☀️ JOIN SPN MOBILE
Forums
New posts
Guru Granth Sahib
Composition, Arrangement & Layout
ਜਪੁ | Jup
ਸੋ ਦਰੁ | So Dar
ਸੋਹਿਲਾ | Sohilaa
ਰਾਗੁ ਸਿਰੀਰਾਗੁ | Raag Siree-Raag
Gurbani (14-53)
Ashtpadiyan (53-71)
Gurbani (71-74)
Pahre (74-78)
Chhant (78-81)
Vanjara (81-82)
Vaar Siri Raag (83-91)
Bhagat Bani (91-93)
ਰਾਗੁ ਮਾਝ | Raag Maajh
Gurbani (94-109)
Ashtpadi (109)
Ashtpadiyan (110-129)
Ashtpadi (129-130)
Ashtpadiyan (130-133)
Bara Maha (133-136)
Din Raen (136-137)
Vaar Maajh Ki (137-150)
ਰਾਗੁ ਗਉੜੀ | Raag Gauree
Gurbani (151-185)
Quartets/Couplets (185-220)
Ashtpadiyan (220-234)
Karhalei (234-235)
Ashtpadiyan (235-242)
Chhant (242-249)
Baavan Akhari (250-262)
Sukhmani (262-296)
Thittee (296-300)
Gauree kii Vaar (300-323)
Gurbani (323-330)
Ashtpadiyan (330-340)
Baavan Akhari (340-343)
Thintteen (343-344)
Vaar Kabir (344-345)
Bhagat Bani (345-346)
ਰਾਗੁ ਆਸਾ | Raag Aasaa
Gurbani (347-348)
Chaupaday (348-364)
Panchpadde (364-365)
Kaafee (365-409)
Aasaavaree (409-411)
Ashtpadiyan (411-432)
Patee (432-435)
Chhant (435-462)
Vaar Aasaa (462-475)
Bhagat Bani (475-488)
ਰਾਗੁ ਗੂਜਰੀ | Raag Goojaree
Gurbani (489-503)
Ashtpadiyan (503-508)
Vaar Gujari (508-517)
Vaar Gujari (517-526)
ਰਾਗੁ ਦੇਵਗੰਧਾਰੀ | Raag Dayv-Gandhaaree
Gurbani (527-536)
ਰਾਗੁ ਬਿਹਾਗੜਾ | Raag Bihaagraa
Gurbani (537-556)
Chhant (538-548)
Vaar Bihaagraa (548-556)
ਰਾਗੁ ਵਡਹੰਸ | Raag Wadhans
Gurbani (557-564)
Ashtpadiyan (564-565)
Chhant (565-575)
Ghoriaan (575-578)
Alaahaniiaa (578-582)
Vaar Wadhans (582-594)
ਰਾਗੁ ਸੋਰਠਿ | Raag Sorath
Gurbani (595-634)
Asatpadhiya (634-642)
Vaar Sorath (642-659)
ਰਾਗੁ ਧਨਾਸਰੀ | Raag Dhanasaree
Gurbani (660-685)
Astpadhiya (685-687)
Chhant (687-691)
Bhagat Bani (691-695)
ਰਾਗੁ ਜੈਤਸਰੀ | Raag Jaitsree
Gurbani (696-703)
Chhant (703-705)
Vaar Jaitsaree (705-710)
Bhagat Bani (710)
ਰਾਗੁ ਟੋਡੀ | Raag Todee
ਰਾਗੁ ਬੈਰਾੜੀ | Raag Bairaaree
ਰਾਗੁ ਤਿਲੰਗ | Raag Tilang
Gurbani (721-727)
Bhagat Bani (727)
ਰਾਗੁ ਸੂਹੀ | Raag Suhi
Gurbani (728-750)
Ashtpadiyan (750-761)
Kaafee (761-762)
Suchajee (762)
Gunvantee (763)
Chhant (763-785)
Vaar Soohee (785-792)
Bhagat Bani (792-794)
ਰਾਗੁ ਬਿਲਾਵਲੁ | Raag Bilaaval
Gurbani (795-831)
Ashtpadiyan (831-838)
Thitteen (838-840)
Vaar Sat (841-843)
Chhant (843-848)
Vaar Bilaaval (849-855)
