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ਜਪੁ | Jup
ਸੋ ਦਰੁ | So Dar
ਸੋਹਿਲਾ | Sohilaa
ਰਾਗੁ ਸਿਰੀਰਾਗੁ | Raag Siree-Raag
Gurbani (14-53)
Ashtpadiyan (53-71)
Gurbani (71-74)
Pahre (74-78)
Chhant (78-81)
Vanjara (81-82)
Vaar Siri Raag (83-91)
Bhagat Bani (91-93)
ਰਾਗੁ ਮਾਝ | Raag Maajh
Gurbani (94-109)
Ashtpadi (109)
Ashtpadiyan (110-129)
Ashtpadi (129-130)
Ashtpadiyan (130-133)
Bara Maha (133-136)
Din Raen (136-137)
Vaar Maajh Ki (137-150)
ਰਾਗੁ ਗਉੜੀ | Raag Gauree
Gurbani (151-185)
Quartets/Couplets (185-220)
Ashtpadiyan (220-234)
Karhalei (234-235)
Ashtpadiyan (235-242)
Chhant (242-249)
Baavan Akhari (250-262)
Sukhmani (262-296)
Thittee (296-300)
Gauree kii Vaar (300-323)
Gurbani (323-330)
Ashtpadiyan (330-340)
Baavan Akhari (340-343)
Thintteen (343-344)
Vaar Kabir (344-345)
Bhagat Bani (345-346)
ਰਾਗੁ ਆਸਾ | Raag Aasaa
Gurbani (347-348)
Chaupaday (348-364)
Panchpadde (364-365)
Kaafee (365-409)
Aasaavaree (409-411)
Ashtpadiyan (411-432)
Patee (432-435)
Chhant (435-462)
Vaar Aasaa (462-475)
Bhagat Bani (475-488)
ਰਾਗੁ ਗੂਜਰੀ | Raag Goojaree
Gurbani (489-503)
Ashtpadiyan (503-508)
Vaar Gujari (508-517)
Vaar Gujari (517-526)
ਰਾਗੁ ਦੇਵਗੰਧਾਰੀ | Raag Dayv-Gandhaaree
Gurbani (527-536)
ਰਾਗੁ ਬਿਹਾਗੜਾ | Raag Bihaagraa
Gurbani (537-556)
Chhant (538-548)
Vaar Bihaagraa (548-556)
ਰਾਗੁ ਵਡਹੰਸ | Raag Wadhans
Gurbani (557-564)
Ashtpadiyan (564-565)
Chhant (565-575)
Ghoriaan (575-578)
Alaahaniiaa (578-582)
Vaar Wadhans (582-594)
ਰਾਗੁ ਸੋਰਠਿ | Raag Sorath
Gurbani (595-634)
Asatpadhiya (634-642)
Vaar Sorath (642-659)
ਰਾਗੁ ਧਨਾਸਰੀ | Raag Dhanasaree
Gurbani (660-685)
Astpadhiya (685-687)
Chhant (687-691)
Bhagat Bani (691-695)
ਰਾਗੁ ਜੈਤਸਰੀ | Raag Jaitsree
Gurbani (696-703)
Chhant (703-705)
Vaar Jaitsaree (705-710)
Bhagat Bani (710)
ਰਾਗੁ ਟੋਡੀ | Raag Todee
ਰਾਗੁ ਬੈਰਾੜੀ | Raag Bairaaree
ਰਾਗੁ ਤਿਲੰਗ | Raag Tilang
Gurbani (721-727)
Bhagat Bani (727)
ਰਾਗੁ ਸੂਹੀ | Raag Suhi
Gurbani (728-750)
Ashtpadiyan (750-761)
Kaafee (761-762)
Suchajee (762)
Gunvantee (763)
Chhant (763-785)
Vaar Soohee (785-792)
Bhagat Bani (792-794)
ਰਾਗੁ ਬਿਲਾਵਲੁ | Raag Bilaaval
Gurbani (795-831)
Ashtpadiyan (831-838)
Thitteen (838-840)
Vaar Sat (841-843)
Chhant (843-848)
Vaar Bilaaval (849-855)
Bhagat Bani (855-858)
ਰਾਗੁ ਗੋਂਡ | Raag Gond
Gurbani (859-869)
Ashtpadiyan (869)
Bhagat Bani (870-875)
ਰਾਗੁ ਰਾਮਕਲੀ | Raag Ramkalee
Ashtpadiyan (902-916)
Gurbani (876-902)
Anand (917-922)
Sadd (923-924)
Chhant (924-929)
Dakhnee (929-938)
Sidh Gosat (938-946)
Vaar Ramkalee (947-968)
ਰਾਗੁ ਨਟ ਨਾਰਾਇਨ | Raag Nat Narayan
Gurbani (975-980)
Ashtpadiyan (980-983)
ਰਾਗੁ ਮਾਲੀ ਗਉੜਾ | Raag Maalee Gauraa
Gurbani (984-988)
Bhagat Bani (988)
ਰਾਗੁ ਮਾਰੂ | Raag Maaroo
Gurbani (889-1008)
Ashtpadiyan (1008-1014)
Kaafee (1014-1016)
Ashtpadiyan (1016-1019)
Anjulian (1019-1020)
Solhe (1020-1033)
Dakhni (1033-1043)
ਰਾਗੁ ਤੁਖਾਰੀ | Raag Tukhaari
Bara Maha (1107-1110)
Chhant (1110-1117)
ਰਾਗੁ ਕੇਦਾਰਾ | Raag Kedara
Gurbani (1118-1123)
Bhagat Bani (1123-1124)
ਰਾਗੁ ਭੈਰਉ | Raag Bhairo
Gurbani (1125-1152)
Partaal (1153)
Ashtpadiyan (1153-1167)
ਰਾਗੁ ਬਸੰਤੁ | Raag Basant
Gurbani (1168-1187)
Ashtpadiyan (1187-1193)
Vaar Basant (1193-1196)
ਰਾਗੁ ਸਾਰਗ | Raag Saarag
Gurbani (1197-1200)
Partaal (1200-1231)
Ashtpadiyan (1232-1236)
Chhant (1236-1237)
Vaar Saarang (1237-1253)
ਰਾਗੁ ਮਲਾਰ | Raag Malaar
Gurbani (1254-1293)
Partaal (1265-1273)
Ashtpadiyan (1273-1278)
Chhant (1278)
Vaar Malaar (1278-91)
Bhagat Bani (1292-93)
ਰਾਗੁ ਕਾਨੜਾ | Raag Kaanraa
Gurbani (1294-96)
Partaal (1296-1318)
Ashtpadiyan (1308-1312)
Chhant (1312)
Vaar Kaanraa
Bhagat Bani (1318)
ਰਾਗੁ ਕਲਿਆਨ | Raag Kalyaan
Gurbani (1319-23)
Ashtpadiyan (1323-26)
ਰਾਗੁ ਪ੍ਰਭਾਤੀ | Raag Prabhaatee
Gurbani (1327-1341)
Ashtpadiyan (1342-51)
ਰਾਗੁ ਜੈਜਾਵੰਤੀ | Raag Jaijaiwanti
Gurbani (1352-53)
Salok | Gatha | Phunahe | Chaubole | Swayiye
Sehskritee Mahala 1
Sehskritee Mahala 5
Gaathaa Mahala 5
Phunhay Mahala 5
Chaubolae Mahala 5
Shaloks Bhagat Kabir
Shaloks Sheikh Farid
Swaiyyae Mahala 5
Swaiyyae in Praise of Gurus
Shaloks in Addition To Vaars
Shalok Ninth Mehl
Mundavanee Mehl 5
ਰਾਗ ਮਾਲਾ, Raag Maalaa
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Importance Of Children
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<blockquote data-quote="Archived_Member16" data-source="post: 57315" data-attributes="member: 884"><p><strong><span style="color: red">FOOD FOR THOUGHT on the "Importance of Children":</span></strong></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000080">Your children are not your children.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000080">They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000080">They come through you but not from you, </span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000080">and though they are with you, and yet they belong not to you.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000080">You may give them your love, but not your thoughts. </span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000080">For they have their own thoughts.