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Hard Talk
Dealing With Lust In This Society?
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<blockquote data-quote="Harry Haller" data-source="post: 196919" data-attributes="member: 14641"><p>I struggled with lust for many years, however, its not that hard when you see it for what it is,. there are different levels of struggle, some struggle not to think, some struggle not to act on thoughts, some give up all together and immerse themselves in a life of lust, its a bit like eating, some people can enjoy a nice meal now and then and see food primarily as fuel, some see it as pleasure and pleasure only. The fact of the matter is that it is not that difficult, it all depends on your attitude to life, do you want to be a dog on a lead, or a free person? A monkey in a zoo might say that lust is a massive problem, and it probably is, for a monkey, if indeed a monkey could be aware that it is a problem, we are human beings, we know its a problem because it is essentially animal behaviour we feel we have no control over, but we do, and we can.</p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>Anything can and will happen, John Lennon once said "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans", your getting wound up about things that could go many many ways, also, by the time you get married, or want to get married, it is likely that you will not even be the same person you are now, you will be more mature, more wise, and see things very differently. In my view it is pointless trying to deal with a problem in the future when you will not even be the same person you are now, let your future self deal with that one, what you must do now is study, educate yourself, get a foundation, a grounding, plan your life academically, or in whatever direction you wish to go in, this time will not come again, you have your entire future ahead of you, you can be anything or anyone you wish to be.</p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>it all depends whether you wish to date a man or a dog. Real men will respect you and enjoy your company, will enjoy cinemas, theatre, meals out, walking hand in hand in the moonlight, sitting in a car sharing hot chocolate and looking at the stars, talking about life, about philosophy, about meaning, a dog will do what a dog will do, find someone who has broken their programming, its hard, but such men do exist, my father is one. I on the other hand am not, it took me 45 years to break mine, my wife is a very patient woman <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>This, in my view is a misunderstanding of the word kaam, it does not mean solely animal lust, nor does it mean that if you do not commit animal lust, you are some sort of hero, it means lust period, for cars, for money, for power, for anything, however, it has been confused with celibacy or only having sex for childbearing, there is nothing wrong with lust in a relationship, however, it needs to be balanced, not the entire foundation, we all have lustful thoughts, but it is possible to see it for what it is, basic animal behaviour, and then laugh at it, and refuse to be bound by it, go into any nightclub and watch the mating rituals, from an outsiders point of view, it can be quite hilarious, I do not wish to be bound by such, nothing owns me, I indulge for sure, but it does not own me, you have to be free, and there is a time and a place for everything. The actual lust you speak of above is nothing more than a bone to a dog, you just have to drop the bone. </p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>It is possible, and as you get older, you will probably make it so, provided you can stand the brainwashing, rituals and traditions that exist in our culture. </p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>find a man and not a dog and anything is possible, you have high standards, do not compromise them for anyone, not your parents and not your friends, stick to your guns, if that is your ideal in the future, then focus on the present, and live by that ideal, it is a good one to navigate by, but if you do compromise, if you do end up in a field digging up bones, well, you do, don't be too hard on yourself, that's life. Maybe one day you will put the bones down and find that innocence you pined for when you were young. </p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>you don't need validation or help from anyone, it is your choice and you will reap what you sow, the only advice is to be true to yourself, be YOU.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Harry Haller, post: 196919, member: 14641"] I struggled with lust for many years, however, its not that hard when you see it for what it is,. there are different levels of struggle, some struggle not to think, some struggle not to act on thoughts, some give up all together and immerse themselves in a life of lust, its a bit like eating, some people can enjoy a nice meal now and then and see food primarily as fuel, some see it as pleasure and pleasure only. The fact of the matter is that it is not that difficult, it all depends on your attitude to life, do you want to be a dog on a lead, or a free person? A monkey in a zoo might say that lust is a massive problem, and it probably is, for a monkey, if indeed a monkey could be aware that it is a problem, we are human beings, we know its a problem because it is essentially animal behaviour we feel we have no control over, but we do, and we can. Anything can and will happen, John Lennon once said "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans", your getting wound up about things that could go many many ways, also, by the time you get married, or want to get married, it is likely that you will not even be the same person you are now, you will be more mature, more wise, and see things very differently. In my view it is pointless trying to deal with a problem in the future when you will not even be the same person you are now, let your future self deal with that one, what you must do now is study, educate yourself, get a foundation, a grounding, plan your life academically, or in whatever direction you wish to go in, this time will not come again, you have your entire future ahead of you, you can be anything or anyone you wish to be. it all depends whether you wish to date a man or a dog. Real men will respect you and enjoy your company, will enjoy cinemas, theatre, meals out, walking hand in hand in the moonlight, sitting in a car sharing hot chocolate and looking at the stars, talking about life, about philosophy, about meaning, a dog will do what a dog will do, find someone who has broken their programming, its hard, but such men do exist, my father is one. I on the other hand am not, it took me 45 years to break mine, my wife is a very patient woman :) This, in my view is a misunderstanding of the word kaam, it does not mean solely animal lust, nor does it mean that if you do not commit animal lust, you are some sort of hero, it means lust period, for cars, for money, for power, for anything, however, it has been confused with celibacy or only having sex for childbearing, there is nothing wrong with lust in a relationship, however, it needs to be balanced, not the entire foundation, we all have lustful thoughts, but it is possible to see it for what it is, basic animal behaviour, and then laugh at it, and refuse to be bound by it, go into any nightclub and watch the mating rituals, from an outsiders point of view, it can be quite hilarious, I do not wish to be bound by such, nothing owns me, I indulge for sure, but it does not own me, you have to be free, and there is a time and a place for everything. The actual lust you speak of above is nothing more than a bone to a dog, you just have to drop the bone. It is possible, and as you get older, you will probably make it so, provided you can stand the brainwashing, rituals and traditions that exist in our culture. find a man and not a dog and anything is possible, you have high standards, do not compromise them for anyone, not your parents and not your friends, stick to your guns, if that is your ideal in the future, then focus on the present, and live by that ideal, it is a good one to navigate by, but if you do compromise, if you do end up in a field digging up bones, well, you do, don't be too hard on yourself, that's life. Maybe one day you will put the bones down and find that innocence you pined for when you were young. you don't need validation or help from anyone, it is your choice and you will reap what you sow, the only advice is to be true to yourself, be YOU. [/QUOTE]
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Dealing With Lust In This Society?
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