- Jan 31, 2011
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when your mad, when you look in the mirror, and you see the madness, when you see it in the eyes of the people you talk to, then you know your mad, although there is another level, one I never knew about, its the madness when you cannot see it, when even madness feels sane.
The next 24 hours are going to be fun, Tom is off today, he has been nothing short of wonderful since he has started working for me, he had a childhood rooted in model making and assembling kits, so taking apart and putting together laptops is easy, he does it much better than me, he does not even have screws left over!
I ruffle his hair a lot when he does good, I have always said this, if I had ever had a natural son, I would have wanted him to be like Tom, his humour is exactly like mine, watching him grow here in the shop is a magical experience,.
So today no Tom, no need to adopt a cheery persona, today I can be as dark and as miserable as I wish to be, for someone like me, to be these things is a treat, an indulgence, I can sit here and look out the shop window and watch the world go by, a world I am increasingly becoming detached from, a world I am rejecting, leaving behind, no, its not very Sikh is it.
I seem to be hell bent on a path of renunciation, I have not even bought Viz this month, and I have never missed a copy, even whilst in prison, I managed to get a copy of Viz, I am eating lots of porridge, it fills you up, its warm, oh and of course chocolate, have not managed to renounce chocolate,
its 8am, its going to be a long hard day, there is a deadline to respect, I cannot feel my heart, but I know what needs to be done, lets ride!
The next 24 hours are going to be fun, Tom is off today, he has been nothing short of wonderful since he has started working for me, he had a childhood rooted in model making and assembling kits, so taking apart and putting together laptops is easy, he does it much better than me, he does not even have screws left over!
I ruffle his hair a lot when he does good, I have always said this, if I had ever had a natural son, I would have wanted him to be like Tom, his humour is exactly like mine, watching him grow here in the shop is a magical experience,.
So today no Tom, no need to adopt a cheery persona, today I can be as dark and as miserable as I wish to be, for someone like me, to be these things is a treat, an indulgence, I can sit here and look out the shop window and watch the world go by, a world I am increasingly becoming detached from, a world I am rejecting, leaving behind, no, its not very Sikh is it.
I seem to be hell bent on a path of renunciation, I have not even bought Viz this month, and I have never missed a copy, even whilst in prison, I managed to get a copy of Viz, I am eating lots of porridge, it fills you up, its warm, oh and of course chocolate, have not managed to renounce chocolate,
its 8am, its going to be a long hard day, there is a deadline to respect, I cannot feel my heart, but I know what needs to be done, lets ride!
