Welcome to SPN

Register and Join the most happening forum of Sikh community & intellectuals from around the world.

Sign Up Now!

Marrying a Girl Wearing a Turban

Discussion in 'Sikh Youth' started by etinder, Sep 18, 2005.

  1. etinder

    etinder
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Jul 26, 2004
    Messages:
    488
    Likes Received:
    6
    Just a thought that came across my mind after reading the post of sister truthseeker and amerikaurji..

    http://www.sikhism.us/sikh-youth/5559-earrings-rings-make-up.html

    That how many guys among us here would marry a girl who wears a turban, no makeup, earrings etc...?

    and similarly how many girls among us here on the forum would marry a guy with a turban and flowing uncut beard..?

    gurufateh
     
    #1 etinder, Sep 18, 2005
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 12, 2009
  2. Loading...

    Similar Threads Forum Date
    Man Killed for Marrying Upper Caste Girl Hard Talk Aug 31, 2010
    Islam Sikh Girls Marrying Muslims Interfaith Dialogues Mar 27, 2009
    sikh marrying non-sikh Blogs Oct 22, 2015
    Who Is Marrying Sikh Men? Sikh Rehat Maryada Jan 6, 2011
    Man Deceives Woman Into Marrying Him. Inducts Her Into Flesh Trade. Hard Talk Dec 17, 2010

  3. moorakh

    moorakh
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Sep 18, 2005
    Messages:
    2
    Likes Received:
    0
    Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa,
    Vaheguru Ji Ki Fateh!

    Just happened to discover this website today while I was randomly browsing.

    As regards bhain Amerikaur, and truthseeker's posts, there are many gursikhs (including me) who INSIST on marrying a singhni who is simple, honest, wears a dastaar, does not wear any make-up, and does not shave her hairs. (Don't we mean all of these things when we talk of a 'GURsikh'??)

    (BTW I missed the point about the doctor part in amerikaur's post; I am a physician, and proud to be a practising sikh in the US)

    Bhool Chook Maaf.....
     
  4. drkhalsa

    drkhalsa
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Sep 16, 2004
    Messages:
    1,308
    Likes Received:
    54
    DeAr Singh ji and Kaur ji


    I am also among the one who would like to marry a gursikh girl with turban if I ever got married in my life

    And I also feel the same as my friend above about the comment of Amerikaur ji but i think she has just highlighted the point for deciding the lifepartner based on materialistic criteria and doctor happen to be just coincidence in that post



    Jatinder Singh
     
  5. Amerikaur

    Amerikaur
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Feb 20, 2005
    Messages:
    146
    Likes Received:
    9
    Waheguru ji ka Khalsa, Waheguru ji ki Fateh.

    Veer ji Dr. Khalsa ji is right...then (and now)....I was looking for an educated man to marry.

    I found one. And my family absolultely ADORED him. Spiritual values seemed totally unimportant, heck, I didn't go to church that much anyway. What was much more important was that we were young and handsome and fabulous and had a life of wealth ahead of us.

    But life moves on. My ex-husband moved in with whom he cheated on me, the two of the got married and are going about their life. I moved to a rented apartment with my cat and discovered Sikhi, determined to serve God better than I had.

    BUt, the course has been difficult. Sikhi is not an easy path, Guru Sahib never said it was. But now that I want find a Singh of my own, I would love to find one with a turban, flowing uncut beard, and pyar in his heart for Sikhi.

    But I guess for me the question is...of the Gursikh men that would like a Kaur that keeps her swaroop, that also happens to be 30-something, divorced, and not a "desi" ?
     
  6. truthseeker

    truthseeker
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2004
    Messages:
    158
    Likes Received:
    8
    Waheguru ji ka khalsa, waheguru ji ki fateh!!

    To me personally.. a person who can wear a dastaar, doesn't matter if they are male or female, is the most beautiful person that there is on this earth. I dont think people realize the riducule that many people who do wear Dastaars get, yet they keep there faith in Guru ji... and they wear it out of love for HIM and for HIM alone.
    If i were to marry once i am older, i would marry a Sikh with a dastaar and flowing beard there is no question there.

    Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh!!
     
  7. Arvind

    Arvind
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer Contributor Supporter

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2004
    Messages:
    2,365
    Likes Received:
    379
    Wonderful... Waheguru mehar karan ji
     
  8. etinder

    etinder
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Jul 26, 2004
    Messages:
    488
    Likes Received:
    6
    Amerikaurji,
    i guess there would be lots of gursikhs who dont care if the person is desi or not, or which side of 30 is she or whether she is a divorcee or was never married, as far as she keeps her swaroop and is a guru ki sikhni and is compatible..rest are just details

    guru fateh
     
  9. angad mahal

    angad mahal
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Sep 21, 2005
    Messages:
    3
    Likes Received:
    0
    SatShriAKal to evrybody here THis is a very good topic that we all have picked up. Honestly the reality is that not much of the Sardarni girls prefer guys with ful hair and beard. Even my girl when first saw me said i wasent the guy she was lookin for So this is somethign thats really strange It hurts when the Identity that ur GURUS have given u is now workin against u in many frontiers I ould like to ask evry gurdwara to make this point out n clear
    WAHEGURU BLESS ALL OF US
     
  10. angad mahal

    angad mahal
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Sep 21, 2005
    Messages:
    3
    Likes Received:
    0
    HI there it was really touching story there i m glad that u stood up to the challenges of GOD. I was a Athest too but now there is a time that i cant stop remembering GOD. Anyways i wanted to send u a appriciation message sayin that Just ask Waheguru to give u a guy who loves u n is scared of GOD's Wrath. GOD BLESS U I hope u dint mind me messagin u this way.
     