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000080">You may house their bodies but not their souls, </span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000080">for their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000080">You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. </span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000080">For life goes not backward, nor tarries with yesterday. </span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000080">- Kahlil Gibran</span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><strong><span style="color: #000080">______________________________________________________________________</span></strong></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><strong><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000080">What Our Children Need </span></span></strong></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">They need us to CHERISH every minute with them, </span>[/FONT][/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">For tomorrow may be too late. </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">They need us to HUG them, </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">So they know they are important to us. </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">They need us to show INTEREST in what they do, </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">All they want is approval. </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">They need us to LISTEN to what they say, </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">Remembering they are our future. </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">They need us to DREAM with them, </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">Because this how they find where they want to be in life. </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">They need us to RESPECT them, </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">Because this is how they learn to care about others. </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">They need us to ENCOURAGE them. </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">Because this is how they become the best that they can. </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">They need us to NURTURE them, </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">Because the world can be a harsh place. </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-size: 10px">[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="color: #000080">AND WE ARE THEIR SHELTER FROM HARM! </span>[/FONT]</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px">[/FONT]</span> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="color: #6600ff"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="color: #6600ff"><em><strong><span style="color: #000080">- Robin Lea Black</span></strong></em> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="color: #6600ff">______________________________________________________________________________________</span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'MS Serif'"><span style="color: navy"><strong> <u><span style="font-size: 18px">Every Child Needs</span></u> </strong></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><strong><span style="font-family: 'MS Serif'"><span style="color: navy"><u>1) Unconditional Love:</u> physical and emotional warmth and closeness, through both good times and bad. In conjunction with an enduring sense of trust from both sides, unconditional love forms the foundation for a lifelong, mutually respectful, nurturing relationship between parent and child.</span></span></strong></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'MS Serif'"><span style="color: navy"><u><strong>2)</strong> </u><strong><u>Validation:</u> affirmation for a child's thoughts, feelings, ideas, efforts, and especially for his or her individuality as a human being. Validation begins with a parent's highly attuned attention. Through generous praise, recognition, appreciation, hugs, pats on the back, and so forth, a child comes to feel as though his or her feelings truly matter within the family unit. Feeling solidly supported by our families during childhood is the primary mechanism for the formation of healthy self-esteem in human beings. </strong></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'MS Serif'"><span style="color: navy"><u><strong>3)</strong> </u><strong><u>Structure:</u>an environment of "healthy limits" in which a child can grow and thrive. Good structure for children is a matter of balance. In order for them to feel emotionally secure and yet still have the freedom to grow, children need to experience age-appropriate, continually expanding boundaries as they mature. Nonoppressive, sometimes negotiable (where appropriate) limits are enforced with compassionate discipline, the ultimate goal being to teach children the arts of self-discipline and self-motivation.