• Welcome to all New Sikh Philosophy Network Forums!
    Explore Sikh Sikhi Sikhism...
    Sign up Log in

URGENT PLZZ HELP: KAAM LUST BODY MASSAGE SPA ISSUE

patit

SPNer
Jul 9, 2015
3
6
36
wjkk wjkf, i m 29 from mumbai. unmarried amritdhari sikh( as far as kakaars) i got amrit when i was 16 it started off quite great with me learning all nitnem banis and doing them regularly from last 5-6 years kaam has taken over me.. i am still virgin (not penetrative sex)

Screen Shot 2015-07-09 at 6.01.33 PM.png


but have done everything like foreplay

career wise nothing there as i failed in many businesses

3 years back i went to a spa for massage , i was in stress

felt good by female touch

ever since have been going regurly for massge and happy ending with females..

have wasted my more than 6-8 lakhs of family money by lies and dishonesty...

im very guilt ridden... at heart im attached to my guru..n very emotional ..

kirtan n siran makes me weep and drenched but then side lust side is affecting me

cannot get married till i find a proper career/business / job

i waant to be same as i was before..

i had amritvela/ had sangat/ had bandagi..

now just have vikaar

nothing else..
please help me

my brothers and sisters

wjkk wjkf
 
Last edited by a moderator:

chazSingh

Writer
SPNer
Feb 20, 2012
1,644
1,643
you wrote "i had amritvela/ had sangat/ had bandagi.."

Whats stopping you from beginning this again?

are you in the massage parlour all day? :)

Lust is probably one of the biggest problems we have...it drives the world mad...

the lust is in your mind...which your body reflects....

go to the source....your mind.....you have to fight it...but not beat yourself everytime you fall prey to it...

there are shabads in Gurbani telling you the solution...

i will try and find some. you have to do heartfelt ardaas...only sat guru can really cool your Lust...but you need to make effort yourself also...biggest thing which helped me is to have other interests...do more seva...feed the homeless...get your mind onto thinking about more useful things...slowly and surely it will start to have less impact on your life...learn a martial art...go to the gym...have some targets in your life.

no one on this forum can stop this for you....there is no happy ending here :)
 

Harry Haller

Panga Master
SPNer
Jan 31, 2011
5,769
8,194
54
If I may offer some pragmatic advice

im 29 from mumbai. unmarried amritdhari sikh( as far as kakaars)

get married

i got amrit when i was 16

it started off quite great with me learning all nitnem banis and doing them reguarly

from last 5-6 years kaam has taken over me..

nope, you have allowed bad habits to control you, now you have an addiction

im still virgin( not penetrative sex)

good, your not quite lost yet, you clearly have some control, you now have to move that slider back.
career wise nothing there as i failed in many businesses

your minds not on it, all you can think of is the next fix

3 years back i went to a spa for massage , i was in stresss

felt good by female touch

ever since have been going regurly for massge and happy ending with females..

have wasted my more than 6-8 lakhs of family money by lies and dishonesty...

im very guilt ridden... at heart im attached to my guru..n very emotional ..

kirtan n siran makes me weep and drenched but then side lust side is affecting me

cannot get married till i find a proper career/business / job

i waant to be same as i was before..

lust=misery
no lust=initially boring but peaceful

make your choice, but once you have made it, at least be a man about it, so your a slave to your lust, fine, stand up and be a man about it, if you cannot, then this life is not for you, if you cannot be proud of who you are, be someone who you can be proud of, its your choice
 

Harry Haller

Panga Master
SPNer
Jan 31, 2011
5,769
8,194
54
go to the source....your mind.....you have to fight it...but not beat yourself everytime you fall prey to it...

actually, that's not a bad idea, do what the rest of us have to do when your feeling in that 'mode' afterwards you will wonder what all the fuss was about and get on with your day, and I am not even kidding! A good pragmatic thing to do in the first instance, is every time you get that feeling in your stomach, do what you have to do, believe me, no shame, no lost money, no wasted time, 5 mins and then your free. After which, the next stage, understand yourself, who are you? what are you about? are you going to allow yourself to be defined by something you have full control over? Some men are driven to be sex addicts, are you one of them? helpless? a slave? is there more to you than this?

first off, no more massages, get your self respect back, and as with all habits, it will cease to sing to you. If it doesn't, and you've tried everything, well welcome to a world I have known of old, welcome to hell
 
Last edited:

ActsOfGod

Writer
SPNer
Aug 13, 2012
387
527
i waant to be same as i was before..

i had amritvela/ had sangat/ had bandagi..

now just have vikaar

nothing else..
please help me

You will surely overcome this obstacle in your life. You are not the first to face it and will certainly not be the last. Make a resolution to conquer this issue and in the future you can be a role model to young Amritdhari men who are going through the same challenges.

