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Duality-When Does The Screaming Stop?

Discussion in 'Sikh Sikhi Sikhism' started by Harry Haller, May 4, 2015.

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  1. Harry Haller

    Harry Haller United Kingdom
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    Duality, a concept dealt with many religions in many interesting ways, most gloss over the fact that we have within us the blood of Lions, Pigs, Cows, Jackals, and in some even Wolves. Some of the kindest nicest people I know, are also capable of some of the most despicable of acts, in fact, life experience has taught me that the nicer anyone is to you, such is also their capability to be nasty to you. Religions tend to explain this by saying that it is the influence of Satan, or evil spirits, or something that is not really you, something that you have to destroy, to lose.

    duality-a.jpg

    A chap in my shop the other day commented on how honest I was for pointing out straight away the problem with his laptop, and fixing it within a few minutes with no charge, (chocolate does not count as a charge), its not honesty, I replied, it just helps stop the screaming. The screaming, the arguments between the two personalities that are the product of duality, its constant, non stop, the opposition, the arguments, but without each other, I would be consigned to one hell or another. To sit in the middle, to lean towards one end, and then come back and lean on the other, is not so much of a hell, you get used to the screaming after a while, to be honest the screaming is not so bad, not as bad as the singing, the singing is the worst, you drop down one side of duality, find some peace, make a little nest, make some plans, and then the singing starts, from the other side, hypnotic, enticing, until you have no choice but to sit on the fence again, yes the screaming is a relief from the singing.

    The singing and screaming are as bad as they were when I was 13, when it all started, and that was more than 30 years ago, now I could not imagine life without it, there are moments, moments of utter blissful happiness, when I rise into the air like a firework, and my happiness showers and explodes, only to sink to the very depths of despair, melancholy, and always I wear my heart on my sleeve, and in between, just the screaming.

    Being a cog in consonance with Creation helps stop the screaming, writing on this forum also halts it in its tracks, understanding the way of the world, and simply reaching out and helping people, all good antidotes, it is within Sikhism that the answer lies for me, I guess finding Sikhism to me is more than just a way of living, it is the only thing that will stop the screaming, because it understands the dual nature and shows us a way out of it.

    Till then, today, for a while, the screaming has stopped, as has the singing, I have no doubt that later I will hear the soft tones of singing, but until then, I am going to take my dogs for a long walk, and just enjoy something that no one should never lose, or at least have the ability to find every now and then, the innocence.
     
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    #1 Harry Haller, May 4, 2015
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  3. Harry Haller

    Harry Haller United Kingdom
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    A Jehovah's witness came into my shop today, trying to sell me a webpage, I informed him that our web page had won various awards and he would have a hard time making it any better, he asked to look at it, I showed him it, he looked confused, asked which awards it had won, I showed him the printed awards, he looked awkward and then commented that he had never heard of the award companies, so I had to confess to making them up, and admitted I did the site in 3 mins 54 seconds ( I timed myself when I did it).

    To cut a long story short, we talked about his religion, we talked about my view on my religion, every now and then he would stop and say, I know what you are trying to get me to say, but he did great, every response was perfect and by the book, he did the witnesses proud, unfortunately, the same could not be said for his eyes, for all the supposed contentment with his wife, and his kids, his job, his position as an elder, the mouth moved, the hands made gestures, but the eyes, no the eyes have it. The eyes showed the struggle, the struggle of playing a role in a world, a role that had been foisted on him by his own father and probably the father before.

    So what lesson duality have I learned from this, duality exists in all, whether you like it or not, some are just more honest about it than others, maybe some of the others call it a devil, or satan, deny it, make it something that does not belong to them, at least in Sikhism we show some sense by accepting that certain traits appeal to the human brain, and to be cautious and aware of them, we call them the thieves. Deny they exist and feel free to spend the rest of your life as some sort of Zombie, light a few candles, adopt some weird and wonderful ritual to keep them at bay, anything but use your brain, but then in a lot of religions that is discouraged.

