Dilemma for Westerners: A Second Look

Taken elsewhere from internet...

 
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This thread is copied from an existing thread Dilemma for Westerners. There is no redirect. Narayanjot Kaur
Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/new-to-sikhism/26118-dilemma-for-westerners-a-second-look.html

Aman Singh Ji,

Gurfateh

These are my personal views:

With Sikhism becoming global, it will have to adopt different languages especially English to spread Guru's message. In India for a very long period Hindi and Urdu have been used for this purpose so what is the problem if English and other languages are used? And right now are we not using English?

Even within families residing outside Punjab, the language of communication is often Hindi or English.
Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=26118

Dress has never been a problem. Men generally wear European dress along with a turban and beard neatly rolled up and pressed. They look pretty smart and women wear jeans, skirts, slacks or whatever even in Gurudwaras.

The only problem appears to be Kesh and that too for men only because they need to be covered. Women do not cover their head in India other than in Gurudwaras or in presence of Granth Sahib as as a mark of respect. Turban and beard seem to be the only problem for men. Perhaps this problem also could be resolved with time.

Wahaguru ji ka Khalsa Wahaguru ji ka Fateh
Having born I a Sikh family I had to go through the hard time in the 1960’s but found that if you want something then it they for the taking.
As for the thought of have to keep your beard then that is not any problems as in the America they are many Sikhs how have transferred they religion for the better side.
Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=26118
To learn to wear the turban they are Sikh Gurdwaras all over the USA just go to them and explain that you wish to learn to tie a turban they will help you with all your needs.
As for your family they can and will see that Sikhism is not only a religion but a way of life.
As for read the Nitnam you can do that in English as you wish to praise the lord it dose not matter in what language it is prayed. It is how you feel about the prayers and not the way you say them

ja58ir ji,

What the anonymous person met was, that a white American wearing a wearing a turban would be queer sight in America and he would not be accepted among his peers in America both socially and at work place. And if does not wear it then he will not be accepted in local Gurdwara and by the Sikhs. That is the dilemma.
Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=26118

Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=26118
This appears to be the only problem. As I have said earlier that this problem also with Guru's Grace would be straightened out with time.

I guess this is a sort of brainstorming. So as a temporary measure can this suggestion be feasible?:

The the man in his social interactions and at workplace can keep open hair or in a pigtail or in bun just like Sikh women do and the beard can be suitably be set and pressed just as Ragis do. I do find many foreign tourist in India with this fashion statement! When in a Gurudwara or with Sikh friends he can put on the turban.

Will this be acceptable?

Harbhansj ji

I like the idea of brainstorming about this topic. It is doubtful that we ever brainstormed about this in the past.

But I do have 2 reactions. The dilemma of a turban is not such a dilemma once a person decides - OK, this is what I am going to do -- tie dastar. It is one of those dilemmas that evaporates when the individual decides to take a stand one way or the other. There are many white Sikhs who decided just that, and in spite of whatever problems come their way, persist with dastar, going about their business at home, at work, and in the community. The question of who thinks what about someone's choice to wear a turban tends to become insignificant for them. They just resolve the dilemma in terms of their personal conclusions about keeping hair, and to be consistent with the image of unshorn hair and turban that identifies a Sikh. I don't have statistics -- but there have to be more "white" Sikh males in turbans, than not in turbans, because along with a beard it is the primary way of signaling that you are a Sikh.

A thought on the side. Who started this "white" Sikh label? It has a life of its own any more. My guess on this is that just about every one who is a Sikh is on a continuum from very pale to very brown. Or am I in denial ?

My other reaction goes to your question "will this be acceptable?" No matter what the choice a person makes it won't be acceptable to someone. For example, if a man wears a turban it may please his sangat; but if his wife wears one there will be members of the sangat that think she is making an unacceptable statement.

So your original idea of using the thread to brainstorm about these dilemmas is the more fruitful way o generate interest and ideas-- as long as various readers don't miss the point -- it is about listing experiences and suggestions.

Narayanjot ji,

I like your enthusiastic support for for a Sabat Surat Sikh with a turban or Dastar. I was just thinking as a way out for the problem of the anonymous Sikh in Aman Singh jis mail.

Now I will quote the experience of a distant cousin of mine who had emigrated to America in 1989. He is a talented and hardworking professional. He is a strict Sarab Lohi who knows Nit Nem and Sukhmani Sahib by heart and recites these every morning. On reaching America he posted 100s of CVs over the next 3 months and got quite a few interview calls by the not a single offer. His brother who had sponsored him told him that his kesh and turban was coming in the way. His brother had shaved off his kesh. But this guy then chose to return to India and kept his kesh. It was a great struggle those days. He was without a job for a long time. Those days the economy was not good and they were days of peak insurgency and Sikhs were looked at suspiciously. But with persistence he got a job and is now well off.

Harbansj ji

Forgive me if I seemed like an extreme example of an optimist. There are some stumbling blocks in my experience and they don't quite show up in my response earlier to you.

Not everything has a rosy color -- that I will admit. And I did not want to seem as if I was ignorant of the prejudice faced by Sikhs in dastar -- because I am not. My point was only that the dilemma is a dilemma as long as a person allows it to baffle them. Then decisions have to be made if a person wants to end the bewilderment and suffering.