To begin, do not let yourself be destroyed by the guilt. You must be feeling very terrible right now, but in order to make progress and really get rid of this habit, you will need all your mental and psychological resources. You must learn and understand what's going on in your mind and body, and not just be a slave to animal instincts. Guilt is an emotion which is there to send a message to you that you have violated your own standards. So acknowledge it, learn from it, repair what is broken and move on. It won't do you or anyone else any good to wallow in guilt or get depressed. If you really love Guru Sahib, and you really want to follow him, then it's time to get smart, get prepared to do whatever it takes, and to take action.

Think about what kind of person you want to be. Someday in the future you might be married, and have children. Imagine yourself now, in this condition, ravaged and beaten by lust, completely defeated. How do you think your son or daughter would view someone like this? Would they look up to such a man? Would they honor and respect him? Or would they be disgusted and ashamed? Which do you want?

Lust destroys everything in your life. Would your future wife feel proud of you if she saw you now, visiting the massage parlors? Would you be a hero in her eyes, or would she be disappointed, ashamed, saddened, let down? Just because you haven't met her yet doesn't mean she doesn't exist. She is somewhere, perhaps completing her studies, or working. Eventually you will meet. When you do, what kind of man do you want her to see?

Even though you may not be married or have any children now, these are all possibilities and potential for your future. Potential which you are destroying every time you engage in lust. It's not because of a lack of career/job that you can't get married. It's because of this lust. It will destroy everything in your life.

As others have pointed out, Gurbani has a lot to say on this subject. Spend some time reading from Gurbani and you will see this for yourself. Guru Sahib says that for a moment of sexual pleasure, a mortal will have to suffer for millions of days. [SGGS, Ang 403, shabad is copied below]

Think about what you really want in your life. Loving spouse. Family, children, good career/business. In order to achieve all those things, you must begin now. If you keep on engaging in lust, you will soon find that the days of your life and running short, and that you will have achieved nothing of what you really want.

Become a Sikh that your future wife will be proud of, someone she honors and admires and respects. And become that kind of man whom your children will be proud to call their father.

You have the best guidance in the world. Remember that Guru Sahib is ever-forgiving, we cannot even fathom the depth of their mercy. Do Ardas from your heart for Guru Sahib to help you, and then take specific action steps to deal with this issue of lust in your life. It will be a struggle, as is it for every man, but without the struggle, there cannot be any victory. You must emerge victorious. Guru Sahib says in Japji Sahib, "Man jeetai jag jeet". Conquer your mind. This is the most difficult task. But this is what you must do. Your whole life depends on it.

You are not alone. And even though it may seem hopeless to you right now, there is a way to do this. And you can succeed. You really can.

And if you have any doubt, just remember the story of the great warrior Bhai Joga Singh. Guru Sahib himself came to protect him. Guru Sahib will also protect you. Have some faith.

If you want concrete, specific action steps, you can start with these:

1. Study the Rehat, and notice how it prescribes the daily routine ("Nit-nem"). Make a concrete decision to follow this schedule. Wake up as early as your can every day and read the panj bania. In the evening, read Rehraas Sahib, and at night before sleeping, recite the Sohila. Do Ardas to thank Guru Sahib for assisting you at all times. The more times in a day you are reading Bani, the more it will help you by keeping your mind focused.

2. Write down some near-term (<1 month) and longer term (1 year, 5 years, 10 years) goals. Think about what you want in life. Life is fleeting. Soon, you will be an old man. Do you want to come to old age and realize that you had just wasted your life away in Lust? When you have your goals written down, immediately start taking action to achieve them, even small tiny steps. Any step forward is progress. Be determined. Your time is now, there is no tomorrow. Don't get sidetracked or distracted. Focus. Build your future. If you fail at a task, learn from it, and try again. Don't give up.

3. Do things to improve yourself. Exercise, eat better (more healthy foods), meditate more. Help people who are less fortunate than you. Do seva. Start in the Gurudwara if you don't know where else to go.

4. Change the group of people you are hanging out with. Find some GurSikhs and try to spend some time with them. Ask them about Sikhi, learn about our history and Guru Sahib's lives. Learn.

If you find yourself making progress and then backsliding (one step forward, two steps back), don't beat yourself up. Pick yourself up, learn from what what wrong, and try again. Keep trying. Don't ever give up. The 5 thieves are cunning and they will tie a man down and rob him of everything worthwhile in life. And when the time comes to leave this Earth, they will disappear and leave him bereft and in total misery.

Read as much Gurbani as you can. Make sincere efforts to understand it. You will learn not only how to conquer the 5 thieves, but Guru Sahib will give you the meaning of life itself. Who else can be so benevolent and loving?

I hope this helps you. If you have any questions, please ask.

Guru Sahib kirpa karan.

