Sikh Girls: A Confused Lot. Are Parents To Blame?

[Prabhjyotsaini]

Commanding Dignity and Respect is in ones own hands . People react and respond as you do .

So , are with women .

People don't disrespect all the women , but only react and respond to who do not have self dignity and Self Respect.

Marrying a person of different religion does not render anybody disrespectful, that anyone can come & utter his/her ignorance of ones situation in which one had to make decision to marry a person of the other religion.

Let me quote an example of one of my acquaintance here & that too of a Sikh girls ordeal in hands of a Sikh guy. This girl is from a respectable Sikh family of Delhi & got married to a Canada based Sikh guy. After marriage she had to stay back in India to join her husband later on after completing all the necessary paperwork. Once she joined her husband the folks at her husband place started asking her to divorce her husband since she was a permanene resident of Canada by that time. After divorce she should she should marry one of her husband's cousin in India so that he could come to Canada legally & settle since he couild not study due to his bad company at school & then college. Thus was not getting good respectable job as per his so called family status their in India. The lady in turn did divorced the person but not to marry his cousin but in turn she married one of her colleague at her workplace who happened to be a Cristian. He respect her a lot & do his job at night shift & doesn't let her work at night like she used to work when she was with her Sikh husband.

How will you react to such situation, could you favour her marriage to a Sikh guy who married her just to get safe entry for one of his cousin who was jobless in India or her respectable marriage to a Cristian?

I think its better to stay with a guy who could respect you & your self-respect rahter than a sick mentalitied person of your own religion.

Also it is very easy to percieve as you are doing while in India, I also had the similar views until I was India where we are surrounded by majority of people of our own community, Sikh. But come out & see that Sikh guys here are having sick mentality they think girls as commodity & one can't live with a person of sick mentality just for the reason that he is a Sikh.

 

[Prabhjyotsaini]

Gurfateh

Das had no surcassim but tribute for an objectivity on the mind of DS.

Das has no such capabilty like DS.

You have confused me, please tell me one thing only if whether you endorse DS' views or not. I mean if you also think the same way as DS thinks about women.

 

[devinesanative]

Dear Prabhjyot saini ji

I can understand DAS intent , but you have got confused by our very very very very HIGH LEVEL discussion.

The term disrespect was not used for marrying into other religions , but in some other sense.

One more thing the when canadian parents don't find grooms there , then they come to India .

there are many ending example with me which can expose .........

And regarding POWER and WEALTH , I Bet for Rs 3 crores if I Proved wrong.

 

[devinesanative]

Take it lightly prabhjyot saini ji

Come on Cheer UP ........

 

[devinesanative]

Don't take anything serious ........

 

[Prabhjyotsaini]

Dear Prabhjyot saini ji

I can understand DAS intent , but you have got confused by our very very very very HIGH LEVEL discussion.

The term disrespect was not used for marrying into other religions , but in some other sense.

One more thing the when canadian parents don't find grooms there , then they come to India .

there are many ending example with me which can expose .........

And regarding POWER and WEALTH , I Bet for Rs 3 crores if I Proved wrong.

Even I am not denying the fact rather I am saying that Sikh guys should also work hard to become powerful & wealthy.

 

[devinesanative]

No one has made Woman a Commodity , but Women themselves have made themselves a Commodity.

Men have been made merely scape goats .

Just in India has phobia , that whatever happens in india , pakistan has done it.

So , it is , What ever happens to Women , Men Have done it .


I had a good deal of discussion with many women , they also say that due some short cut type of Women . The whole Woman Community has been maligned.

 

[Prabhjyotsaini]

Dear Prabhjyot saini ji

I can understand DAS intent , but you have got confused by our very very very very HIGH LEVEL discussion.

The term disrespect was not used for marrying into other religions , but in some other sense.

One more thing the when canadian parents don't find grooms there , then they come to India .

there are many ending example with me which can expose .........

And regarding POWER and WEALTH , I Bet for Rs 3 crores if I Proved wrong.

Again repeating the same story guys in India marry a Canadian girl just to get easy entry to Canada not to be a good partners most of the times. Here you can see many girls getting married to Indian guys just to be divorced since after getting settled here guys usually divorce the girl & marry Indian girl who also meet the same fate most of the times.

 

[Prabhjyotsaini]

No one has made Woman a Commodity , but Women themselves have made themselves a Commodity.

Men have been made merely scape goats .

Just in India has phobia , that whatever happens in india , pakistan has done it.