    Herman Hesse, a man who understood and could write about duality better than many wrote

    “When I have neither pleasure nor pain and have been breathing for a while the lukewarm insipid air of these so called good and tolerable days, I feel so bad in my childish soul that I smash my moldering lyre of thanksgiving in the face of the slumbering god of contentment and would rather feel the very devil burn in me than this warmth of a well-heated room. A wild longing for strong emotions and sensations seethes in me, a rage against this toneless, flat, normal and sterile life. I have a mad impulse to smash something, a warehouse, perhaps, or a cathedral, or myself, to commit outrages, to pull off the wigs of a few revered idols...”

    I think that sums up duality best, and in my heart, every man I see with dead eyes, is guilty of ignorance rather than understanding, of the desire to create mental cupboards with huge locks rather than face the rather unpleasant and base sides of our personalities, how can you learn if you lock yourself away, how can you increase your understanding, how can you move to one day being whole?
     
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  4. Harry Haller

    Harry Haller United Kingdom
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    The screaming finally stopped, but then so it should have, I have been to the wolf's lair, I have spent a week behaving like the animal I am, and now, exhausted, tired, I long to get away from the smell of blood, earth, dirt, but I cannot, the mustiness follows me everywhere I go, the stale smell of urine, sweat, and how do I feel? Ungodly would be a good word to start with, I yearn for clean sheets, the smell of purity, the company of the pure, to lose myself in a huge vat of fabric conditioner sounds like a good idea at present,.

    Now the singing begins, to get from the South pole to the North pole can take some time, the period of readjustment is painful, as black becomes white, aversion becomes attraction, attraction becomes aversion, just anything, anything to get rid of the smell, the taste of blood, the aches in the legs from the chase of prey, the nightmares, the visions, of prey, bloodied, rotting, dead eyes looking back at you, the disgust, the self hating, the hate..

    Sometimes the journey from pole can take months, sometimes weeks, sometimes days, sometimes hours, before the screaming starts again, and everything happens again, but in reverse, when the taste of honey repulses you, when the clean sheets disgust you, when you would give anything to feel the taste of dirt and bloody again on your tongue,

    but for now, this transformation is one of relief, fatigue and the appreciation of the light. It is different to the other transformation, when one can almost faint from the excitement and expectation.

    Duality, great isn't it.
     
  5. Harry Haller

    Harry Haller United Kingdom
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    I forgot the twilight zone, no mans land, the living death, the feelings of nothingness, emptiness, where nothing calls, where nothing repulses, where everything calls, everything repulses, I am tired, exhausted, I cannot remember what a peaceful nights sleep feels like, I look in the mirror, empty eyes look back at me, eyes that know everything, yet know nothing, eyes that betray the peaks of the highest pleasure, eyes that confirm the deepest pain, in my youth, I would play with death at these times, I would amuse myself by flirting with it, anything for a decent nights sleep, even if it meant embracing the big sleep, the biggest sleep of all, but I only flirted, I saw a bit of deaths thigh, a bit of leg, it never got serious between us....

    But today, even that mild pleasure is boring, mundane, so I relive my life whilst I work on laptops, I find songs that mean something, I rake over the embers of women I have loved, I smile as I remember moments, my eyes moisten as I remember partings, problems, many many white picket fences, my father always used to say to me, the only conclusion is that life is pointless, try never to arrive at that point, even if it means kidding yourself, and then he would laugh, and I would look in his eyes, he knew, of course he knew the utter lack of point in what we call living, eating, sleeping, finding pleasure, happiness,

    I will stay here for a while, the duality can be exhausting, I think a rest would be a good idea.
     