[AoG]


ਆਸਾ ਮਹਲਾ ੫ ॥
Aasaa, Fifth Mehl:

ਨਿਮਖ ਕਾਮ ਸੁਆਦ ਕਾਰਣਿ ਕੋਟਿ ਦਿਨਸ ਦੁਖੁ ਪਾਵਹਿ ॥
For a moment of sexual pleasure, you shall suffer in pain for millions of days.

ਘਰੀ ਮੁਹਤ ਰੰਗ ਮਾਣਹਿ ਫਿਰਿ ਬਹੁਰਿ ਬਹੁਰਿ ਪਛੁਤਾਵਹਿ ॥੧॥
For an instant, you may savor pleasure, but afterwards, you shall regret it, again and again. ||1||

ਅੰਧੇ ਚੇਤਿ ਹਰਿ ਹਰਿ ਰਾਇਆ ॥
O blind man, meditate on the Lord, the Lord, your King.

ਤੇਰਾ ਸੋ ਦਿਨੁ ਨੇੜੈ ਆਇਆ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥
Your day is drawing near. ||1||Pause||

ਪਲਕ ਦ੍ਰਿਸਟਿ ਦੇਖਿ ਭੂਲੋ ਆਕ ਨੀਮ ਕੋ ਤੂੰਮਰੁ ॥
You are deceived, beholding with your eyes, the bitter melon and swallow-wort.

ਜੈਸਾ ਸੰਗੁ ਬਿਸੀਅਰ ਸਿਉ ਹੈ ਰੇ ਤੈਸੋ ਹੀ ਇਹੁ ਪਰ ਗ੍ਰਿਹੁ ॥੨॥
But, like the companionship of a poisonous snake, so is the desire for another's spouse. ||2||

ਬੈਰੀ ਕਾਰਣਿ ਪਾਪ ਕਰਤਾ ਬਸਤੁ ਰਹੀ ਅਮਾਨਾ ॥
For the sake of your enemy, you commit sins, while you neglect the reality of your faith.

ਛੋਡਿ ਜਾਹਿ ਤਿਨ ਹੀ ਸਿਉ ਸੰਗੀ ਸਾਜਨ ਸਿਉ ਬੈਰਾਨਾ ॥੩॥
Your friendship is with those who abandon you, and you are angry with your friends. ||3||

ਸਗਲ ਸੰਸਾਰੁ ਇਹੈ ਬਿਧਿ ਬਿਆਪਿਓ ਸੋ ਉਬਰਿਓ ਜਿਸੁ ਗੁਰੁ ਪੂਰਾ ॥
The entire world is entangled in this way; he alone is saved, who has the Perfect Guru.

ਕਹੁ ਨਾਨਕ ਭਵ ਸਾਗਰੁ ਤਰਿਓ ਭਏ ਪੁਨੀਤ ਸਰੀਰਾ ॥੪॥੫॥੧੨੭॥
Says Nanak, I have crossed over the terrifying world-ocean; my body has become sanctified. ||4||5||127||
 

JourneyOflife

Writer
SPNer
Apr 8, 2015
49
71
34
My honest advice-and I'm being dead serious about this-is that the next time you feel the need to go get a "massage" because you are craving female touch, instead of wasting further hundreds of thousands of rupees (money that could be spent on education, feeding the hungry, helping spread Sikhi), just go somewhere you know you'll have privacy and masturbate.

Yes, I know it is taboo in conservative cultures like Punjab, yes I know there are Sikhs who may disagree with me on this, but the truth of the matter is that for most people, quitting cold-turkey just doesn't work because their brains have been wired to be addicted to the pleasure in a way a drug addict is addicted to the needle. Telling this guy to stop going to get these massages without giving him an alternative is never going to work. I've had people complain to me about porn addictions, and the advice I always gave was "next time you feel like watching porn, just go masturbate. Even if you have to masturbate 5 times a day, do what you have to do to keep yourself away from porn". And I have to say, it works very well. After a few weeks your brain realizes that it doesn't need porn for pleasure anymore, and the craving to view the material goes down. From there, you can work on limiting the number of times you masturbate per week while simultaneously increasing your focus on Naam, Simran, Bani and Seva. Eventually you could probably stop it altogether, if that is what you wanted.

So OP, go masturbate whenever you feel the need to visit one these masseuses. Even if it means masturbating 5 times per day (DON'T WATCH PORN!!!!!). Let your brain detox and understand that you don't need to dish out a ton of money to relieve these urges, you can do it by yourself. Wait a few weeks and watch how your need to go to a massage parlor goes down. From there, like I previously mentioned, you can work on further controlling your sexual desire by increasing Sikhi in your life.
 

patit

SPNer
Jul 9, 2015
3
6
36
thank u every one for your replpy.. i truly appreciate it n make it a point to follow it your advices and guidelnes..... you all have been gentle to me just like gurusaheb... thank u so much.... may no one get into a situation like me ever....
as per my experience i want to say wen u go away from daily nitnem and gurudwara hazri... all this happens....
 

