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Funny Stories #5

Discussion in 'Blogs' started by Harry Haller, Oct 17, 2015.

  1. Harry Haller

    Harry Haller United Kingdom
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    Writer SPNer Contributor

    Jan 31, 2011
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    Going back about 7 years, the IT consultancy I ran with about 4 other people was a madhouse, mostly down to my own madness, but looking back, it was a time of innocence and childlike behaviour, I have fond memories of the time,

    One day, I bought a squirrel puppet, not quite sure why, but I was enchanted with it, and after a while, would not take it off, it went everywhere with me, and sometimes, if I was having a particularly boring meeting, I would bring him out of my pocket, up to my ear, and start laughing and having a conversation with it, while it whispered replies back to me in my ear. Sometimes I would walk down the road where our shop was, and spotting one of my engineers cars, which was due to be scrapped thanks to a dodgy engine, would pause, the squirrel would come out, point to the car, whisper in my ear, and then I would kick seven bells out of the door, before stopping, having the squirrel whisper to me again, both of us nodding, and then walk off.

    One day, the man from Microsoft walked in, he did not seem very friendly, he asked for 'whoever deals with your software', I replied that squirry did. Where is Squirry, he asked, I confess to not really liking his attitude, so I replied that Squirry was in my pocket. The man said he did not care where he was, but if he did not speak to someone soon, there would be trouble, so I took Squirry out of my pocket, and held him up. For a while the man looked at the puppet and then looked at me, 'where do you buy your software from' 'dont ask me', I said, 'Squirry does all that', he could not bring himself to look at the squirrel, but finally, I moved my hand so it was in his line of sight, 'go on', I said, 'ask him', the man started to get angry and threatened to report me to the 'software alliance' a sort of SPGC of the software world, but without the task force, at this point, I screwed my fingers together and lo behold, it looks like the squirrel is crying, 'look what you've done' I shouted, 'you've upset Squirry', 'apologise!', 'NO', 'apologise!!!!' 'NOOO'

    this went on for some time, but in the end, he did apologise, and went on to have a detailed conversation with Squirry, and even agreed to have his photograph taken with Squirry, which we put on the wall.

    We later found out that every shop in our area had been visited, but we were the only ones that did not get a complimentary pack in the following week, I blame Squirry...
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