
04-Apr-2010, 03:12 AM
|  | | | | Enrolled: Apr 4th, 2010
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| | | | | | Is it compulsory for a amritdhari Singh to marry an amritdhari Kaur? Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh, Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/sikh-sikhi-sikhism/29819-compulsory-amritdhari-singh-marry-amritdhari-kaur.html
I want to ask a question. Is it mandatory for a Amritdhari singh to marry a Amritdhari gal? or Can he marry to any sikh girl.
What does rehat maryada says about it? Please let me know the answer.
Thanks in advance.
Gur Fateh *
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04-Apr-2010, 04:29 AM
|  | | | | Enrolled: Oct 6th, 2006 Location: British Columbia, Canada Age: 60
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| | | | | re: Is it compulsory for a amritdhari Singh to marry an amritdhari Kaur? First, I find "sikh gal" offensive. Since you use "singh" for the male, please use "kaur" for the female. Better yet would be "Singh" and "Kaur."
According to the SRM (Sikh Rehat Maryada)... Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=29819
" q. A baptised ought to get his wife also baptised.."
That is all the SRM says. Make whatever you can of that.  Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=29819 | | The following members appreciate Mai Harinder Kaur Ji for the above message. | | 
04-Apr-2010, 06:26 AM
|  | Sawa lakh se EK larraoan | | | Enrolled: Jul 4th, 2004 Location: KUALA LUMPUR MALAYSIA Age: 63
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| | | | | re: Is it compulsory for a amritdhari Singh to marry an amritdhari Kaur? at the Anand Karaj the Granthi used to ask the Bride/Groom whether they were both amritdharee (Guru walleh) or NOT..and if not..then to get into the Guruwalleh Brotherhood asap. Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=29819
Now a days at Majority of Anand karajs I attended..the Granthi SKIPS this..simply because he can clearly see that the Groom must have visited the barber ( shiny new chin raggrrree hoee). regardeless of the FACT that he is carrying a THREE FOOT SWORD to hsow his "Khalsahood credentials" ???.during those days long gone when my dad was granthi..he would SKIP the Anand Karaj when he saw such a groom....how times have changed...
Some Granthis just mumble through the advice ( sometimes he gets into toruble with the family if he lays too much stress on kesh amrit etc as the famaily feels he is specially targettign their son !! Some Gurdwars parbhnadaks have "unoffically banned" granthis form talking about such topics..no kesh, amrit etc even during girpurabs/vasakhi..just a general talk on battle of anandpur etc etc to entertain the crowd...and not offend the ghonas monas etc.
The SRM is actually on the BACKBURNER for MOST SIKHS..all "jathebandis" have their own Maryadas....so they keep MUM when SRM "HUKMNAMAH from AKAL TAKHAT" is raised..BUT bring out sotas and daangs when its time to ..."enforce the Prof Darshan Singh Ji Khalsaarshan Singh hukmnamah form the VERY SAME AKAL TAKHAT !!???? is it the same akal takhat ?? then why we have double VISION ??
BOTTOM LINE...its definitley in your favour if BOTH Bride/Groom are of the SAME RELIGION..Sikh..Amritdharee..Taksali..AKJ..whateve r...differences lead to..more differences..later !! CHOOSE WISELY for a good long happy marriage...:veryhappymunda1: | | The following members appreciate Gyani Jarnail Singh Ji for the above message. | | 
04-Apr-2010, 07:19 AM
|  | SPN Sewadaar | | | Enrolled: Dec 3rd, 2006 Location: Chester PA
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| | | | | re: Is it compulsory for a amritdhari Singh to marry an amritdhari Kaur? The Sikh Rehat Marayada states that a baptized Sikh man should get his wife baptized. This is all it says. But there is a lot more to it than a simple suggestion. Gyani is right about the number of creative ways that "khalsahood" is negotiated, or shall I say subverted. Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=29819Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=29819
Why is it not a simple suggestion? What are the real burdens and blessings of amrit sanchaar?
That should make for more interesting dialog. Anyway I hope that it does. | | The following member appreciates Narayanjot Kaur Ji for the above message. | | 
04-Apr-2010, 09:42 AM
|  | | | | Enrolled: Oct 6th, 2006 Location: British Columbia, Canada Age: 60
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| | | | | re: Is it compulsory for a amritdhari Singh to marry an amritdhari Kaur? I was just reading " Amritdhari: A Topic Looking for a Good Title" and thinking about commenting there.
I guess I'll comment here, though, as it's more current.
My opinion, not written in stone.
