Regarding Sikh Girls

[kds1980]

Dear amar

I know your reply will come in hurry The blog is quite old and started in dec 2005 there are plenty of comments on that blog by sikh men and women And many funny discussions like people betting that sikh swaroop will end in 50 years,others saying that sikh girls are worse than Aurangzeb etc.so jus start reading it from Dec 2005

please understand that keeping hair is not = sikhi

maybe sikhism, but not sikhi

before calling the logic poor, please give me a HARDCORE proof that men should wear turban

I called your logic poor where you said that just like it dissappeared in women it will dissappear for men.As far as proof is concerned I cannot give it neither i beleive that keeping hair =
sikhi but still if a person consider himself/herself sikh then he / should not
stop his/her partner practising sikh religion..You Very well Know that wearing turaban at present is core part of sikhism all sikh sects,sanatani's taksali's missionaries etc beleive that sikhs should wear turban and keeping uncut hair is very important part of sikhism.
so if a girl is proud to be a sikh and consider herself part of sikhism then she has to accept this image even if it involves sacrificing some of her personal choice.Tell me is it it too much too expect from such type of girls to accept turbaned sikh men.wHere are logics now that quality is more important than physical beauty.

 

[Archived_Member_19]

<<so if a girl is proud to be a sikh and consider herself part of sikhism then she has to accept this image even if it involves sacrificing some of her personal choice.Tell me is it it too much too expect from such type of girls to accept turbaned sikh men.wHere are logics now that quality is more important than physical beauty.>>>

quality?

can you please explain what do you mean by "quality"

can you judge quality of a candy merely looking at its wrapper?

people feel comfortable with like minded people.

why wouldn't guys accept that maybe the girls who cut hair but believe in sikh principles want a partner who resonates their beliefs i.e outer persona is not a replica or image of inner self and that inner beliefs matter more than outer appearances.

ah

i had no time to read the whole blog

i read the post you mentioned and saw 9 comments. hence my response.


and i hope you did check out the youtube video i posted

and i do read quite fast

 

[kds1980]

quality?

can you please explain what do you mean by "quality"

can you judge quality of a candy merely looking at its wrapper?

people feel comfortable with like minded people.

Quality means inner qualities.Where am I saying that a sikh girl should accept immdiately sikh man without looking at his inner quaklities.The point is wearing turban is very minor issue and if a girl find all the qualities of potential partner in turbaned sikh man and still still she rejects him then that girl is a fool.

And how could you say that that girl that cut her hair is not like minded with turbaned sikh man.Infact on sikhsangat I heard from some girls that plenty of sikh men without hesistation are engaging to sikh girls who trims.

why wouldn't guys accept that maybe the girls who cut hair but believe in sikh principles want a partner who resonates their beliefs i.e outer persona is not a replica or image of inner self and that inner beliefs matter more than outer appearances.

Again how could you say that men who wear turban beleive that outer appearance is more important.some beleive that outer and inner beleif both are imporatnt while other could that inner mainly.I don't see any conflict.

ah

i had no time to read the whole blog

Read it in 2 days or a week beleive me its a quite interesting blog with plenty of interesting comments.We can complete our discussion any time I am not going anywhere

 

[Archived_Member_19]

lol

there is not point to discuss


in fact you sem to be convinced that huge majority of girls discriminate

and i donot believe that all do- its a minority

i still find it tough to believe that just the turban is only reason.

its a lot of other things which the belief in outer bring along in a person that matter.

<<And how could you say that that girl that cut her hair is not like minded with turbaned sikh man.Infact on sikhsangat I heard from some girls that plenty of sikh men without hesistation are engaging to sikh girls who trims.>>

there is something called probability , dear..

and i wonder what those girls must be facing after marriage....

 

[kds1980]

lol

there is not point to discuss


in fact you sem to be convinced that huge majority of girls discriminate

and i donot believe that all do- its a minority

i still find it tough to believe that just the turban is only reason.