Harry Haller

Panga Master
SPNer
Jan 31, 2011
5,769
8,194
54
thank u every one for your replpy.. i truly appreciate it n make it a point to follow it your advices and guidelnes..... you all have been gentle to me just like gurusaheb... thank u so much.... may no one get into a situation like me ever....
as per my experience i want to say wen u go away from daily nitnem and gurudwara hazri... all this happens....

Sikhs are not controlled, Sikhs are free, just be careful what you wish for
 

Harry Haller

Panga Master
SPNer
Jan 31, 2011
5,769
8,194
54
may no one get into a situation like me ever....
as per my experience i want to say wen u go away from daily nitnem and gurudwara hazri... all this happens....


There is no sin in Sikhism, every action and thought either brings us closer to connection, or further away. Ritualistic mumbling with no understanding, going to Gurudwara out of fear are all, in my view, forms of control. I also detect a lack of responsibility for your actions, ie, its not your fault you did what you did, its because you did not follow certain rituals and ceremonies, and this is what happens.

my own opinion
 

chazSingh

Writer
SPNer
Feb 20, 2012
1,644
1,643
thank u every one for your replpy.. i truly appreciate it n make it a point to follow it your advices and guidelnes..... you all have been gentle to me just like gurusaheb... thank u so much.... may no one get into a situation like me ever....
as per my experience i want to say wen u go away from daily nitnem and gurudwara hazri... all this happens....

it is because your mind has formed many habits...they take a lot of effort and hard work to change...
the more occupied your mind is with other things...like seva, work, sports etc etc...the less the habits will affect you.

and ofcourse their is His Gurparsaad...so always do your ardaas....open up and tell waheguru your situation and that you want it changing...
the biggest change happens when He glances His grace...
 

ActsOfGod

Writer
SPNer
Aug 13, 2012
387
527
[Source: http://www.sacred-texts.com/skh/tsr1/tsr108.htm]

There was at that time a shopkeeper whose mind had taken a religious bent, and who desired to meet a religious guide. He heard of Guru Nanak's arrival, and vowed that he would not eat or drink until he had had all interview with him. Having once visited the Guru he continually went to him to receive religious instruction.

A neighbouring shopkeeper heard of his friend's visits, and said that he too would go to see the holy man. They proceeded together, but on the way the second shopkeeper saw a woman of whom he became enamoured, and his visit to Nanak was indefinitely postponed. It was the custom of both to set out together, one to visit his mistress, and the other to visit the Guru.

The second shopkeeper desired to put the fortunes of both to the test, and said, 'Thou practisest good works, while I practise bad works. Let us see what shall happen to each of us to-day. If I arrive first, I will sit down and wait for thee; and if thou arrive first, then wait for me.' This was agreed upon. The second shopkeeper went to the house of his mistress as usual, but did not find her. He then proceeded to the spot where his friend had agreed to meet him, but his friend, who on that day tarried long with the Guru, had not yet arrived. The second shopkeeper needing some occupation in his solitude, drew out his knife and began to whittle the ground with it, when he found a shining gold coin. He continued his excavations with the weak delving implement he possessed, when, to his disappointment, he only discovered a jar of charcoal. He had, however, obtained some reward for his labour. Meanwhile the first shopkeeper arrived in doleful case. Having left the Guru, a thorn pierced his foot. He bound up the wound, and proceeded sore limping to the trysting-place. His friend told him of his better fortune. They both saw that he who went daily to commit sin prospered, while he who went to his religious teacher to pray and meditate on God, suffered; and they agreed to refer to Guru Nanak for an explanation of their unequal and unmerited fates.

The Guru explained that the sinful shopkeeper had in a former birth given a gold coin as alms to a holy man. That coin was converted into many gold coins as a reward for the alms-giver, but, when he entered on his career of sin, the gold coins were turned into charcoal. The original gold coin was, however, restored. The shopkeeper who visited the Guru, had deserved to die by an impaling stake for the sins of deceit and usury, but, as be continued to progress in virtue, the impaling stake was reduced in size till it became merely a thorn. Having been pierced by it, he had fully expiated the sins of a former birth. Thus may the decree of destiny be altered by the practice of virtue. Both men were thoroughly satisfied with this explanation of unequal retribution. The sinful as well as the virtuous man fell at Guru Nanak's feet, and both became true worshippers of God. The Guru then uttered the following verses:--

