Peer pressure, western traits and relationships

Randip Singh · #11 (**permalink**) 24-Aug-2010, 23:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Harvir007

Well im living in a country who's culture is so very different to the 'punjabi' culture. Im bound to do what my friends do right? It is human nature but I mean through the course of 4 years 10-14 I learnt quite a bit, about religion and what science has against it. I even questioned whether there was a god. But I have realised that there is a god and that the sikh view that god can be non-anthropomorphic satisfied my curiosity. But I have people asking questions about my religion and also saying that there is no such thing as god, but if you don't what god is then you cannot say he doesn't exist right?

I also cut my hair when I was 10 and regret that everyday of my life, but at the time my mum and dad were to foolish to educate me on the guru's teachings so here comes into play a brilliant piece of technology: the internet. what one page told me in 5 minutes isn't what they told me in 10 years.

Now onto peer pressure, I as a young lad who is brought up in society that has no holds barred is extremely difficult, as I am 'different' but that doesn't stop friends asking me if I want to drink cause I know that one sip of alcohol and a madman enters the mind. But whose to explain to these ignorant people that what you found out now, our guru's found out 400+ years earlier. Most the time most of my friends are acceptant of the fact that we are born into a multi-cultural society and there are bound to be different things you do, so other than that why does the tiny minority have to pick on people that have a different belief to you? Freedom of speech my ****.

Western traits? 'Lets go for a beer mate, and knock someone up whilst we're at it' 'Let's get divorced 5 times' 'Lets not clean ourselves' Well yeah you know what im on about. But it is quite hard to tell a gora that they are wrong because they end up calling you a '****', sorry didn't catch that? I WAS BORN HERE! some white people are alright, others are just outright nut cases I mean we are humans you're distinguishing between people from somewhere where it is hot and somewhere where it is cold. Try to understand that we are all equal.

Relationships, my favourite. So 14, bit of a ladies (young) man and a conversationlist. Should/can I take a girl out on a date? I also know that a sikh should marry a sikh and I understand that but my mums like 'Finish studies, get a girl when you have a good job' blah blah everyday and im wondering: when guru says caste shouldn't be an issue, im saying why mum, do you say 'jatt only'? Shes also very superstitous, I frequently make fun of her mimicing her about stuff she says. My dad is like super strict: holding his head high and cares about his precious ''izzut'' Hate my dad, complete D*ck head. Do this do that!

So my ultimate question is, what can I do to better obtain knowledge about Sikhi?

Well Sikhism, is definitely not all about long hair. I could tell you stories about my youth with a turban and hair, that would raise a few eyebrows here.

They way I see it is Sikhism is a guide to the human condition, i.e. what makes us start to behave like animals rather than humans.

The answer to the this is when we become seduced by the 5 thieves. This is a pretty universal concept. Understand that and the human condition and then begin to understand Sikhism.

sukhjinderpalsingh · #12 (**permalink**) 28-Aug-2010, 22:46 PM

waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh

My dear i m very happy to know that a love in u for guru granth saheb took place thorugh internet i feel very proud on this as its a very big achievement for u that u didnt take knowledge from anywhere while u own searched about it

my dear as u wrote that science is against it then i want to tell u one thing that its not true my dear ok i give u one example in america at california there is a very world famous library where there is sacred religious books of every religion.and every religion book is kept in different boxes excluding "GURU GRANTH SAHEB" as it is adorned on bed so respectfully with lighting as it is very much honored by their professors and why is it kept???
Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/sikh-youth/31953-peer-pressure-western-traits-and-relationships.html

then dear the reason is that after a lot of study briefly of every holy book of different religion it is concluded that "guru granth saheb" got candid on every discovery by scientist(nasa scientist) even the nasa scientists fully agree with guru granth saheb and as far as those people are concerned who ask u to drink then dear be like a lotus dear which looks so dfferent and very beautiful as the world around u is like bog and u r like a lotus ya u may look so different but very charming and blessed and loved by guru (GOD)
Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=31953
and for more knowledge about guru granth saheb please go though translation by professor saheb singh of guru granth saheb ji!!!

Please reply soon!!!!

CaramelChocolate · #13 (**permalink**) 09-Sep-2010, 16:51 PM

Dear Harvir,
I felt compelled to reply and give my input, althought I rarely use this forum nowadays.
I am from the UK, and what you would call a GORA. I find it highly irresponsible when people blame western culture for the faults in their own society. Let me tell you that plenty of white people are not too pleased with the way society is going either. I come from a non-religious family, my parents have still some fairly traditional values when it comes to, for example, sex.
Your post seems to reveal an identity crisis. I can understand that. I think a LOT of people are confused about identity in Britain, including whites (and that is why groups like the BNP are rising among the white uneducated classes). But let me correct you on something here, it seems you think Punjabi culture = Sikh values. I am not here to denegrate anyone - in fact I am very vocal about the ills in white British society, but you know this is not the case. The vast majority of Punjabi Sikhs drink alcohol (or are white people to blame for that?), including sardars. Amrit and long hair are worthless without constantly striving to become one with Waheguru and become a better person, I even have stories of Amritdhari people that would shock you. After all, Amrit is just water, a true Amritdhari constantly strives to better themselves. Look at the context in which the later Gurus lived, they fought against Islamic Mughal oppression rather than converting and becoming like them. WHERE HAS THIS SPIRIT GONE? I rarely see this TRUE Sikh spirit, fighting against oppression, be it social or otherwise.

Something you should understand about being a minority, and this even goes for places like India, where Sikhs are also minority! It is natural that people will have preconceptions about you. There are very few people in all communities (your preconception of white people comes to mind) who actually look at outsiders for the person they are. However this is what the Gurus taught - judge a person by how they live and treat others, not from the people they are surrounded by. Do you expect others not to generalise you when you yourself are doing such? Follow the true Sikh spirit and make that change, and you may even find that your Sikh values are at odds with Punjabi culture.

Our beloved Gurus urged us to live in the world. This makes us stronger in our values and helps us to better society where we can. We are living in a society where it is much easier to express our disconnection with religion, and therefore there is currently a LARGE secular - religious rift in all communities.

It sounds to me as if your friends are uneducated. Or are they just curious? May be offer to take them to the Gurdwara if they have questions, offer them some literature. Explain that you are still a learner, and that LEARNING is a large part of being a Sikh.

Furthermore on the concept of God - the Guru Granth Sahib has a monistic message (not monotheistic). It says God is one, and that God has hundreds of thousands of feet, yet he has none. There is nothing that isn't God, and God has no limits. If we give God limits, then he can be equal to a few hundred men, and is therefore no longer god (just a deity with limitations). Maya (illusion) makes us believe that we are separate from God, yet it is the aim of life to realise that this maya is a part of God, and things are truely connected. So God does not have to be proven according to this theory, since God, by definition exists. It is therefore a question of accepting this definition, and maya is the element which stops this process. Waheguru simran is the Guru given tool to help us remember that we are truly one with Waheguru, through this veil of maya.
Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=31953
Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=31953

From a gora - CaramelChocolate

rangesingh:

BazGrewal · #14 (**permalink**) 18-Sep-2010, 09:24 AM

Hey Harvir007,

I am about the same age as you, and understand what you are going through. I know how you feel about your parents, I feel mine are the same way sometimes. I like how you are trying to look for more information, that will be helpful in answering your questions.