Not at all Large quantity of sikh girls are very good.This problem mainly exists in NRI's and upper middle to rich class of india.Poor,lower middle class,middle class girls hardly say anything against turbans or beard.For them and their parents finding a good earning sikh boy who keeps their daughter happy is dream come true.I even disscussed this issue in family and asked him what's the situation in my extended relative's in punjab.they said that situation is very good not even a single girl married clean shaven or married outside.

The main problem is dating.There is hardly any chance that a good sikh girl will date and search mariage partner on its own.Practising sikh girls just accept arrange and those who date are westernised so Finding a a practising sikh girl on its own is very difficuilt
in dating culture because high percentage of chance is they will prefer bollywood types not sardars.

there is something called probability , dear..

and i wonder what those girls must be facing after marriage....

Its just your perceptaion there are plenty of cases where one partner practice a religion more strictly than other.I think you will find plenty of cases of sardars with trimmed hair girls.

 

[Archived_Member1]

I think you will find plenty of cases of sardars with trimmed hair girls.

so why are you so angry that so-called sikh girls want guys to cut their hair too?

this is the double standard i speak of.

And many funny discussions like people betting that sikh swaroop will end in 50 years,others saying that sikh girls are worse than Aurangzeb etc.

you find this FUNNY??? i find it incredibly insulting, and it pretty much makes the entire blog irrelevant in my eyes.

 

[kds1980]

so why are you so angry that so-called sikh girls want guys to cut their hair too?

this is the double standard i speak of.

What double standards the sardars which are with cut here girls are not asking girls to cut their hair.if a keshdhari girl is with clean shaven sikh then there is nothing wrong in it as long as the girl choosen him for his qualities

you find this FUNNY??? i find it incredibly insulting, and it pretty much makes the entire blog irrelevant in my eyes.

Those comments just display the pain in heart of some sikhmen.sometimes through funny language people write their pain

 

[Archived_Member1]

i'm sorry, but any man who compares an entire group of women with a tyrannical mughal ruler is not being "funny" to hide his pain. he's being cynical and angry and will likely never find a woman who meets his impossible requirements who would want to live with an attitude like that.

maybe THAT's the problem with these guys. they HATE women so much they'll blame everything on us.

it's pathetic.

 

[kds1980]

i'm sorry, but any man who compares an entire group of women with a tyrannical mughal ruler is not being "funny" to hide his pain. he's being cynical and angry and will likely never find a woman who meets his impossible requirements who would want to live with an attitude like that.

maybe THAT's the problem with these guys. they HATE women so much they'll blame everything on us.

it's pathetic.

sometime's personal experiances do make people like this.There are plenty of feminists who talk and write trash against men what about that.some of them were not sat all treated by men well so they think that all men are bad.

 

[Archived_Member1]

sometime's personal experiances do make people like this.There are plenty of feminists who talk and write trash against men what about that.some of them were not sat all treated by men well so they think that all men are bad.

i see. so because some feminists trash talk men, that makes it ok for SIKH men to hate SIKH women?

sorry, i don't buy into that logic. if these guys are actually sikh, they won't have such an attitude.

 

[kds1980]

i see. so because some feminists trash talk men, that makes it ok for SIKH men to hate SIKH women?

sorry, i don't buy into that logic. if these guys are actually sikh, they won't have such an attitude.

That was the opinion of 1 sikh man not the entire and i never supported that comment

 

[Archived_Member_19]

<<The main problem is dating.There is hardly any chance that a good sikh girl will date and search mariage partner on its own.Practising sikh girls just accept arrange and those who date are westernised so Finding a a practising sikh girl on its own is very difficuilt
in dating culture because high percentage of chance is they will prefer bollywood types not sardars.>>


why do you think dating is good for "good" sikh guys and not for "good" sikh girls?

please change your mental paradigms or keep wallowing in the feeling that girls ignore guys with turbans

these statements are exactly the reason that girls get ticked off by guys who profess the holier than thou attitude.

if ur in the game, play by the rules....its simple as that

<<there are plenty of cases where one partner practice a religion more strictly than other.I think you will find plenty of cases of sardars with trimmed hair girls.>>

gimme a break.

you just proved yourself that all the riling you have been doing against girls with cut hair is wrong ...

so much for 8 pages of debate....!!!!!!!

