talker :cool: One thing he did, that we hadn't talked about prior to him meeting my mom, was that he invited the two of us to go with him to the Gurdwara (not the far away one that he's taken me to before, but the one right by his house). Everyone, from the sewa people to the really religious men and women and the elders knows who he is there because he is a regular volunteer and is actively involved in any and all Gurdwara events. Since both families already know, there is no reason in hiding it from anyone. He offered to go to the Mosque with me and my mom in exchange. She agreed to go the the Gurdwara because she had questions for the priests (I'm sorry I don't know the real word for the people who perform the religious rituals in Sikhism). But she told him that he didn't need to go to the Mosque, that it was fine. I suspect that she isn't ready for everyone there to know about this yet, or she is afraid of what my father would do if we went and his buddies ended up finding out about his daughter's non-Muslim boyfriend. So my mum and I will go with my BF in a few days, and he is keeping it a secret from his mom because she would most definitely not want me to be seen there with him by anyone and so would start an argument with him. My father will be kept in the dark because he would wreak havoc if he knew. So just a little (looks a lot longer now!) update for anyone who wanted to know what was up. PS: I caught my brothers red-handed discussing with each other about ways in which they could find my BF. I have warned them about what will happen if they go out looking for trouble and hope they listen to me. My boyfriend does now have pictures of my brothers and so hopefully will not be approached unknowingly, although he continues to joke about the situation and does not seem to be taking it as seriously as I am, telling me that he is not worried about my brothers. I pray that it is only because of the culture and him not wanting to show fear and that he does actually understand the gravity of the matter. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Social Lounge
Relationships
Love & Marriage
Muslim Girl-Sikh Boy Marriage Problems- Please Help!
This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
Accept
Learn more…
Top