</strong></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'MS Serif'"><span style="color: navy"><u><strong>4)</strong> <strong>Understanding:</strong></u><strong> a child gains emotional security from knowing that he or she can make mistakes (even the mistake of behaving badly) without being shamed or degraded with excessive parental anger or harsh punishment. In this type of nurturing family system, parents understand that mistakes are an integral part of the learning process, and that children learn life's lessons more fully when they are guided with an "empathetic hand."</strong></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><strong><span style="font-family: 'MS Serif'"><span style="color: navy"><u>5) Healthy Modeling:</u> consistent parental examples of emotional wholeness. We parents must show our children the way toward balance in life by modeling such things as emotional generosity toward others, calm and effective problem-solving skills (particularly in our dealings with them), healthy coping strategies in regard to our own daily stresses, and the ability to set goals and sustain our efforts in achieving them. For better or worse, our parental behavior is the most powerful life teacher for our children.</span></span></strong></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><strong><span style="font-family: 'MS Serif'"><span style="color: navy"><u>6) </u><u>Challenge:</u> age-appropriate incentives for a child to learn life's emotional and practical lessons at each developmental stage. In order to bolster our children's ability to problem-solve and achieve their goals, their minds need to be stimulated by learning new skills and overcoming obstacles. As we parents offer our children a wide variety of subject matter to explore, our use of encouragement and praise is key in sustaining their desire to master their world.</span></span></strong></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><strong> </strong></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><strong></strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'MS Serif'"><span style="color: navy"><u>7) Inclusion:</u> a sense of belonging to the family group, and to the community at large. A healthy attachment to the primary caregiver in childhood is the first way that children learn to feel like welcome and valuable members of the family group. This core sense of belonging is what enables children to move confidently into the world, and reach out to others in a spirit of good will and camaraderie. It is important for them to experience the satisfaction of having other people depend on them, as well, which is taught in the home by having each child be responsible for important family duties. In this way, our children will learn to be responsible to themselves, to their families, and to society. </span></span></strong></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'MS Serif'"><span style="color: navy"><strong>When a child's developmental needs are met, he or she will naturally begin to experience:</strong></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'MS Serif'"><span style="color: navy"><u><strong>Healthy Self-Esteem</strong>:</u><strong> core feelings of self-acceptance, self-confidence, and self-respect as an individual. A child develops healthy self-esteem when his or her feelings, ideas, and achievements are accepted, valued, and supported within the family unit over the long term. Unlike arrogance - which is often a coping mechanism for covering up underlying feelings of worthlessness - healthy self-esteem is the keystone to understanding, respecting, and valuing others.</strong></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'MS Serif'"><span style="color: navy"><u><strong>Self-Actualization</strong>:</u><strong> a child's growing recognition of his or her unique thoughts and abilities throughout the maturation process. The prime goal of parenting is to prepare our children for independence in adulthood. We parents must therefore consistently encourage our children's journey toward autonomy, so they can learn to thrive "without us," emotionally, materially, and spiritually.</strong></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><strong><span style="color: navy">source:</span></strong> <a href="http://www.living-library.com/HeartMates/needs.htm" target="_blank"><u><span style="color: #810081">http://www.living-library.com/HeartMates/needs.htm</span></u></a></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Archived_Member16, post: 57315, member: 884"] [B][COLOR=red]FOOD FOR THOUGHT on the "Importance of Children":[/COLOR][/B] [SIZE=2][SIZE=3][COLOR=#000080]Your children are not your children.