The heart is the paper, conduct the ink;[1] good and bad are both recorded therewith.
Man's life is as his acts constrain him; there is no limit to Thy praises, O God.
O fool, why callest thou not to mind Thy Creator?
Thy virtues have dissolved away by thy forgetfulness of God.
Night is a small net, day a large one; there are as many meshes as there are gharis in the day.
With relish thou ever peckest at the bait, and art ensnared O fool, by what skill shalt thou escape?
The body is the furnace, the mind the iron therein; five fires[2] are ever applied to it.
Sin is the charcoal added thereto, by which the mind is heated; anxiety is the pincers.
The mind hath turned into dross, but it shall again become gold when it meeteth such a Guru
As will bestow the ambrosial name of the one God; then, Nanak, the mind shall become fixed.[3]

[1. Literally--Conduct---heart being the paper--the ink.
2. The deadly sins.
3. Mâru.]

[Source: http://www.sacred-texts.com/skh/tsr1/tsr108.htm]

For reference, the above Shabad is in Maru raag, Ang 990:


ਮਾਰੂ ਮਹਲਾ ੧ ਘਰੁ ੧ ॥
Maaroo, First Mehl, First House:

ਕਰਣੀ ਕਾਗਦੁ ਮਨੁ ਮਸਵਾਣੀ ਬੁਰਾ ਭਲਾ ਦੁਇ ਲੇਖ ਪਏ ॥
Actions are the paper, and the mind is the ink; good and bad are both recorded upon it.

ਜਿਉ ਜਿਉ ਕਿਰਤੁ ਚਲਾਏ ਤਿਉ ਚਲੀਐ ਤਉ ਗੁਣ ਨਾਹੀ ਅੰਤੁ ਹਰੇ ॥੧॥
As their past actions drive them, so are mortals driven. There is no end to Your Glorious Virtues, Lord. ||1||

ਚਿਤ ਚੇਤਸਿ ਕੀ ਨਹੀ ਬਾਵਰਿਆ ॥
Why do you not keep Him in your consciousness, you mad man?

ਹਰਿ ਬਿਸਰਤ ਤੇਰੇ ਗੁਣ ਗਲਿਆ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥
Forgetting the Lord, your own virtues shall rot away. ||1||Pause||

ਜਾਲੀ ਰੈਨਿ ਜਾਲੁ ਦਿਨੁ ਹੂਆ ਜੇਤੀ ਘੜੀ ਫਾਹੀ ਤੇਤੀ ॥
The night is a net, and the day is a net; there are as many traps as there are moments.

ਰਸਿ ਰਸਿ ਚੋਗ ਚੁਗਹਿ ਨਿਤ ਫਾਸਹਿ ਛੂਟਸਿ ਮੂੜੇ ਕਵਨ ਗੁਣੀ ॥੨॥
With relish and delight, you continually bite at the bait; you are trapped, you fool - how will you ever escape? ||2||

ਕਾਇਆ ਆਰਣੁ ਮਨੁ ਵਿਚਿ ਲੋਹਾ ਪੰਚ ਅਗਨਿ ਤਿਤੁ ਲਾਗਿ ਰਹੀ ॥
The body is a furnace, and the mind is the iron within it; the five fires are heating it.

ਕੋਇਲੇ ਪਾਪ ਪੜੇ ਤਿਸੁ ਊਪਰਿ ਮਨੁ ਜਲਿਆ ਸੰਨ੍ਹ੍ਹੀ ਚਿੰਤ ਭਈ ॥੩॥
Sin is the charcoal placed upon it, which burns the mind; the tongs are anxiety and worry. ||3||

ਭਇਆ ਮਨੂਰੁ ਕੰਚਨੁ ਫਿਰਿ ਹੋਵੈ ਜੇ ਗੁਰੁ ਮਿਲੈ ਤਿਨੇਹਾ ॥
What was turned to slag is again transformed into gold, if one meets with the Guru.

ਏਕੁ ਨਾਮੁ ਅੰਮ੍ਰਿਤੁ ਓਹੁ ਦੇਵੈ ਤਉ ਨਾਨਕ ਤ੍ਰਿਸਟਸਿ ਦੇਹਾ ॥੪॥੩॥
He blesses the mortal with the Ambrosial Name of the One Lord, and then, O Nanak, the body is held steady. ||4||3||
 

Harry Haller

Panga Master
SPNer
Jan 31, 2011
5,769
8,194
54
[Source: http://www.sacred-texts.com/skh/tsr1/tsr108.htm]

There was at that time a shopkeeper whose mind had taken a religious bent, and who desired to meet a religious guide. He heard of Guru Nanak's arrival, and vowed that he would not eat or drink until he had had all interview with him. Having once visited the Guru he continually went to him to receive religious instruction.