  6. chazSingh

    chazSingh Ireland
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    hey dude..

    enjoy the duality...you're in a good state because you recognize and 'see' the duality...many are immersed in it without even contemplating it..

    duality gives us the relaxation of a warm bath, and the electric bolt of an energizing and healing cold bath...amazing

    when i do Tai Chi...they tell me to focus on the duality....the heavy foot, the light foot, the stressed leg\arm, the relaxed leg \ arm....as you move through the motions and movements...to enjoy that duality to be part of it...we are in that world...

    but Tai Chi also teaches...that you can melt away into that duality and realize its enveloped in 'one'

    i guess Sikhi tells us exactly the same...
     
  7. Sikhilove

    Sikhilove United Kingdom
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    @Harry Haller, I have experienced what you have and still do. I have come to the conclusion that Embracing and enjoying LIFE, but whilst being disciplined is key as well as teaching and performing selfless seva. The highest selfless seva is to detach from the khel and also to teach others out of it.

    It will fill the part of you that feels dark, with love and life force and you will realise that it's your real reason for living.

    9-5 Work (Life)
    6-7 Gym (Body)
    Evening meditate (Spirit)

    In the future, there will be a war, the religious books speak of it, the Illuminati run the world political and business systems and they have planned a world war 3 for hundreds of years.

    Sikhs have a purpose as they did in Guru Gobind Jis times, we seem like sitting ducks for now but sikhs are doing well financially for a reason, its all Gods will...educated and financially well off sikhs have an opportunity to group together and should anything happen, they can be ready. Guru Gobind Ji taught us to be ready for anything at all times, we have had a period of relative peace and history has taught us that peace on earth rarely lasts forever.
     
  8. Harry Haller

    Harry Haller United Kingdom
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    sorry I would beg to differ, seva has to be carried out wisely, our actions affect others in many many ways, one should also question who the seva is for. As for discipline, I struggle with the word never mind the concept.

    I am a dark person, it is only normal I would feel dark, anything else would not feel right, it would feel alien, false, I feel dark because questions remain unanswered, because litmus tests do not lie, I feel dark because innocence is dead. When innocence is once again lauded, maybe I will change.

    how strange, you have actually given times for these, times are no good for me, I don't wear a watch or own a mobile phone, the clock in the car is wrong, the clock behind me is stuck at 3.15, and every clock on every computer in here is also wrong. As you can tell, I do not care much for the concept of time. However, I awake daily at 5am, am in the shop for 5.30am and work through till around 10 or 11pm, I get a workout, as I lift and pack computers all day, and as the evening comes, as it comes now, I sit down for a while and think, as the evening progresses, I think more and more, until around 10pm, I sit down for a while and end up asleep in my chair. I normally wake up around midnight, and then drive home.

    [
     
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  9. broken

    broken United States
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    Precious Brother,

    How good and wonderful it is to stare straightway into the mirror at ourselves and ask, "What the hell am I doing?"

    At times I struggle deeply trying to find the where and what of all this. Everything I was told, everything I know to be true has been a lie. The very foundation of my life is a lie. Perpetuated still to this day. So there's the duality. I think I am this, but truth be told I have no idea really.

    Maybe we all have our own temptress of fulfillment, that thing that says "stay with me and you'll be happy" .... maybe the siren call for each if different but I think we all in some fashion live in two parts.

    Surface and Heart.

    The one thing I know, is that I do not know. Duality is unkind. Can we ever let go? Is it possible to be truly one?
     
  10. Harry Haller

    Harry Haller United Kingdom
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    I suppose it is all down to which 'I' is looking in the mirror, the answer is normally quite simple, I guess the problems stem from how many 'I's there are.

    Your struggling in wild waters, best to relax and just float over the surface water. Float on the surface water and look at the sky instead.
    mine too, great isn't it that we know, many don't
    you are the sum of your 'I's, you are thinking fractured, like the hungry man in the garden filled with a million different types of flowers and 1 cucumber, a hungry man is only interested in the cucumber.
    pah we both know that to be untrue, nothing makes us happy, nothing is perfect, all we know is compromise, it is not the worlds fault, we have come to expect something that does not exist, time to change expectations.
    Why? we are a multi tool, capable of many many things, why limit ourselves to just being a screwdriver because it is 'safe', because then we would truly know what we are, sounds like trying to fit the answer to the question, who am I? I am the sum of everything that has happened to me, I am my environment, I am a million different people and I choose the best one for each purpose, will I ever know myself, no, probably not, but maybe the journey is in the finding, hey look, I never knew I had a saw in there, I can cut wood, I never knew that...........
     
