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Why Do We Shout In Anger?

Discussion in 'General' started by Archived_Member16, Mar 16, 2013.

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  1. Archived_Member16

    Archived_Member16
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    Why We Shout In Anger?

    A saint was visiting a river to take bath when he ran into a group of family members shouting in anger at each other. After they left the area he turned to his disciples and asked, “Why do people in anger shout at each other?”

    His disciples thought for a while then one of them said, “Because we lose our calm, we shout.”

    “But, why should you shout when the other person is just next to you? You can as well tell him what you have to say in a soft manner?” asked the saint.

    Disciples gave some other answers but none satisfied the other disciples.

    Finally the saint explained, “When two people are angry at each other, the distance between their heart grows This happens because they are now expressing themselves through their ego. The ego has been hurt and they want to retaliate back and return the hurt. With all these hurt feelings, the hearts have moved apart and to cover the increased distance they must now shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other to cover the increasingly growing distance between their hearts.”

    “What happens when two people fall in love? They don’t shout at each other but talk softly or whisper. Their egos are out of the way and this allows their hearts to come very close and love to bloom. The distance between them is either nonexistent or very small. When they love each other even more, what happens? There is no need even to whisper, mere looks suffice.”

    The saint continued, “So when you argue be careful. Are you arguing from the ego? You will know it if you find yourself speaking loudly and have hurt feelings inside. If you allow that to happen often you will let your hearts grow distant. Soon a day will come when the distance is so great that you may not find the path to return.

    It helps to remember that the word anger is just one letter short of the word danger. It is not that anger is an inappropriate emotion. It is only when it is expressed through the ego in a loud and inappropriate way with an intention to hurt the other person, does it become dangerous and counterproductive.”

    source: http://mylifeyoga.com/2012/05/12/why-we-shout-in-anger/
     

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  3. chazSingh

    chazSingh United Kingdom
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    someone posted on their facebook wall today:
    "I don't have an attitude problem I am just simply treating people as they treat me!!"
    many of the persons facebook friends then 'liked' the comment.

    This got me thinking...
    many people think they are 'nice' people...that they only behave a certain way if they are provoked...

    but then what makes us any different to the person that provoked us...
    all they did was show us that we also have this 'dark' side within us...

    if we get angry because someone has provoked us...then maybe our next thought should be:

    "Thank you god for showing me that i also have an anger issue "
    and then do our simran and seva and flush this disease out of us regardless of whether we were provoked or not

    or maybe the next time someone shouts at us....say something 'kind' in return no matter how many insults one receives...

    Remember, all that exists is god...if someone is angry at you, it will be god using the other person to show you how much anger you have within yourselves.
     
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  4. Kanwaljit Singh

    Kanwaljit Singh India
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    I think the movie Life of Pi is about the same. That young boy brings forth the Tiger within.

    I always think of Guru Nanak and his approach towards angry people. Thankfully many Sakhis cover that.
     
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  5. Luckysingh

    Luckysingh Canada
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    Anger and shouting is very much associated with ego.
    You shout at someone when you feel you have power and the upperhand in your statement.
    When there is No ego, then there is no reason to shout in anger.
    A kid doesn't shout in anger at his teacher because there is no ego issue.
    But nowadays, you do get mouthing kids but this is all about the 'ego' within amongst the egos of fellow class mates not the teacher's ego.
    So a kind will mouth off at it's teacher/master to look 'tougher' amongst the other kids.
     
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  6. chazSingh

    chazSingh United Kingdom
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    gosh, the amount of shouting at i've experienced over the past year :)
    verbal abuse, mocking, swearing, pushing, things being thrown around, threats...you name it..from more than one person

    at the beginning, it really affected me...anger, hurt...although i never used to 'lose it' i could feel it brewing inside of me and it would affect me for days.

    then like a little light shining through me, i started trying to return nice comments back...when i received verbal abuse, i told them to say some more :)...if i was told i was a 'fool' i would reply back "yes, i agree...i am from time to time..it's something i gotta work on' :) ...these kind of comments cause a mental short circuit in the other persons mind.

    and then one day the strangest thing...through the carnage, i felt detached from it all...strange feeling of freedom...the whole thing just felt like a 'play' as i witnessed it all...feeling at complete peace within...even smiling throughout it all.

    felt great...i thank god for all the abuse, because the feeling of freedom from it all whilst being in the thick of it was worth a million pounds and more.

    God bless
     
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