A neighbouring shopkeeper heard of his friend's visits, and said that he too would go to see the holy man. They proceeded together, but on the way the second shopkeeper saw a woman of whom he became enamoured, and his visit to Nanak was indefinitely postponed. It was the custom of both to set out together, one to visit his mistress, and the other to visit the Guru.

The second shopkeeper desired to put the fortunes of both to the test, and said, 'Thou practisest good works, while I practise bad works. Let us see what shall happen to each of us to-day. If I arrive first, I will sit down and wait for thee; and if thou arrive first, then wait for me.' This was agreed upon. The second shopkeeper went to the house of his mistress as usual, but did not find her. He then proceeded to the spot where his friend had agreed to meet him, but his friend, who on that day tarried long with the Guru, had not yet arrived. The second shopkeeper needing some occupation in his solitude, drew out his knife and began to whittle the ground with it, when he found a shining gold coin. He continued his excavations with the weak delving implement he possessed, when, to his disappointment, he only discovered a jar of charcoal. He had, however, obtained some reward for his labour. Meanwhile the first shopkeeper arrived in doleful case. Having left the Guru, a thorn pierced his foot. He bound up the wound, and proceeded sore limping to the trysting-place. His friend told him of his better fortune. They both saw that he who went daily to commit sin prospered, while he who went to his religious teacher to pray and meditate on God, suffered; and they agreed to refer to Guru Nanak for an explanation of their unequal and unmerited fates.

The Guru explained that the sinful shopkeeper had in a former birth given a gold coin as alms to a holy man. That coin was converted into many gold coins as a reward for the alms-giver, but, when he entered on his career of sin, the gold coins were turned into charcoal. The original gold coin was, however, restored. The shopkeeper who visited the Guru, had deserved to die by an impaling stake for the sins of deceit and usury, but, as be continued to progress in virtue, the impaling stake was reduced in size till it became merely a thorn. Having been pierced by it, he had fully expiated the sins of a former birth. Thus may the decree of destiny be altered by the practice of virtue. Both men were thoroughly satisfied with this explanation of unequal retribution. The sinful as well as the virtuous man fell at Guru Nanak's feet, and both became true worshippers of God. The Guru then uttered the following verses:--

The heart is the paper, conduct the ink;[1] good and bad are both recorded therewith.
Man's life is as his acts constrain him; there is no limit to Thy praises, O God.
O fool, why callest thou not to mind Thy Creator?
Thy virtues have dissolved away by thy forgetfulness of God.
Night is a small net, day a large one; there are as many meshes as there are gharis in the day.
With relish thou ever peckest at the bait, and art ensnared O fool, by what skill shalt thou escape?
The body is the furnace, the mind the iron therein; five fires[2] are ever applied to it.
Sin is the charcoal added thereto, by which the mind is heated; anxiety is the pincers.
The mind hath turned into dross, but it shall again become gold when it meeteth such a Guru
As will bestow the ambrosial name of the one God; then, Nanak, the mind shall become fixed.[3]

[1. Literally--Conduct---heart being the paper--the ink.
2. The deadly sins.
3. Mâru.]

[Source: http://www.sacred-texts.com/skh/tsr1/tsr108.htm]

For reference, the above Shabad is in Maru raag, Ang 990:


ਮਾਰੂ ਮਹਲਾ ੧ ਘਰੁ ੧ ॥
Maaroo, First Mehl, First House:

ਕਰਣੀ ਕਾਗਦੁ ਮਨੁ ਮਸਵਾਣੀ ਬੁਰਾ ਭਲਾ ਦੁਇ ਲੇਖ ਪਏ ॥
Actions are the paper, and the mind is the ink; good and bad are both recorded upon it.

ਜਿਉ ਜਿਉ ਕਿਰਤੁ ਚਲਾਏ ਤਿਉ ਚਲੀਐ ਤਉ ਗੁਣ ਨਾਹੀ ਅੰਤੁ ਹਰੇ ॥੧॥
As their past actions drive them, so are mortals driven. There is no end to Your Glorious Virtues, Lord. ||1||

ਚਿਤ ਚੇਤਸਿ ਕੀ ਨਹੀ ਬਾਵਰਿਆ ॥
Why do you not keep Him in your consciousness, you mad man?

ਹਰਿ ਬਿਸਰਤ ਤੇਰੇ ਗੁਣ ਗਲਿਆ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥
Forgetting the Lord, your own virtues shall rot away. ||1||Pause||

ਜਾਲੀ ਰੈਨਿ ਜਾਲੁ ਦਿਨੁ ਹੂਆ ਜੇਤੀ ਘੜੀ ਫਾਹੀ ਤੇਤੀ ॥
The night is a net, and the day is a net; there are as many traps as there are moments.