So , it is , What ever happens to Women , Men Have done it .


I had a good deal of discussion with many women , they also say that due some short cut type of Women . The whole Woman Community has been maligned.

Number of such women is less & still you are maligning the whole women community . Whereas number of opportunistic men is more but still you people are not ready to accept it.

 

[devinesanative]

This is all the game of POWER and WEALTH , which creates mismatch couples.

But if relationship could be made on FAITH , TRUST AND LOVE rather than POWER AND WEALTH , then there won't be any divorce .

 

[devinesanative]

Dear Das ji

We really Miss you here .

The story is very Thrilling , romantic with hightened Climax ...........

 

[devinesanative]

Dear prabhjyot saini ji

As you have said that many Indian guys marry canadian girls for easy entry to canada .

But let me tell one thing ,why should a clever and smart guy marry legally , where there are many professionals to do the same .

A whole bunch of professional marriage industry runs .

Only Cowards Leave India because they cannot withstand the tough environment of India , and still boast of being Sikh .

Building Business Empire abroad is easy , But only daring and courageous Sikhs have the guts to face the tough environment of India and do business.

 

[hpluthera]

I find it deeply disturbing that anyone would suggest it inappropriate to question Sikhism. Imagine if Guru Nanak never questioned Islam or hinduism. Religion evolves with time. To not acknowledge or allow this notion reminds me of the Taliban. I thought we looked to Gurbani to answer our questions in life. How can we get answers if we can't ask questions.

Dear Aman
I find that too much ephasis is given by you for the girls attracting to Muslims and like subjects and then these issues are very unprofessionally handled in casual way. I had placed a reply which did not appear on your site.
Is this site a chat site to direct youths of Sikhs away from Gurbani or a place to attract Sikh youth to find answers to their doubts confutions and ilemmas through Gurbani by exposing them to some thaughts of those who experienced and learnt through Gurbani. Lot of people confuse cultural taboos with religious beliefs. Religions have been reform movements of it times but cultures always dominant. Most of the ancient Religions combines religion with Cultures as the cultures change and are more dominant these religion finds lot of conflicts with in the minds of their youth and other people. Similarly in today's time the cultures of the world particularly the westeren culture is dominant and every religion need revision as they do not fit in with the modern living for a common non religious person who in reality do not understand the fine line of difference between the spirituality and the culture. However we are lucky in Sikhi - which is free from the cultural rituals and practices of one time - sikhi only requires one to Remember thy name in Heart and live truthfully and accepts all humans as children of one.

We often confuse the Order of Khalsa with Sikhi Khalsa is the ultimate Saint Soldier and for the protection of Humanity and at least one out of 125000 population need to become Khalsa as Protector Saint Soldier. Every Sikh need not be Khalsa some may practice to become one as Khalsa is a Great Being who lives selflessly for defence and protection of the weak the operessed. Sikhs who want and are of Khalsa spirit (Not Exterior Look Only) should make a Sarbat Khalsa Resolution and appeal to world power and the UN and their own country of citizenships that they are available to fight for the cause of Humanity. They should not be selling Liqours, Tobacco, or do any corrupt deed etc. Then Khalsa will become Sabu Te Niyara and you will see how many youthw will be pride to get associated with that. Ask the Akali Dal SGPC Akal Takhhat to call a Sarbat Khalsa for this and commit Khalsa for the right cause for which it was formed. Why should not the UN will accept such a great Moral Truthful Brave force to be part of them. only 5% of pouplation os enough to be Army to serve the world for peace ful co existence and let that be Khalsa.

When you use a word as "Sikh Philosophy " it attracts youth to find the real truths and Gurbani Paths that means these people with whatever thinking has some "Chingari" of love to tolearn through their Guru. SO do justice to provide the right "intellectual and Sikh Philosophy Fodder" to allow them ponder over and find their answers. I do not find any responsible answers to many questions which are some times from real confused lots seeking. Unless it is all a show off without any purpose. Action without Purpose is called a stupid move and purpose without passion lead no where, these can in majority of times lead to accidents causing damage. So I would suggest you that rethink and plan what is the purpose of your presence on the web unless it is a website run by an element detrimental to Sikh cause. It is time that you be clear and reveal the people behind it and post your objective.
HP luthera

 

[Arvind]

