Is It A Sin For A Sikh To Marry A Non-Sikh?

amarsanghera · #**131** (**permalink**) 23-03-2008, 01:21 PM

<<"It looks pretty strange when we see a Gursikh man with a wife having trimmed hair and wearing short clothes. Is it not shameful on our part if we cannot influence our life partner to follow the tenets of Sikhism" >>

this statement KDS ji, specially the words - shameful, influence

we have had a long debate over this stuff

i don't think the topic deserves another debate.

kds1980 · #**132** (**permalink**) 23-03-2008, 01:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by amarsanghera

<<"It looks pretty strange when we see a Gursikh man with a wife having trimmed hair and wearing short clothes. Is it not shameful on our part if we cannot influence our life partner to follow the tenets of Sikhism" >>

this statement KDS ji, specially the words - shameful, influence

we have had a long debate over this stuff

i don't think the topic deserves another debate.

But still I don't understand what type of male ego you have seen in that cartoon.

amarsanghera · #**133** (**permalink**) 23-03-2008, 01:42 PM

i am sorry KDS ji

i can't explain any better

the statement seems to make an egoistic statement that as a "Sikh" man, your wife should follow your tenets, coz other wise its so "shameful" for you <hidden message - manhood>

i just felt it this way, it is not necessary for everyone to feel the same.

not everyone responds toa joke the same way.

so i don't think there is anything to be debated. i just stated my "opinion"

aad0002 · #**134** (**permalink**) 23-03-2008, 07:44 PM

amarsanghera ji

I read it the same way you did. The only way the cartoon reads in my mind is that she is riding on his scooter (horse, camel, chariot). So in theory he would have asked her to hop on. He chose her -- and the cartoon is suggesting that he has bad judgment. Reason?

Accordng to rehat a man must make every effort to have his wife baptized -- which always puzzled me because women themselves can make that decision for themselves. The rehat goes back to the early 20th Century when men made these decisions for women, but the cartoon is in modern times.

It is taking too long to get to the point. The "joke" is that he didn't do his duty, or won't do his duty" therefore Shame, Shame, Shame. Leaving the woman's decisions off the radar screen so to speak.

carolineislands · #**135** (**permalink**) 23-03-2008, 11:46 PM

I thought that maybe the imagery was a little sexist in that the man was typically covered up and the woman in short skirt, tight shirt and makeup. Would we have laughed if the roles were reversed -- woman in salwar kameez, hair covered with dastar and chunni, driving in front and the man in tights shorts with a skin tight t-shirt and hair cut?

amarsanghera · #**136** (**permalink**) 24-03-2008, 02:47 AM

<<Accordng to rehat a man must make every effort to have his wife baptized -- which always puzzled me because women themselves can make that decision for themselves. The rehat goes back to the early 20th Century when men made these decisions for women, but the cartoon is in modern times.>>

this is exactly why i take the rehat with a pinch of salt. why follow anything which doesn't even stand the tests of changing times.

aad0002 · #**137** (**permalink**) 24-03-2008, 10:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carolineislands

I thought that maybe the imagery was a little sexist in that the man was typically covered up and the woman in short skirt, tight shirt and makeup. Would we have laughed if the roles were reversed -- woman in salwar kameez, hair covered with dastar and chunni, driving in front and the man in tights shorts with a skin tight t-shirt and hair cut?

That too!

singhbj · #**138** (**permalink**) 24-03-2008, 03:32 PM

Waheguru ji ka khalsa
Waheguru ji ki fateh

The cartoon of a Singh riding a scooter while his wife is the pillion rider shows how most of the society feels about a Sikh marrying a non-Sikh.

Indian Sikh society, especially in Punjab are very conservative in terms of marriage. They don't even marry outside their caste leave aside religion. Yes, the society at large is sexist & has double standards.

For example if the girl in picture was his girl friend or lover than it is looked upon as an achievement but not as his wife. On the other hand it is unimaginable to think that a Sikh girl is riding with a non-Sikh leave aside coming across one in Punjab. If such a case is discovered by someone in the family or relative or community or village that means disaster !

One can only encounter a Sikh (Bhekhi or Fake) marrying a non-Sikh when the person & family is gaining something like foreign visa, citizenship, money, property, status etc

Sardar (ones keeping hair but not following Gurmat) and ones born in a Sikh family but not following Gurmat, don't mind getting married to a non-Sikh.
No Gursikh will give into Kaam (lust) or Moh (emotional attachment) to choose a non-Sikh for marriage unless he or she is not a Gursikh to begin with !

Most of the readers of foreign origin will find all this funny or hard to believe but that is how it is !

As for being sexist society, why do you think that birth ratio of girls is very low in Indian or Punjabi society compared to boys ?