[/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.[/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]They come through you but not from you, [/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]and though they are with you, and yet they belong not to you.[/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]You may give them your love, but not your thoughts. [/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]For they have their own thoughts.[/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]You may house their bodies but not their souls, [/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]for their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.[/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. [/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]For life goes not backward, nor tarries with yesterday. [/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]- Kahlil Gibran[/COLOR][/SIZE][/SIZE] [B][COLOR=#000080]______________________________________________________________________[/COLOR][/B] [SIZE=2][B][SIZE=3][COLOR=#000080]What Our Children Need [/COLOR][/SIZE][/B] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]They need us to CHERISH every minute with them, [/COLOR][/FONT][/FONT][/SIZE] [FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]For tomorrow may be too late. [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]They need us to HUG them, [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]So they know they are important to us. [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]They need us to show INTEREST in what they do, [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]All they want is approval. [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]They need us to LISTEN to what they say, [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]Remembering they are our future. [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]They need us to DREAM with them, [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]Because this how they find where they want to be in life. [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]They need us to RESPECT them, [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]Because this is how they learn to care about others. [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]They need us to ENCOURAGE them. [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]Because this is how they become the best that they can. [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]They need us to NURTURE them, [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]Because the world can be a harsh place. [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=2][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000080]AND WE ARE THEIR SHELTER FROM HARM! [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [/FONT][/SIZE] [FONT=Arial] [SIZE=2][FONT=Arial][COLOR=#6600ff][SIZE=2][FONT=Arial][COLOR=#6600ff][I][B][COLOR=#000080]- Robin Lea Black[/COLOR][/B][/I] [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE][/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#6600ff]______________________________________________________________________________________[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][/FONT] [FONT=MS Serif][COLOR=navy][B] [U][SIZE=5]Every Child Needs[/SIZE][/U] [/B][/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=MS Serif][/FONT] [B][FONT=MS Serif][COLOR=navy][U]1) Unconditional Love:[/U] physical and emotional warmth and closeness, through both good times and bad. In conjunction with an enduring sense of trust from both sides, unconditional love forms the foundation for a lifelong, mutually respectful, nurturing relationship between parent and child.[/COLOR][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=MS Serif][/FONT][/B] [FONT=MS Serif][COLOR=navy][U][B]2)[/B] [/U][B][U]Validation:[/U] affirmation for a child's thoughts, feelings, ideas, efforts, and especially for his or her individuality as a human being. Validation begins with a parent's highly attuned attention. Through generous praise, recognition, appreciation, hugs, pats on the back, and so forth, a child comes to feel as though his or her feelings truly matter within the family unit. Feeling solidly supported by our families during childhood is the primary mechanism for the formation of healthy self-esteem in human beings. [/B][/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=MS Serif][/FONT][/B] [FONT=MS Serif][COLOR=navy][U][B]3)[/B] [/U][B][U]Structure:[/U]an environment of "healthy limits" in which a child can grow and thrive. Good structure for children is a matter of balance. In order for them to feel emotionally secure and yet still have the freedom to grow, children need to experience age-appropriate, continually expanding boundaries as they mature. Nonoppressive, sometimes negotiable (where appropriate) limits are enforced with compassionate discipline, the ultimate goal being to teach children the arts of self-discipline and self-motivation.