Bhagat Bani (855-858)
ਰਾਗੁ ਗੋਂਡ | Raag Gond
Gurbani (859-869)
Ashtpadiyan (869)
Bhagat Bani (870-875)
ਰਾਗੁ ਰਾਮਕਲੀ | Raag Ramkalee
Ashtpadiyan (902-916)
Gurbani (876-902)
Anand (917-922)
Sadd (923-924)
Chhant (924-929)
Dakhnee (929-938)
Sidh Gosat (938-946)
Vaar Ramkalee (947-968)
ਰਾਗੁ ਨਟ ਨਾਰਾਇਨ | Raag Nat Narayan
Gurbani (975-980)
Ashtpadiyan (980-983)
ਰਾਗੁ ਮਾਲੀ ਗਉੜਾ | Raag Maalee Gauraa
Gurbani (984-988)
Bhagat Bani (988)
ਰਾਗੁ ਮਾਰੂ | Raag Maaroo
Gurbani (889-1008)
Ashtpadiyan (1008-1014)
Kaafee (1014-1016)
Ashtpadiyan (1016-1019)
Anjulian (1019-1020)
Solhe (1020-1033)
Dakhni (1033-1043)
ਰਾਗੁ ਤੁਖਾਰੀ | Raag Tukhaari
Bara Maha (1107-1110)
Chhant (1110-1117)
ਰਾਗੁ ਕੇਦਾਰਾ | Raag Kedara
Gurbani (1118-1123)
Bhagat Bani (1123-1124)
ਰਾਗੁ ਭੈਰਉ | Raag Bhairo
Gurbani (1125-1152)
Partaal (1153)
Ashtpadiyan (1153-1167)
ਰਾਗੁ ਬਸੰਤੁ | Raag Basant
Gurbani (1168-1187)
Ashtpadiyan (1187-1193)
Vaar Basant (1193-1196)
ਰਾਗੁ ਸਾਰਗ | Raag Saarag
Gurbani (1197-1200)
Partaal (1200-1231)
Ashtpadiyan (1232-1236)
Chhant (1236-1237)
Vaar Saarang (1237-1253)
ਰਾਗੁ ਮਲਾਰ | Raag Malaar
Gurbani (1254-1293)
Partaal (1265-1273)
Ashtpadiyan (1273-1278)
Chhant (1278)
Vaar Malaar (1278-91)
Bhagat Bani (1292-93)
ਰਾਗੁ ਕਾਨੜਾ | Raag Kaanraa
Gurbani (1294-96)
Partaal (1296-1318)
Ashtpadiyan (1308-1312)
Chhant (1312)
Vaar Kaanraa
Bhagat Bani (1318)
ਰਾਗੁ ਕਲਿਆਨ | Raag Kalyaan
Gurbani (1319-23)
Ashtpadiyan (1323-26)
ਰਾਗੁ ਪ੍ਰਭਾਤੀ | Raag Prabhaatee
Gurbani (1327-1341)
Ashtpadiyan (1342-51)
ਰਾਗੁ ਜੈਜਾਵੰਤੀ | Raag Jaijaiwanti
Gurbani (1352-53)
Salok | Gatha | Phunahe | Chaubole | Swayiye
Sehskritee Mahala 1
Sehskritee Mahala 5
Gaathaa Mahala 5
Phunhay Mahala 5
Chaubolae Mahala 5
Shaloks Bhagat Kabir
Shaloks Sheikh Farid
Swaiyyae Mahala 5
Swaiyyae in Praise of Gurus
Shaloks in Addition To Vaars
Shalok Ninth Mehl
Mundavanee Mehl 5
ਰਾਗ ਮਾਲਾ, Raag Maalaa
What's new
New posts
New media
New media comments
New resources
Latest activity
Videos
New media
New comments
Library
Latest reviews
Donate
Log in
Register
What's new
New posts
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Welcome to all New Sikh Philosophy Network Forums!
Explore Sikh Sikhi Sikhism...
Sign up
Log in
Social Lounge
Relationships
Hypocrisy In Choosing Partners?