ਰਸਿ ਰਸਿ ਚੋਗ ਚੁਗਹਿ ਨਿਤ ਫਾਸਹਿ ਛੂਟਸਿ ਮੂੜੇ ਕਵਨ ਗੁਣੀ ॥੨॥
With relish and delight, you continually bite at the bait; you are trapped, you fool - how will you ever escape? ||2||

ਕਾਇਆ ਆਰਣੁ ਮਨੁ ਵਿਚਿ ਲੋਹਾ ਪੰਚ ਅਗਨਿ ਤਿਤੁ ਲਾਗਿ ਰਹੀ ॥
The body is a furnace, and the mind is the iron within it; the five fires are heating it.

ਕੋਇਲੇ ਪਾਪ ਪੜੇ ਤਿਸੁ ਊਪਰਿ ਮਨੁ ਜਲਿਆ ਸੰਨ੍ਹ੍ਹੀ ਚਿੰਤ ਭਈ ॥੩॥
Sin is the charcoal placed upon it, which burns the mind; the tongs are anxiety and worry. ||3||

ਭਇਆ ਮਨੂਰੁ ਕੰਚਨੁ ਫਿਰਿ ਹੋਵੈ ਜੇ ਗੁਰੁ ਮਿਲੈ ਤਿਨੇਹਾ ॥
What was turned to slag is again transformed into gold, if one meets with the Guru.

ਏਕੁ ਨਾਮੁ ਅੰਮ੍ਰਿਤੁ ਓਹੁ ਦੇਵੈ ਤਉ ਨਾਨਕ ਤ੍ਰਿਸਟਸਿ ਦੇਹਾ ॥੪॥੩॥
He blesses the mortal with the Ambrosial Name of the One Lord, and then, O Nanak, the body is held steady. ||4||3||

is this the same Guru Nanak that fought against superstition and ritual? that tried to free people from the Vedic concept of karma? is this the same Sikhism where the concept of sin and divine forgiveness do not exist?
 

thegurwinder

SPNer
Jul 13, 2015
12
0
Just go have sex. Lol, Im probably going to get chastised for this.

Listen this late bloomer thing is just not cool. You want to save some money. Go get a girlfriend. Have sex regularly. Use a freaking condom. Not having sex till your married is such a taboo. Go experience life! Learn what it means to be in a relationship. Stop spending money on happy endings, go to a bar, library, coffee shop and meet a girl. Grab your nutsack (figuratively) and talk to them.

NEWS FLASH: Women love sex just as much as men do.

Failing in many business. Success is not a straight path, its full of twists and turns. Do some research a lot of successful people have failed their way to the top. PEOPLE MAKE MISTAKES, learn from them. Try not to repeat them. Most importantly find something and stick with it. If your going to fail, then FAIL FAST! Nothing is worse then working on something for years and then it fails.
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Harry Haller

Panga Master
SPNer
Jan 31, 2011
5,769
8,194
54
Just go have sex. Lol, Im probably going to get chastised for this.

no, but you will be chastised for the language, bit of respect eh?

Listen this late bloomer thing is just not cool. You want to save some money. Go get a girlfriend. Have sex regularly. Use a freaking condom. Not having sex till your married is such a taboo. Go experience life! Learn what it means to be in a relationship. Stop spending money on happy endings, go to a bar, library, coffee shop and meet a girl. Grab your nutsack (figuratively) and talk to them.

of course because women are just lining up to have no strings sex!

NEWS FLASH: Women love sex just as much as men do.

Your post shows very little respect for women my friend, women happen to be more than a receptacle for male semen...
 

thegurwinder

SPNer
Jul 13, 2015
12
0
no, but you will be chastised for the language, bit of respect eh?
of course because women are just lining up to have no strings sex!
Your post shows very little respect for women my friend, women happen to be more than a receptacle for male semen...


Haha, I don't think I cursed. So I am not sure to which language you are referring to. "Nutsack" can be a little offensive but men have one, it's basic anatomy. I tired my best to be PG, but i'm sorry if I offended you.

As to my post shows very little respect for women. I would have to disagree. I did not say go out there and rape women. I said go get a girlfriend! Then again you don't need one, cause there a tons on women and men who will have sex no strings attached. Oh the news flash was just incase he was scared. And it happens to be true. Ask any woman out there, go ahead. If you don't know this, well consider this a wake up call. They are out there!!! Oh I did preach safe sex, please do use a condom.

I agree women are not receptacles, they are beautiful, kind, caring, nurturing, smart, silly, sassy, unpredictable, and exciting individuals! Did I mention beautiful, I think I did. But there's about 7 billion of us on the planet, how are you supposed to find someone you want to share your life with if you don't date around?
 

Harry Haller

Panga Master
SPNer
Jan 31, 2011
5,769
8,194
54
Haha, I don't think I cursed.
you did, it was removed

"Nutsack" can be a little offensive but men have one, it's basic anatomy
nope thats still there, I have no problem with nutsack,

I tired my best to be PG

sorry this does not make sense tired? PG? you need a cup of tea?

but i'm sorry if I offended you.

not at all, I couldn't care less, however, some young readers are here, as much as it pains, one should be responsible.

