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28-Jan-2011, 08:05 AM
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| | | | | Re: Why Don't Sikh Girls Want To Marry Sikh Guys? Solution! Quote:
Originally Posted by Mai Harinder Kaur Not to defend the custom, which I think is idiotic, never-married Sikhs are often, even usually referred to as "boys"  and "girls"  whatever their age. I guess that sort of emphasises that, unlike Hindus, Sikhs believe that married life, not brahmacharya is the proper state for an adult.
I still think it's both stupid and insulting; I'm just explaining where it comes from. | I understand that Mai ji - Italian Americans have done the same for centuries. Once one realizes the implications, one changes language. Then when language changes, culture is influenced to change with it ----gradually. Ergo, speak up!
Do share your immediate thoughts or reactions on this issue? We value your views! Login Now! or Sign Up Today! to share your views with us.. Gurfateh! | | The following members appreciate spnadmin Ji for the above message. | | 
28-Jan-2011, 17:43 PM
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| | | | | Re: Why Don't Sikh Girls Want To Marry Sikh Guys? Solution! Quote:
Originally Posted by Mai Harinder Kaur I guess that sort of emphasises that, unlike Hindus, Sikhs believe that married life, not brahmacharya is the proper state for an adult. | But at what cost? Marriage involves compromise and sacrifice (which should be on both sides not just one) but to sacrifice who you are? Is it more important to be married at the cost of your beliefs or true to your beliefs at the cost of being married? I guess this question applies to both singhs and kaurs? Quote: |
I still think it's both stupid and insulting; I'm just explaining where it comes from.
| Unmarried women (not men) are very much looked down upon and not considered to be capable in Indian society from my experience. When a woman is getting more respect as an individual from other people, I can understand the attraction to moving away from Indian society, be that marriage or otherwise. | | The following members appreciate findingmyway Ji for the above message. | | 
29-Jan-2011, 01:01 AM
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| | | | | Re: Why Don't Sikh Girls Want To Marry Sikh Guys? Solution! This is just one more way we need to overcome the Punjabi patriarchy.
I do not hold with the idea that everyone needs to be married. Some are just not cut out to go through life with a life's companion and some never find someone they want to go through life with. Certainly some men (and a few women) who are abusive should never marry. I do hold, however, that the unmarried should remain chaste under Sikh teachings. Certainly a Khalsa must or s/he loses Amrit and is longer a Khalsa. Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/sikh-youth/22130-why-dont-sikh-girls-want-marry.html
It is also hard on Sikh men to be unmarried I know one Singh in his 40s who has never married and he is looked upon with suspicion and disdain. This is, of course, Punjabi society and not Indian society in general. I think a warning is in order here: With the way we continue to kill our girls, there are going to be many more unmarried Singhs than there were in the past.  I repeat that I know several Amritdhari Sikh WOMEN   who are looking for  good, strong Amritdhari men who are looking for  good, strong Amritdhari women. I think this problem is logistical. | | The following members appreciate Mai Harinder Kaur Ji for the above message. | | 
29-Jan-2011, 10:03 AM
|  | Sawa lakh se EK larraoan | | | Enrolled: Jul 4th, 2004 Location: KUALA LUMPUR MALAYSIA Age: 63
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| | | | | Re: Why Don't Sikh Girls Want To Marry Sikh Guys? Solution! and i know of one absolutley perfect amritdharee woman who found an absolutely perfect amrtidharee man..BUT they broke up..TWO "perfects" are like the SAME POLE ?? North Pole will NEVER attract a NORTH POLE...Law of Nature.. | | The following members appreciate Gyani Jarnail Singh Ji for the above message. | | 
29-Jan-2011, 10:33 AM
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| | | | | Re: Why Don't Sikh Girls Want To Marry Sikh Guys? Solution! A marriage is like running a company with 2 equal partners as 2 equal CEO's. Both men and women have to understand it. Let me rephrase it, especially the men who have reigned this world in a partriachial manner from the time immemorial, should allow women to be their equal partners.
I was telling Harsimran, my wife for almost 22 years on the other day that if I were to marry her again, I would want her to walk by my side rather than behind me during lavans. Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=22130Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=22130
But in my real life, she has trained me to walk behind her. The latter is for discussion on some other day and as a new topic.
Tejwant Singh | | The following members appreciate Tejwant Singh Ji for the above message. | | 
29-Jan-2011, 11:15 AM
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| | | | | Re: Why Don't Sikh Girls Want To Marry Sikh Guys? Solution! Quote:
Originally Posted by Tejwant Singh A marriage is like running a company with 2 equal partners as 2 equal CEO's. Both men and women have to understand it. Let me rephrase it, especially the men who have reigned this world in a partriachial manner from the time immemorial, should allow women to be their equal partners.
I was telling Harsimran, my wife for almost 22 years on the other day that if I were to marry her again, I would want her to walk by my side rather than behind me during lavans.
But in my real life, she has trained me to walk behind her. The latter is for discussion on some other day and as a new topic.
Tejwant Singh | My Dad was something of a curmudgeon who never did accept the SRM ("Damned British stuff!" (only he didn't say "stuff")). At our anand karaj, we split the lavans. I led two and Mani led two. There were a few grumbles, but to be perfectly honest, I think people were more upset that I refused to wear make-up, though.
Welcome back, Tejwant ji.
Last edited by Mai Harinder Kaur; 29-Jan-2011 at 11:16 AM.
Reason: Forgot to say something.
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30-Jan-2011, 00:09 AM
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| | | | | I saw the thread on girl not liking Sikh boys is back alive I would just like to say that although I myself am not looking right now since I am very busy, one thing that you should not do is dwell on this thought that girls dont like proper Sikh boys because for every example that you can show that a girl does not like a sikh boy there is an example whwere a sikh girl does like a sikh boy Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=22130
Dont think that oh if a girl likes boys with cut hair that if you had cut heair too that she would like you..... dont be fooled there is more in the selction process than just having cut hair. Even cut hair guys get rejected
I will say one thing though, you need to create an edge for yourself..... and even pretty boy singhs only goes so far........ as looks are just the first bit of attraction but when that part is over then it comes down to money, you ethics atc atc
To tell you the truth, money is power and you need and this is a pretty good edge to have Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=22130
Also, you need luck on your side, not every woman you like will like you back so therefore you have to meet up with women and then hopefully you can find a match
Dont let the internet get you down on certain topics because at the end of the day when you see things in "real life" then they are not that bad as people write
One persons problem may not be your problem, so dont look at other peoples failing and make them your own, losing before you even have started
Good luck | 
30-Jan-2011, 00:12 AM
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| | | | | Why do some girls say that they want a Ramgaria boy or a Punjabi hindu only? Why do some girls sya that they want a Ramgaria boy or a Punjabi hindu only?
What is the link with punjabi hindu's being more accesptable than people in your own fold, Jatt, Khats etc etc | 
30-Jan-2011, 00:41 AM
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| | | | | Re: Why Don't Sikh Girls Want To Marry Sikh Guys? Solution! badshah ji Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=22130
You say that you are busy. Why then are you spamming this forum with threads on the marriage preferences of Sikh "girls?"
I have merged the thread "I saw the the thread on girl not liking Sikh boys is back live" with this thread. It always was "live." I also merged a thread on Sikh women, not "girls" (thank you), on the look-out for Ramgarhia and Hindu mates. There are already enough threads on this question. Please put future comments on the subject of Sikh marriage preferences on existing threads, or action will be taken. spnadmin | 
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