Dear Aman
I find that too much ephasis is given by you for the girls attracting to Muslims and like subjects and then these issues are very unprofessionally handled in casual way. I had placed a reply which did not appear on your site.
Is this site a chat site to direct youths of Sikhs away from Gurbani or a place to attract Sikh youth to find answers to their doubts confutions and ilemmas through Gurbani by exposing them to some thaughts of those who experienced and learnt through Gurbani. Lot of people confuse cultural taboos with religious beliefs. Religions have been reform movements of it times but cultures always dominant. Most of the ancient Religions combines religion with Cultures as the cultures change and are more dominant these religion finds lot of conflicts with in the minds of their youth and other people. Similarly in today's time the cultures of the world particularly the westeren culture is dominant and every religion need revision as they do not fit in with the modern living for a common non religious person who in reality do not understand the fine line of difference between the spirituality and the culture. However we are lucky in Sikhi - which is free from the cultural rituals and practices of one time - sikhi only requires one to Remember thy name in Heart and live truthfully and accepts all humans as children of one.

We often confuse the Order of Khalsa with Sikhi Khalsa is the ultimate Saint Soldier and for the protection of Humanity and at least one out of 125000 population need to become Khalsa as Protector Saint Soldier. Every Sikh need not be Khalsa some may practice to become one as Khalsa is a Great Being who lives selflessly for defence and protection of the weak the operessed. Sikhs who want and are of Khalsa spirit (Not Exterior Look Only) should make a Sarbat Khalsa Resolution and appeal to world power and the UN and their own country of citizenships that they are available to fight for the cause of Humanity. They should not be selling Liqours, Tobacco, or do any corrupt deed etc. Then Khalsa will become Sabu Te Niyara and you will see how many youthw will be pride to get associated with that. Ask the Akali Dal SGPC Akal Takhhat to call a Sarbat Khalsa for this and commit Khalsa for the right cause for which it was formed. Why should not the UN will accept such a great Moral Truthful Brave force to be part of them. only 5% of pouplation os enough to be Army to serve the world for peace ful co existence and let that be Khalsa.

When you use a word as "Sikh Philosophy " it attracts youth to find the real truths and Gurbani Paths that means these people with whatever thinking has some "Chingari" of love to tolearn through their Guru. SO do justice to provide the right "intellectual and Sikh Philosophy Fodder" to allow them ponder over and find their answers. I do not find any responsible answers to many questions which are some times from real confused lots seeking. Unless it is all a show off without any purpose. Action without Purpose is called a stupid move and purpose without passion lead no where, these can in majority of times lead to accidents causing damage. So I would suggest you that rethink and plan what is the purpose of your presence on the web unless it is a website run by an element detrimental to Sikh cause. It is time that you be clear and reveal the people behind it and post your objective.
HP luthera

Off-Topic (but necessary to be posted here)

Respected HP Luthera ji,

Before Aman veer could reply back, I take this opportunity to share a few thoughts about your concern, as a user as well as forum leader.

First of all, I am curious to what reply of yours didn’t appear on site. Did you post that as a reply to forums or as a personal message?

Our vision is to make this site a place for learning oriented discussions, and NOT make it a chat site. So yes, we welcome people from diverse backgrounds where we respect each other’s views. You can expect a certain percentage of people as trouble makers, which I prefer to ignore personally.

We don’t have answers to all questions raised on forums, as we are in the seeker category ourselves. However with the help of so many learned members here, we gather the essence. In case, you are aware of any answers to the unreplied forums, please share your thoughts there.

This site is out of ‘chingari’ within ourselves to learn more about sikhi, so that we can call ourselves Sikh. A common platform to share. Our purpose is to spread more awareness about Sikhi. The topic you have chosen to write in, is not a good indicator of this though.

You asked about people behind this site… here I am… please check my picture in my avtar. Any more information you need about us, you are welcome veer ji. Sometimes, we don’t provide information publicly just due to obvious reasons of being on internet. I am sure, you understand that.

I hope this answers your quest. We welcome your presence here, and your valuable contribution on SPN forums. We are just one PM away.

Thanks and Regards, Arvind Pal Singh.

 

[hps62]

Dear Aman

I am fully in agreement with what HP luthera has to say.

With a sikh officer now in pakistani army and in some other armies too .

It is high time that UN has a Khalsa brigade / division / under its command derived from the global khalsa community to maintain global peace .

This will free lot of mankind to pursue more pressing problem mankind faces as discussed by me under thread " Modern Sikh Soldiers of the Globe - New "Enemies", "battle fields" & "Weapons" .