As to my post shows very little respect for women. I would have to disagree.

I thought you'd say that

I did not say go out there and rape women.
Just go have sex. Lol, Im probably going to get chastised for this.

just go have sex? what does that exactly mean? date someone for a few months and see if you are compatible enough to be lovers? pay for it? force yourself? use trickery and flattery and then {censored} off? trouble you see is, just going to have sex is not particularly Sikh. It is a complete and utter surrender to lust.

[
Then again you don't need one, cause there a tons on women and men who will have sex no strings attached.

what about emotions? do they have emotions? families? herpes? what about herpes? Are such people who will have sex no strings good people? are they responsible? can we learn anything from them?

Oh the news flash was just incase he was scared

course he is scared, he has good reason to be,he is trying to get back to the light, all you are doing is dangling the dark.If it works for you, great, knock yourself out, but why encourage it?

Ask any woman out there, go ahead

well I have asked my wife, the butchers wife, my sister in law, afraid the results are a resounding NO, they would have not be interested in no strings sex,.

I agree women are not receptacles, they are beautiful, kind, caring, nurturing, smart, silly, sassy, unpredictable, and exciting individuals! Did I mention beautiful, I think I did. But there's about 7 billion of us on the planet, how are you supposed to find someone you want to share your life with if you don't date around?

Do you know how heartbreaking it is to finally meet someone, and then be rejected because they are number 129, no you probably don't. Date around to your hearts joy, but the act of sex deserves some respect.
 

ActsOfGod

Writer
SPNer
Aug 13, 2012
387
527
Just go have sex. Lol, Im probably going to get chastised for this.

Listen this late bloomer thing is just not cool. You want to save some money. Go get a girlfriend. Have sex regularly. Use a freaking condom. Not having sex till your married is such a taboo. Go experience life! Learn what it means to be in a relationship. Stop spending money on happy endings, go to a bar, library, coffee shop and meet a girl. Grab your nutsack (figuratively) and talk to them.

This won't solve the OP's problem. It will just make him even more of a slave to Lust. It will compound his problems and only bring him more misery and anguish.

And if you're really, totally, brutally honest with yourself, then you will realize that the same is true for you.

I urge you to spend some time studying Gurbani. The need is more desperate for you than the OP.

[AoG]
 

thegurwinder

SPNer
Jul 13, 2015
12
0
Well you’ll see I have not edited my post. Blatant accusations.

PG as in PG-13. It’s slang for parental guidance needed under 13. You know as in the movie ratings. But tea sounds delicious. Please and thank you.

As for the younger readers, if they have access to the internet most likely they have seen and read worse. So let’s get off this high horse.

Apparently you cannot read cause I’m pretty sure I wrote I do not condone rape. Nor did I preach it. But to have sex when you are two consenting adults. I see no problem.

Pay for it. Do you take care of your wife? Go to work make money? Take her out? Shower her with flowers and gifts? Buy her things? Make sure there is food on the table. Ok so you just paid for sex. Everyone pays. To say you don’t, you already lied to yourself.

Oh not to mention this tradition of arranged marriage where you two meet and then decide if you wan to marry off a couple interactions. Then consumate the marriage on the night of the wedding. Oh I completely forgot the tradition of dowery most Sikhs still pay during the marriage process. This is more of a rape to me then loving someone of you own free will.

I did mention using a condom. The would is a dangerous place. Oh hey and definitely inspect the area in which you are about to place your family jewels.

I think I’m pretty responsible. I work. I take care of my family. I pay bills and taxes. I go to gurdwaras, not often but I do. Most of the women I been with are the same.

Lol, hey even a blind squirrel finds a nut once in a while. Well you have a very small sample size if you asked three women. Oh I’m pretty sure f you asked married women who living behind this facade of how they are supposed to be they will give you the same answer. Approach a random women you don’t hold in such high regard I’m a random place. One who isn’t afraid to talk or afraid of how and what light you see them in. Oh yes remember to have the right data you must ask all women not just the ones that go to your gurdwaras. Otherwise you sample is convoluted and inconclusive.

I don’t know what number 129 feels like but I know what number 57 feels like. But I don’t understand your logic. Why do you think that cause you are number 129 your rejected. I have been rejected and done some rejection. Eventually you’ll meet that one person who everything will click with.
 

❤️ CLICK HERE TO JOIN SPN MOBILE PLATFORM

❤️ CLICK HERE TO JOIN SPN MOBILE PLATFORM

📌 For all latest updates, follow the Official Sikh Philosophy Network Whatsapp Channel:
Top