  11. Sikhilove

    Sikhilove United Kingdom
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    Work is seva, when we work, we vibrate at a higher frequency- yes we work and get paid but in the grand scheme of things, we don't get paid alot considering on other realms we can fly at will and obtain all the gold we want.

    I would say that you are disciplined Harry, compared to the guy who claims benefits and wakes up at 12pm, and watches tv all day, you're doing pretty well, waking up at 5am and working until 10-11pm is incomprehensible for alot of people I would imagine.

    I wonder if you could possibly cut down your work time and use the evening to visit the gym, even if just for a cardio workout and then meditation.

    Enjoyment of life is why we were born in the west, so hopefully you enjoy your life, meet up with friends when you can, find good sangat to be with and appreciate what we have here, and how fortunate we are not to have been born in a third world country.

    Dark people are what makes the Kalyug- the more positivity, seeing good in even the bad, because its all just as God has willed it to be, is key to being in chardi kala, and bringing on the Satyug- seeing God in everything and everyone.
     
  12. Harry Haller

    Harry Haller United Kingdom
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    Strange statement, I do not wish to fly at will, and gold has no interest for me.

    I am not particularly disciplined, I do it because I wish to, I think anyone who does anything they do not wish to do must be a bit odd, I believe they call this discipline. Its not so bad, all the canned rice pudding you can eat and as much 80's pop as you can stomach.

    but I do not wish to, I would have to force myself.

    I do not think enjoyment of life is limited to the west, people in the west have more money, but money does not guarantee enjoyment, I do not enjoy life particularly, I have periods of ecstasy and periods of darkness, its what keeps me sane..

    there's more to life than enjoying it, some might say life is a puzzle that you can enjoy doing, that works, provided you do not lose sight of the puzzle.
    don't have any, I have enough friends in my head, enough for a very large party.
    What do we have here?
    would not bother me in the slightest, if anything, there is more innocence in these countries, although as time goes on, such is seen as eccentric and strange.
    which dark people are you referring to? the ones that look like dark people or the ones that look normal and act darkly?
     
  13. Sikhilove

    Sikhilove United Kingdom
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    Some people enjoy discipline, it's what keeps us grounded and more able to cope with lifes challenges.

    you don't particularly enjoy life, fair enough, but in the west, money makes us more relaxed than other less fortunate countries and so people are more able to enjoy their lives here. Enjoyment is of course, a choice.

    And yes there is more to life than enjoying it, there are lessons in most things, but appreciating what we have is part of sikhi. Obviously we will also have dukh at times, but for now, the west is relatively in a period of peace.

    When war, famine etc kick in as it has a habit of doing every few generations, we will learn new lessons.

    Lol if you dont have friends, that also fine, I went through a phase where I basically had one.

    In a third world country, we have more chance of starvation, hunger, poverty etc. We are fortunate, there is no doubting that.

    Im speaking about souls who gravitate more towards negative thoughts and actions than positive.

    The world is mostly of a negative mindset at present, which is why it is Kalyug. It needs more positivity to get back to the balance.
     
  14. Harry Haller

    Harry Haller United Kingdom
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    I note you have a link between having money and enjoying life, how strange, money does not buy happiness, just a better class of misery.

    Sukh Dukh, its all the same to me, Sukh is nice, Dukh is just a break before the next bit of Sukh!
    War and famine are all around us, do you think they are god given or humankind given?
    I just prefer my own company

    Does Sikhism accept the notion of Kalyug?
     