 

[kds1980]

why do you think dating is good for "good" sikh guys and not for "good" sikh girls?

please change your mental paradigms or keep wallowing in the feeling that girls ignore guys with turbans

these statements are exactly the reason that girls get ticked off by guys who profess the holier than thou attitude.

if ur in the game, play by the rules....its simple as that

Amar i always thought that you as person with lot of knowledge but now I think I have to change my mind Nowhere I said that whether dating is good or bad for anyone.Just telling you
what's happening in society.Good sikh girls don't date its a fact neither their parents allow them.

gimme a break.

you just proved yourself that all the riling you have been doing against girls with cut hair is wrong ...

so much for 8 pages of debate....!!!!!!!

Just re read the entire debate not even a single word is said against the girls with cut hair
I don't know what you are reading.Just supported the original poster and said that any girl who discriminate solely on the basis sikh swaroop has no right to call herself sikh.whether she cuts her hair or not

 

[Archived_Member_19]

<<Good sikh girls don't date its a fact neither their parents allow them.>>
exactly this sentence shows that you are putting your opinions to rate someone GOOD or BAD
because if Good sikh girls donot date = bad sikh girls date..
huh
wonderful..
and then you go on to feel sorry that guys just can't get to date sikh girls..
doublespeak!!
i do understand your judging me to be of limited knowledge, as i can see from your judging girls' morality and character just based on if they date or not... amazing !!!
<<any girl who discriminate solely on the basis sikh swaroop has no right to call herself sikh.whether she cuts her hair or not>>
make up ur mind dear, your sentence above just proves one point
pagg = sikh
in another post you say its not just pagg = sikh
in one post you say, pagg guys can't get girls, in another post you say that you have seen a lot of pagg guys with girls who cut hair...

so you yourself prove that issue is maybe not pagg
but something else which comes along with pagg

 

[kds1980]

exactly this sentence shows that you are putting your opinions to rate someone GOOD or BAD
because if Good sikh girls donot date = bad sikh girls date..
huh
wonderful..
and then you go on to feel sorry that guys just can't get to date sikh girls..
doublespeak!!

From the point of view of religion a person is called good if he/she is practising.You cannot call a person good sikh if he/she drinks alchol or smoke.so good sikh gir means one who is somewhat practicing sikh religion.Also It is well known fact that majority of girls who date hide it from their parents if the family is not too liberalised.If they are such a good sikh girls then they should have the guts to tell their parents about their boyfriends.

make up ur mind dear, your sentence above just proves one point
pagg = sikh
in another post you say its not just pagg = sikh
in one post you say, pagg guys can't get girls, in another post you say that you have seen a lot of pagg guys with girls who cut hair...

so you yourself prove that issue is maybe not pagg
but something else which comes along with pagg

There is something in this world called chance , destiny.If you would have read the blogspot that i posted then may be you have better understanding of this problem.The fact is some people pointed out that ratio pagg wearing men are higher than sikh women ready to accept turban wearing men.So obviously plenty will find and some will remain.This problem of sikh men is standard issue on all sikh sites.Just search sikhnet and you will find that over and over again this problem is bought up by sikh man.

also its not just me who is saying this just read the views of some scholars in articles which i posted

http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/sikh-sikhi-sikhism/18603-postcard-from-punjab.html
Dr. Rajesh Gill, a sociologist at Panjab University, whose 18-year-old son sports a turban, speaks for many Sikh parents when she says, "A turban is a Sikh's pride, and I don't want my son to shear his hair once he becomes more independent".