WGKWGF

hps62

 

[Prabhjyotsaini]

Dear Aman

I am fully in agreement with what HP luthera has to say.

With a sikh officer now in pakistani army and in some other armies too .

It is high time that UN has a Khalsa brigade / division / under its command derived from the global khalsa community to maintain global peace .

This will free lot of mankind to pursue more pressing problem mankind faces as discussed by me under thread " Modern Sikh Soldiers of the Globe - New "Enemies", "battle fields" & "Weapons" .

WGKWGF

hps62

For that to happen first it is required that we should amend the whole institution & its representative bodies. I mean to say as you must be remembering that former SGPC President Bibi Jagir Kaur denied UN request to register SGPC as NGO working towards welfare & development of Sikhism. This is not for the first time UN asked some institution to register to getrecognised about ones association & its goals. This idea wasdenied by the former president of SGPC, when it is known that all registered associations enjoy UN patronage & funding also to some extent to work & spread their message. Thus I think it was a good platform to let people of world know about Sikh, Sikhi & Sikhism. We have been deprived of the opportunity to become world recognised force by our own corrupt leaders because after getting Un status SGPC was required to work in highly transparent manner. But its president that time was so corrupt that she never wanted all her deeds come into limelight & she should not be deprived of her own lavish lifestyle which was maintained witht the funds of Dharam Prachar Committe of SGPC. This is really shameful that our so called leaders are using funds of our religious associations for their personal luxuries rather than spending it for the purpose for which it is meant to be kept. This is irony of Sikhism at this time. People are required to be motivated to come forward & save Sikhism from such clutter.
Thanks

 

[thinkingoutloud]

new here as i came to learn what sikh people are thinking.I've skimmed throughthis thread and am confused as to why you are equating drinking cutting hair etc.. with sikhi .Surely one is the culture and the other the religion, although the two must overlap at some point one can't define the other.If fallible men/women commit acts that go against the sikh way is that person bad? or is sikhi bad?.

Sikh girls have a golden opportunity here in the u.k . They have freedom not only through the sikh religion but through british law.That freedom can used or abused but that is what freedom is all about.

 

[Pajan Kaur Sandhu]

Hi there well, 1st of all Sikhism mean brave.... So, what u need to do is that dont just rely on ur parents to tech u but go to the net or find the giani ji in ur nearby Gudwara and than ask abt ur question.... I was once like u, i always think that why those muslim knows everything but sikh childern no nothing abt there religion and i found the answer when i visit a friend house..... Guess what those plp ask for every act that they done, they dont just do it like us..... and for ur info sikhism say that there should be no alcohol for guys or girls..... than i question myself, why am i always follow what plp say and never whan to know why i can't do this or that...... i go online for my answer that i find those elderly plp for there comment and i did found my answer..... As a Sikh girl u sholud be braveto go and find out the answer for ur question as there is answer for everything..... if u quit than it mean that u have surrender without even fighting.... i hope that u will not loss the battle as i know that Guru Granth Sahib Ji always give the solutin.... Hoper that u will not be confuse in future..... Gurfateh

 

[hps62]

Dear SPNjini

SSAKAL

Please feel free to move in any direction.

Sikhism is all about freedom to live your life by ones own choice.

Why did you think that our ancestors fought for.

The freedom to choose our way of life .Not to be bulldozed by threat of death or coverted attempt at conversion.

We are a religion which does not impose our will nor do we allow any one else to change our free will.

We do not believe in converting as many else religions do .

We have found the final God the singular one amongst all of us.

So never get hastled .

Freedom is the birthright of SIKH way of life .. Exercise it . It is our forefathers gift to all of us and humanity at large.

hps62

 

[jonnyBravoWarm]

Sat sri AKAL

This is a great thread. A lot to learn. Sikh Girls - a Confused Lot ....... i think sikh boys are a confused lot too. Girls indeed have pressures, but boys have more [ i am not just saying this because i am a boy ]. This is nothing to do with religion. Its the way the society is made up, which ofcouse is changing now. We should stop crying and act like those five people ( who forgot what others would say, what would others think ) and answered guru gobind singh ji's call and became five pyaras... we might have done a lot wrong... but my guru forgives... why cant we be like those 40 singhs who came back to their guru. Just take control of youself ... pray to waheguru and believe me you will survive. Its like the process of purefying Gold. Either you survive or die. Its not just about sikh girls or boys.. its about every sikh.

[ I have attached a small story here. If you could go through it. Please do. Its Beautiful ]