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="namritanevaeh" data-source="post: 207210" data-attributes="member: 18793"><p>I'm coming back to this having re-read it and thinking it pertains to a friend I have currently. He's single and looking.</p><p></p><p>He thought the other day he wasn't picky. And then listed that he wanted someone who's vegetarian, doesn't cut her hair and doesn't have kids. And he's 40-ish.</p><p></p><p>And I'm eventually going to go back and chat again on this subject but I felt that is actually pretty picky.</p><p></p><p>I TOTALLY understand him wanting her vegetarian. In a religious sense. But he said it would gross him out to see her eating meat. And I'm like...my ex grossed me out by eating Parmesan cheese (nasty stuff!). But that's not why I divorced him. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /> feeling something is nasty is fine, but it's also possible to do something like eat meat only when he's not there. Just as an example. I GET that he wouldn't want that, so I'm not really debating it. I've never eaten meat in front of my man friend, and he knows I eat meat but I do it when he's not there, out of respect.</p><p></p><p>But the hair thing I dunno I can't get it! Like, if you want "me" (meaning whatever people there are on this earth) to respect that "you" don't want to cut your hair, for religious reasons, that's great, and I personally do and I love my man friend in all his hairy glory. But I want the same respect that I don't need to follow that even if I will defend "your" right to wear a turban and keep your hair long, and defend it FIERCELY. I kinda go "are we all one people or are we not?". If we separate people out into "has long hair" and "doesn't" to my mind it comes down to a caste thing. If you can accept that your coworker and maybe even your best friend isn't a fully practicing Sikh and maybe isn't Sikh at all, why can't you accept that your wife isn't? AS LONG AS SHE RESPECTS YOUR PERSONAL NEED TO BE SIKH? Like it just smacks of "holier than thou-ness" to me somehow. :-/ and I go "obviously I'm more accepting of him than he is of me" in the end. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite3" alt=":(" title="Frown :(" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":(" /></p><p></p><p>As to the kids...I gotta say I always find it so shallow too to hear men of that age say no kids (but I want kids), in that most women unless you're going for one who is CONSIDERABLY younger (which is possible...) by 40+ have had a kid or more and the term "cutting off your nose to spite your face" comes to mind. You can glance over and away from a WONDERFUL woman because you aren't willing to consider a woman who has kids?</p><p></p><p>I read the classifieds regularly in the newspaper because they're the one thing I have the patience to read through an entire ad (that or headlines or horoscopes)...this in Punjabi. And I just find it sooooooo shallow the number of people who are posting asking for a "sohni sukhi" (beautiful) wife for an Amritdhari Sikh.</p><p></p><p>Beauty fades. Fast sometimes.</p><p></p><p>If I were Amritdhari guy posting <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /> I would be asking for a wife who respects MY beliefs and honours them. Has a good heart. Isn't overly argumentative. Will treat my parents well. Is well educated with a good sense of humour. Things like that. I wouldn't care about her looks AND THAT INCLUDES whether she cuts her hair or not, or has a double chin or a giant mole in the middle of her left cheek.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="namritanevaeh, post: 207210, member: 18793"] I'm coming back to this having re-read it and thinking it pertains to a friend I have currently. He's single and looking. He thought the other day he wasn't picky. And then listed that he wanted someone who's vegetarian, doesn't cut her hair and doesn't have kids. And he's 40-ish. And I'm eventually going to go back and chat again on this subject but I felt that is actually pretty picky. I TOTALLY understand him wanting her vegetarian. In a religious sense. But he said it would gross him out to see her eating meat. And I'm like...my ex grossed me out by eating Parmesan cheese (nasty stuff!). But that's not why I divorced him. ;) feeling something is nasty is fine, but it's also possible to do something like eat meat only when he's not there. Just as an example. I GET that he wouldn't want that, so I'm not really debating it. I've never eaten meat in front of my man friend, and he knows I eat meat but I do it when he's not there, out of respect. But the hair thing I dunno I can't get it! Like, if you want "me" (meaning whatever people there are on this earth) to respect that "you" don't want to cut your hair, for religious reasons, that's great, and I personally do and I love my man friend in all his hairy glory. But I want the same respect that I don't need to follow that even if I will defend "your" right to wear a turban and keep your hair long, and defend it FIERCELY. I kinda go "are we all one people or are we not?". If we separate people out into "has long hair" and "doesn't" to my mind it comes down to a caste thing. If you can accept that your coworker and maybe even your best friend isn't a fully practicing Sikh and maybe isn't Sikh at all, why can't you accept that your wife isn't? AS LONG AS SHE RESPECTS YOUR PERSONAL NEED TO BE SIKH? Like it just smacks of "holier than thou-ness" to me somehow. :-/ and I go "obviously I'm more accepting of him than he is of me" in the end. :( As to the kids...I gotta say I always find it so shallow too to hear men of that age say no kids (but I want kids), in that most women unless you're going for one who is CONSIDERABLY younger (which is possible...) by 40+ have had a kid or more and the term "cutting off your nose to spite your face" comes to mind. You can glance over and away from a WONDERFUL woman because you aren't willing to consider a woman who has kids? I read the classifieds regularly in the newspaper because they're the one thing I have the patience to read through an entire ad (that or headlines or horoscopes)...this in Punjabi. And I just find it sooooooo shallow the number of people who are posting asking for a "sohni sukhi" (beautiful) wife for an Amritdhari Sikh. Beauty fades. Fast sometimes. If I were Amritdhari guy posting ;) I would be asking for a wife who respects MY beliefs and honours them. Has a good heart. Isn't overly argumentative. Will treat my parents well. Is well educated with a good sense of humour. Things like that. I wouldn't care about her looks AND THAT INCLUDES whether she cuts her hair or not, or has a double chin or a giant mole in the middle of her left cheek. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Social Lounge
Relationships
Hypocrisy In Choosing Partners?
This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
Accept
Learn more…
Top