  11. BhagatSingh

    BhagatSingh Canada
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer sikhiart.com

    Joined:
    Apr 25, 2006
    Messages:
    2,912
    Likes Received:
    1,640
    not to sound gay or anything but males with beards look more superior and more mature than males without beards
    and to me honestly a girl with a turban is just not sexually appealing i donno maybe its just the way of thinking other ppl have also developed

    i am 16 yrs old by the way and i dont shave etc
     
  12. truthseeker

    truthseeker
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2004
    Messages:
    158
    Likes Received:
    8
    Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh

    Bhagat Singh Ji, i too am sixteen.. soo i guess i understand where you are coming from somewhat because of the society that we have grown up in. But when we are looking for our supposed "partner" we should not be choosing them because they are sexually appealing to us. In fact that goes against our Guru Ji, sexual attraction is simply Kaam... and we work towards over coming this by Guru Ji's Kirpa.
    Bhul Chuk Maaf Karni

    Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh
     
  13. Lionchild

    Lionchild
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer Supporter

    Joined:
    May 16, 2005
    Messages:
    341
    Likes Received:
    9
    same here...sadly, who would ever marry a "new" sikh? Well... it just take what waheguru gives me, he know's what's best!
     
  14. vijaydeep Singh

    vijaydeep Singh
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Jul 30, 2004
    Messages:
    1,744
    Likes Received:
    86
    Gurfateh

    For das without Turban one or even withour uncut hair will work but after marriege das can tell her to keep hair or turban(to be more clerer das can tell her before marriege that after marige she must keep 5Ks).
    coming to sexulity some one can feel aruse by seeing Burqa cald women.

    It is more to do with respect towards the lady with Turban that we do not feel lust and later even this can help that lady to evade provocatiojn to prevert often due to revealing dress.But is more upto her.As a male das can respect the views of lady instead of forcing own views onto her.
     
  15. sunvai

    sunvai
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Apr 24, 2006
    Messages:
    13
    Likes Received:
    2
    Alrite ok im a sardani gurl ...and i
    I do not prefer of a guy with long hair & flowing beard. I personally do not know y but it doesn’t attract me. Also, I really don’t mind if the hair is uncut but the flowing beard has got to go….Maybe I’m wrong but, it simply does not attract me. I know that guru gobind singh ji and all the other gurus have kept their hair and a beard, yet, generation is changing and people are changing, people all over the world are entering new faces and finding like for other people.
     
  16. truthseeker

    truthseeker
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2004
    Messages:
    158
    Likes Received:
    8
    Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh

    Sunvai Bhenji,
    If you dont mind me asking, do you keep your hair?

    Because from what im gathering its only those who keep their hair that would want a partner who does too. If one doesnt keep Kesh, then why would their partner?
    Ya its Guru ji's rehat but in the world we live in today, not many people are follwoing or listening to that.

    Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh
     
  17. sunvai

    sunvai
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Apr 24, 2006
    Messages:
    13
    Likes Received:
    2
    Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh

    Truthseeker,
    To actually be being broad I do keep my hair. As I said earlier that I'm quite frankly ok with having a guy with Kesh. However, I just don't want the flowing beard. Maybe because my family keeps Kesh and only cuts beard, maybe it's the influence from my family and their thoughts on life partners.
     
  18. truthseeker

    truthseeker
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2004
    Messages:
    158
    Likes Received:
    8
    Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh

    Sunvai ji,
    i didnt mean to come off harsh or anything, it was just an honest question. When i asked about keeping hair, i meant all hair on the body not just soley on your head. Hair is Hair no matter where; arms, legs, head, or face its still hair in the end.Maybe an alternative to cutting or trimming the beard could just be to tie it... i know many of my uncles who tuie their beard so that it doesnt look like its soo long and its not flowing in everything.
    Once again im sorry to have seemed rude in my other post.

    Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh
     
  19. Prabjyot Kaur

    Prabjyot Kaur
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2004
    Messages:
    113
    Likes Received:
    25
    I understand where sunvai is coming from. It is very true that a girl's perception of her life-partener's looks is greatly influenced by the way her own father, uncles, brothers and cousin-brothers looked like.

    It is when Guru blesses someone, that person is put in the company of such Saadh-sangat that a new perception over-writes the one formed under the influence of the family.

    As a young girl, I would not have cared if a turbanned Keshadhari man would have trimmed his beard to make it look 'sharp' or just tied it as both ways were practiced in our family with 4 men. Guru was meharbaan and I was very fortunate to realize the 'difffernce' before choosing my life-partener. My life changed. I have always admired the flowing beard of my Singh while his mother always criticized him for doing so (as my father-in-law always tied his.) I hope it helps you understand the women a bit.
     
  20. sunvai

    sunvai
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer

    Joined:
    Apr 24, 2006
    Messages:
    13
    Likes Received:
    2
    Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ke fateh,

    Truth Seeker,
    No no, I am very very sorry for being straight on, making the impression that you were thinking I was giving a harsh reply. However, I do not disrespect you decision, its just that to me, I do not like guys with beards. Many of my cousins do it, however it’s a thing wear, if your family doesn’t like it, its just that most likely the whole family will copy one another and agree to the same decisions. That is jus how a family works. I understand that hair is everywhere, and that you cannot do really anything about it, unless you shave etc. Also, that you can tie you beard back, that’s wut most my cousins do.
    Your post wasn’t harsh at all actually, it was my wording, sorry and please don’t take to heart.
    P.S. You are very kind hearted! In a good way!
     
  21. Lionchild

    Lionchild
    Expand Collapse
    SPNer Supporter

    Joined:
    May 16, 2005
    Messages:
    341
    Likes Received:
    9
    How can you be keshdhari and cut hair, if not.. then why the cutting? the hair is most beautiful, a gift from god.
     

Share This Page