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  15. chazSingh

    chazSingh Ireland
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    Harry Ji,

    Whilst i like reading your posts....sometimes i can;t understand some of your comments...

    you find it strange that the other member has given times for his work life, gym etc...and then in the same sentence you go ahead and give times for your general day to day activities...?

    what gives?
     
  16. chazSingh

    chazSingh Ireland
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    i would say that it does...
    what do you think? have you seen it referenced by our Guru's anywhere?
     
  17. Admin Singh

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    Good discussion here: Kalyug
     
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  18. Sikhilove

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    Yes, one can have all of the money in the world and still be unhappy- happiness is a choice. Desire and being discontent makes us unappreciative of what we already have.

    But the truth really is that there is temporal bliss (sukh), dukh and eternal bliss.

    Experiencing dukh and sukh and detaching from them is the key-they're there to be experienced.

    The only real bliss though is eternal bliss, dukh and sukh are just two parts of the whole- the balance. When you see both as one, God in every action, your mindset is an evolved one, and essentially you are free from the illusion.

    We have free will, but that having been said, everything is karma and is deserved. Therefore if someone hurts you, you deserve it- wars are deserved, All is God dressed up in this khel.

    We reap what we sow and everything happens for a reason, everything really is fair and is in perfect balance. You may pay off karams from another janam or soley from this birth, He knows the score.

    But we can help and serve and give and this is our choice- more goodness, love, teaching and respect is what is needed. The Satyug comes after Kalyug and to get there, we need to up our game.

    The Gurus speak of Kalyug quite abit- Maybe look at this link for abit of gyan about it:

    Kalyug - SikhiWiki, free Sikh encyclopedia.
     
  19. Harry Haller

    Harry Haller United Kingdom
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    my point i
    The point I was trying to make is that there is no set time to do anything, work, think, meditate, do good, can all be part of LIFE rather than ticking boxes. The times I have given are for the readers benefit
     
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  20. Harry Haller

    Harry Haller United Kingdom
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    Is happiness a choice? Could I choose to be happy? I don't think so, not after what I have seen, the thin veneer of reality has ripped and I can see elements of truth, happiness does not really come into it,
    well I am sorry I do not believe you, bliss for eternity would stop being bliss, after so much bliss, you would probably be desperate for the smell of a dogshit, just so you could stop being so blissful for a while, do anything for long enough and you will be sick of it, that includes bliss.

    and then what? what do you do then?

    Rubbish, we are now starting to go down a very familiar Vedic route, so the disabled deserved it? a child born with no arms deserved it? The next time someone bombs an airplane, they deserved it? all of them? does god have certain planes for sinners? so we are nothing more than puppets on a string either reaping rewards or suffering, all because of karma?

    Guru Nanakji fought hard to rid Sikhism of this, where is the logic in suffering for something you have no memory of, no recollection of, and you do not even get a court to defend yourself, how enlightened!

    for the sole reason of getting a better life next time? so we can go to Satyug? is it like going to disneyworld? How do we up our game? give more? love more? respect more? what about wisdom?, what about logic? what about learning about life, perception, what about this life? makes no sense to me...
     
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  21. Sikhilove

    Sikhilove United Kingdom
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    Your second statement is true, which is why dukh and sukh are there to be experienced, but then detached from. Our purpose is to live, discover, detach and teach others Truth detachment aswell.

    The Gurus lived their higher purpose, they discovered who they are, and shared their discovery with humanity.

    Gurbani teaches us that we reap what we sow, hence, as harsh as it may sound, if you have dukhi, you deserve it.

    Satyug isn't our resting place, neither should we become complacent should we reach Sachkandh.

    His Creation is endless, and therefore the discoveries and also seva is endless even if we reach Sachkandh consciousness..

    Don't use so much logic, listen to your heart, and just Be in contentment. Meditate in contentment and consult your heart (God) and you'll know what to do.
     
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    #20 Sikhilove, May 21, 2016
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