[/B][/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=MS Serif][/FONT] [FONT=MS Serif][COLOR=navy][U][B]4)[/B] [B]Understanding:[/B][/U][B] a child gains emotional security from knowing that he or she can make mistakes (even the mistake of behaving badly) without being shamed or degraded with excessive parental anger or harsh punishment. In this type of nurturing family system, parents understand that mistakes are an integral part of the learning process, and that children learn life's lessons more fully when they are guided with an "empathetic hand."[/B][/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=MS Serif][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=MS Serif][COLOR=navy][U]5) Healthy Modeling:[/U] consistent parental examples of emotional wholeness. We parents must show our children the way toward balance in life by modeling such things as emotional generosity toward others, calm and effective problem-solving skills (particularly in our dealings with them), healthy coping strategies in regard to our own daily stresses, and the ability to set goals and sustain our efforts in achieving them. For better or worse, our parental behavior is the most powerful life teacher for our children.[/COLOR][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=MS Serif][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=MS Serif][COLOR=navy][U]6) [/U][U]Challenge:[/U] age-appropriate incentives for a child to learn life's emotional and practical lessons at each developmental stage. In order to bolster our children's ability to problem-solve and achieve their goals, their minds need to be stimulated by learning new skills and overcoming obstacles. As we parents offer our children a wide variety of subject matter to explore, our use of encouragement and praise is key in sustaining their desire to master their world.[/COLOR][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=MS Serif][/FONT] [/B][B][FONT=MS Serif][COLOR=navy][U]7) Inclusion:[/U] a sense of belonging to the family group, and to the community at large. A healthy attachment to the primary caregiver in childhood is the first way that children learn to feel like welcome and valuable members of the family group. This core sense of belonging is what enables children to move confidently into the world, and reach out to others in a spirit of good will and camaraderie. It is important for them to experience the satisfaction of having other people depend on them, as well, which is taught in the home by having each child be responsible for important family duties. In this way, our children will learn to be responsible to themselves, to their families, and to society. [/COLOR][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=MS Serif][/FONT][/B] [FONT=MS Serif][COLOR=navy][B]When a child's developmental needs are met, he or she will naturally begin to experience:[/B][/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=MS Serif][/FONT][/B] [FONT=MS Serif][COLOR=navy][U][B]Healthy Self-Esteem[/B]:[/U][B] core feelings of self-acceptance, self-confidence, and self-respect as an individual. A child develops healthy self-esteem when his or her feelings, ideas, and achievements are accepted, valued, and supported within the family unit over the long term. Unlike arrogance - which is often a coping mechanism for covering up underlying feelings of worthlessness - healthy self-esteem is the keystone to understanding, respecting, and valuing others.[/B][/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=MS Serif][/FONT][/B] [FONT=MS Serif][COLOR=navy][U][B]Self-Actualization[/B]:[/U][B] a child's growing recognition of his or her unique thoughts and abilities throughout the maturation process. The prime goal of parenting is to prepare our children for independence in adulthood. We parents must therefore consistently encourage our children's journey toward autonomy, so they can learn to thrive "without us," emotionally, materially, and spiritually.[/B][/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=MS Serif][/FONT][/B] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][B][COLOR=navy]source:[/COLOR][/B] [URL="http://www.living-library.com/HeartMates/needs.htm"][U][COLOR=#810081]http://www.living-library.com/HeartMates/needs.htm[/COLOR][/U][/URL][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][/FONT][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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Importance Of Children
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