There are Sikhs who came West from East who have shaved and don't wear turbans. That was the way they solved the problem of "fitting in" and getting a job. There are Sikhs from the West who are still Western (but born in Punjabi/Sikh families) who have solved the problem too. Either they keep kesh and tie dastar or they don't. And there are Western Sikhs who converted, who for the most part keep kesh and wear turbans, as I said above, mostly the majority of this group keep kesh and wear turbans.

Each decision has its advantages and its disadvantages. There is no perfect solution. But the trials and tribulations of the "dilemma" go away once you decide --- This is it! I am going to do __________! You make a choice and understand the consequences. Keep your eye wide open. Make the adjustments that are needed. And then move on. Yes it may mean moving from West Virginia to New Mexico or California. Or it may mean working in one area of business rather than another. It may mean you go to a different gurdwara than the one you have attended for years. Or it may mean some other kind of adjustment is necessary.
Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=26118
Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=26118

But making a decision and then moving ahead in life takes much less energy than continual worry about whether other people accept you or do not accept you. And making changes is an option. That is all I can say for now. Once we put these problems behind us then we can move on to some much bigger dilemmas that face Sikhs in the West that cross national boundaries and also religious ones.

Thanks for a good discussion.

I know two Die hard taksali sikhs sarb lohis and all....who migrated to Canada/Germany..didnt get job offers as banna wearers...decided to shave off...still didnt get any jobs..waited around...trying to justify theur fall from grace....and FINALLY....came back to Malaysia..resumed their banna !!! A third such sarb lohi...stayed behind ONLY because he got a job as GRANTHI in a Canadian Gurdwara..( he is an accountant)..shaving OFF didnt help him get a job based on his Accountancy Degree either )
Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=26118
Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=26118
SO ALL this...is a MIRAGE....Kesh or no KESH..it all HIS HUKM. People may think..i got the job because i am bald..i am tall.. i am white.. i am black..whatever...but its all in your own mind...and in the mind of the one who hired YOU !! WHO put that idea to hire YOU in "his/her".. MIND ??????????????????

Sadh Sangat,

Guru Fateh,

Allow me to pitch in with my take on this topic. I see this topic taken from the Internet a fake and someone who is anti Sikhi, perhaps not even an ex catholic.

Let us dissect this article:

To make it easier, let us assume that the person is a male. No offence to females intended.

The writer starts with a great input and shows how impressed he is with Sikhism and the qualities it presents:

One wonders, why wouldn't he give reasons of his leaving Catholicism and what does he mean by early teens? At 14, 15, 16?What made the person leave the religion at this early age and how did his parents take it?

Now comes the sledge hammer of his true intentions. He refuses to talk about the dilemmas of his own faith that he has claimed to have left in this early teens but here he finds faults in Sikhi where there are none. Let's delve into his article a bit further.

So far so good. Nice way to sledge hammer Sikhi comes after this wonderful true side of Sikhi


The above statement is utterly false. Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji is universally centered. How can a universal message of love, compassion, fraternity, brother/sisterhood and Sarbhat da bhala can be ethnic and region- centric?


Sikhi is still a very young religion. The jealous forces in India which included the Mughals, Turks, Afghanis and Hindus tried to crush and eliminate Sikhi even before it was fully evolved as a way of life. The sacrifices of our Gurus and other Sikhs and the price paid by the head of our young lads and lassies are the proofs how the dogmatic religions of the time were scared, envious and jealous of the universal way of life which taught people to embrace all as the children of ONE GOD, none belonging to any lesser god.Sikhs were very busy defending the innocent women being abducted and raped by the fiends who called themselves religious. And due to the absence of any kind of hierarchy which was the great novel vision of our Gurus, it will take longer than other religions to have the right interpretations in other languages. We are progressing slowly.

The writer fails to understand, hence unable to appreciate that this is the beauty of Sikhi and its biggest asset. Centralised power in other religions have led to all kinds of abuses, which included crusades, invasions, murders, rapes and last but not the least molestations of young boys and girls.

The above statement is again finding faults where none exist.The writer ignores the facts that Orthodox Jews are the main diamond and gems dealers in New York and other parts of the world. The Amish have chosen their way of life and seem happy in their way but eventually they have to change their ways with the world.

The comparison of these two not only show the naivete of the writer but it also show the lack of any kind of understanding of Sikhi. Sikhs are very adaptable, that is why a Sikh can be found in any part of the world with the Baana.

The poor writer either has no idea that there are half a million Sikhs from Indian origin are raising their families here or he is pretending to be what he is not. As he has shown his knowledge of Sikhi, he should know that people from any race, creed, hue and faith are welcome in any Gurdwara and if they are willing to learn, they are helped in learning about Sikhi without any preconditions. Secondly, an "ex- catholic and then an atheist" will never use the word CLEAN SHAVEN.So, the last part of his above statement has exposed him from his burrow. It is nothing but provocation.

Here he goes again flaunting his ignorance laced with arrogance with his taunts about the Sikhi Baana. What discrimination is he talking about? Does anyone have any idea about it? Hasn't he seen Sikhs of non Indian origins with Baana or has he ignored them for some reason only known to him?

I have no idea where he got the above from.

.The writer has shown nothing but bias, bigotry and flaunted his ignorance in the article, hence should not be taken seriously. We get many people like him on SPN trying to undermine Sikhi and are dealt with in the right manner.

I would request Aman ji, to find the name of the author and let us invite him here so we can have a direct interaction with him.

Tejwant Singh