Lastly it is vital to find a compatible match having the same spiritual level of understanding in regards to religion for marriage.

Waheguru ji ka khalsa
Waheguru ji ki fateh

aad0002 · #**139** (**permalink**) 24-03-2008, 08:22 PM

I am mystified. That is all. Still hold you in high regard Singhbj.

Quote:

Originally Posted by singhbj

Waheguru ji ka khalsa
Waheguru ji ki fateh

The cartoon of a Singh riding a scooter while his wife is the pillion rider shows how most of the society feels about a Sikh marrying a non-Sikh.

How do you know how Most of Society feels about anything?

Indian Sikh society, especially in Punjab are very conservative in terms of marriage. They don't even marry outside their caste leave aside religion. Yes, the society at large is sexist & has double standards.

Your observation may be true -- I don't know -- and would need to see some data to check things out. But that doesn't matter in the discussion. The cartoon's lack of humor is what we were taking a look at in the last several posts. Three women didn't think it was funny. One of them lives in India.

For example if the girl in picture was his girl friend or lover than it is looked upon as an achievement but not as his wife. That's not nice. I hope that view is not prevalent. If it is we have a couple of s working at large.

On the other hand it is unimaginable to think that a Sikh girl is riding with a non-Sikh leave aside coming across one in Punjab. If such a case is discovered by someone in the family or relative or community or village that means disaster. Your comment reinforces the idea that the cartoon promotes a sexist view. When I said male-centric I was trying to be polite. Maybe that was a mistake.

One can only encounter a Sikh (Bhekhi or Fake) marrying a non-Sikh when the person & family is gaining something like foreign visa, citizenship, money, property, status etc
Always?

Sardar (ones keeping hair but not following Gurmat) and ones born in a Sikh family but not following Gurmat, don't mind getting married to a non-Sikh.
No Gursikh will give into Kaam (lust) or Moh (emotional attachment) to choose a non-Sikh for marriage unless he or she is not a Gursikh to begin with ! Are Kaam and Moh 2 of 5 s? Is marrying a nonSikh the 6th that we didn't hear about until now? Do you think I should get a divorce then?

Most of the readers of foreign origin will find all this funny or hard to believe but that is how it is !

I find this neither funny nor hard to believe.

As for being sexist society, why do you think that birth ratio of girls is very low in Indian or Punjabi society compared to boys ? I think many Sikhs of Indian origin and in Indian society are very upset by this and are working to see to it that policies and laws are enforced by the government that prohibit female foeticide.

Lastly it is vital to find a compatible match having the same spiritual level of understanding in regards to religion for marriage. No argument with this statement -- but spiritual level of understanding is not limited to Sikhs.

Waheguru ji ka khalsa
Waheguru ji ki fateh

Hope I am not sounding cranky. I don't want to sound cranky. It is a concern to me that Sikhs define the thoughts, motivations, spirituality of all other Sikhs from a single point of view. It just is not so.

amarsanghera · #**140** (**permalink**) 24-03-2008, 10:16 PM

<<The cartoon of a Singh riding a scooter while his wife is the pillion rider shows how most of the society feels about a Sikh marrying a non-Sikh.

Indian Sikh society, especially in Punjab are very conservative in terms of marriage. They don't even marry outside their caste leave aside religion. Yes, the society at large is sexist & has double standards. >>

the cartoon tries to depict the small Sikh child as the voice of "Sikh"

i find it shameful that the voice of "Sikh" mirros that of a sexist society.

<<For example if the girl in picture was his girl friend or lover than it is looked upon as an achievement but not as his wife. On the other hand it is unimaginable to think that a Sikh girl is riding with a non-Sikh leave aside coming across one in Punjab. If such a case is discovered by someone in the family or relative or community or village that means disaster !>>>

i don't know which part of punjab you live in, times are changing.

<<Sardar (ones keeping hair but not following Gurmat) and ones born in a Sikh family but not following Gurmat, don't mind getting married to a non-Sikh.
No Gursikh will give into Kaam (lust) or Moh (emotional attachment) to choose a non-Sikh for marriage unless he or she is not a Gursikh to begin with !
>>>

how can you be sure that Sikh women are not sexually attractive to the Gursikhs ( illiciting Kaam)

so you mean that having feelings(kaam) for a gursikh woman/man is okay?

its a revelation!!!

<<Most of the readers of foreign origin will find all this funny or hard to believe but that is how it is ! >>

i am not of foreign( i don't know what it means) origin, but i found the cartoon in bad taste.

<<Lastly it is vital to find a compatible match having the same spiritual level of understanding in regards to religion for marriage.>>

spiritual awakening has no linkage with the path.
all paths lead to same One.