Cutting one's hair is not new among Sikhs, but the number of turban-less, clean-shaven Sikhs has grown astronomically in the last two decades. "Thanks to the onslaught of satellite TV, there's a drive towards mainstreaming", says Gill, "Women aspire to marry men who look like Bollywood stars, and men aspire to look like the men these women want. 'The look', unfortunately, doesn't include a turban".

http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/essays-on-sikhism/18507-sacred-symbols-in-british-sikhism.html

In this sample, all thirty-three Sikh families clearly indicate their caste identity, i.e. Jat Sikh family, Ramgarhia Sikh family or Khatri Sikh family etc. Out of thirty-three Sikh families, seventeen seek clean-shaven spouses for their children, who are born and educated in Britain. Within this group of seventeen Sikh families, thirteen want clean-shaven boys for their girls while four families are looking for suitable spouses for their clean-shaven sons. A significant change from the 1960's emerging from the study of these advertisements is that almost all the boys and girls have been born and educated in Britain and hold professional jobs. Analysis of the matrimonial advertisements demonstrates the significance of caste for the Sikhs when it comes to the question of choosing spouses for their children. Another important factor emerging from this analysis is the growing preference among Sikh girls for clean-shaven boys. Moreover, only one out of thirty-three Sikh families states that their son wears a turban; it suggests that the common presumption about a male Sikh having un-shorn hair is losing its universal appeal within the Sikh diaspora.

 

[satwant]

The fact is that we must admit that the reality is before us. Sad but true. But do we need to argue amongst ourselves that who is right and who is wrong in his belief. What we should do is think collectively as to how we can encourage the younger brother and sister of ours to love the religion and why keep the hair is the in thing. Look at the bollywood actress. They have long hair and yet the Sikh girls in reality want to have short hair. The actors who portray the Sikhs in the movies do make an attempt to wear turban and yet the Sikh boys in Punjab all cut their hair.

All the music videos that emerge from punjab have Sikh boys who have short hair. I believe that the Sikhs in punjab dont believe that it is cool for a Pagri boy to be dating and dancing with a drop dead gorgeous punjabi girl who has long silky hair. Only a clean shaven boy can do it. Can we not change this perception?

This perception must be made right in Punjab. Ensure that the Sikh boys who are shown in the videos all have turban and long hair and the females have long hair with Chuni covering their head. The media is the most powerful weapon when it comes to changing mindsets and we all know it.

All Punjabi movies do not show the main actors with turban and long hair. Why? It baffles me.

Let stop arguing about who is right and wrong. It will take another century to figure out the answer and by that time, the religion may have faded away. Let's us start collectively right now to correct that perception and make constructive suggestions that will keep our faith on track.

Satwant

 

[kds1980]

Satwant ji a great reply I totally agree with you

 

[Archived_Member1]

All Punjabi movies do not show the main actors with turban and long hair. Why? It baffles me.

worse than that, the VILLAINS are shown with open beards and turbans! :}--}:

 

[dalsingh]

I don't know. I had a good friend with a turban and he had girls all over him (not encouraging that but please get my point).

I think that physical health, style and confidence play a large part in attracting girls.

Another plain fact we have to accept is that some people are better looking than others and this cannot be "hidden" under a turban and beard. If a bunda is a sohna sunukha gubroo with confidence and style I don't think a turban is any obstacle like is being suggested.

Also (a big point in my eyes), in the past Singhs were known to be brave robe wallay bundhay. Lets face facts: those Singhs in the 1700s took on powerful empires/armies and whooped their backsides. What could be more impressive in a bloke?

Compare that with many Singhs today who are largely conservatives. The Singhs of old were rebel exciting warriors with big ambitions. I imagine that would make them at least objects of curiosity for females.

If the evolutionary hypothesis is true and females innately seek security for themselves and potential offspring, then those types of guys would be appealing. How many guys today compare to them (I mean in and OUT of the Sikh community).

 

[kds1980]

does your friend have uncut beard