I can't see for the life of me why anyone not either Amritdhari or working toward it would want to be a Sikh. Becoming an aspiring Khalsa is really just a second step on this journey.
To begin with the 5 kakkars. I think anyone who doesn't look like a Sikh is missing a huge part of the Sikh experience. I would encourage women to tie turban partly for this reason. (There are others.) For 20 years, I threw my kakkars away, wanting to escape from being a Sikh. It didn't work, but it was a sad time of being apart.
I did not always hold this opinion. For several years after our marriage, Mani was Amritdhari and we both lived the Khalsa lifestyle, but I balked at taking this step. Only after I was blessed with Amrit did I understand that there is more to this whole Khalsa thing than living according to certain rules, including the study of Gurbani and Naam-jap and such. Our already strong marriage became even stronger and happier. Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=29819
I think the main burden of being an aspiring Khalsa are the militant nonAmritdhari Sikhs. I do not know what their problem is. Amrit is open to any Sikh willing to accept it. We are not an exclusive society. Any Sikh willing to live as a Khalsa is welcome. We are all learners. Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=29819
I'm tired. Perhaps I'll write more later. I have much more to say. | | The following members appreciate Mai Harinder Kaur Ji for the above message. | | 
04-Apr-2010, 13:29 PM
|  | | | | Enrolled: Feb 19th, 2007 Location: Delhi India Age: 63
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| | | | | re: Is it compulsory for a amritdhari Singh to marry an amritdhari Kaur? This has been discussed in another thread.
The only requirement of SRM is that for a Sikh to be recognised as an Amritdhari is that both the spouses should be amritdharis and if an amritdhari marries a non amritdhari (which is not forbidden) then both should take amrit together to re enter the fold of Amritdharis. | | The following members appreciate harbansj24 Ji for the above message. | | 
05-Apr-2010, 10:30 AM
|  | | | | Enrolled: Jul 1st, 2009
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| | | | | re: Is it compulsory for a amritdhari Singh to marry an amritdhari Kaur? Quote:
Originally Posted by Gyani Jarnail Singh The SRM is actually on the BACKBURNER for MOST SIKHS..all "jathebandis" have their own Maryadas....so they keep MUM when SRM "HUKMNAMAH from AKAL TAKHAT" is raised..BUT bring out sotas and daangs when its time to ..."enforce the Prof Darshan Singh Ji Khalsaarshan Singh hukmnamah form the VERY SAME AKAL TAKHAT !!???? is it the same akal takhat ?? then why we have double VISION ??
| I think most jathebandis/groups etc. do not think SRM is endorsed by Akal Takht. They hold the opinion that SRM is SGPC which is not Akal Takht. | 
05-Apr-2010, 18:45 PM
|  | Sawa lakh se EK larraoan | | | Enrolled: Jul 4th, 2004 Location: KUALA LUMPUR MALAYSIA Age: 63
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| | | | | re: Is it compulsory for a amritdhari Singh to marry an amritdhari Kaur? Roab Ji...
I would say so too......BUT...............the Recent Murder of the Nanaksahi Calendar was passed to the "SGPC".....( WHEN the FIVE Takhats couldnt agree on it)........and these SAME "jathebandis" wholeheartedly ACCEPT IT...as IF that was AKAL TAKHAT !!
SO Clearly all of them PICK and CHOOSE !!
1. Example..a Hukmanmah was passed by Ranjit Singh of Akal Takhat agaisnt an Editor of Punjabi daily... ....no one even talks about it and all these same "Jathebandis" are all Pally wally with this Comrade Nastik Editor who PUBLISHED the Sauda Saadh full page advert for RS 1 Lakh when even the Punjabi tribune refused to touch it with a 12 foot pole....YET these same "Jathebandis" are up in arms to enforce the AT Hukmanamah agaisnt Joginder singh of Spokesman Newspaper...In the previous case the Nastik comrade was powerful enough to get the AT Jathedar DISMISSED !! Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=29819Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=29819
Many many more such PICK and CHOOSE examples are available... | | The following members appreciate Gyani Jarnail Singh Ji for the above message. | | 
05-Apr-2010, 22:48 PM
|  | | | | Enrolled: Jun 30th, 2004 Location: Henderson, NV. Age: 58
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| | | | | re: Is it compulsory for a amritdhari Singh to marry an amritdhari Kaur? There should be an intensive 2 week course for the bride and the groom on Gurmat, Sikhi, Sikh History, understanding and how to live the meanings of Lavan etc, etc before they should get married. This should be the part of Rehat Maryada. If this is, then itwill motivate all to take khandei de pahul. This will also make them live and abide by the Gurmat Ideals. Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=29819Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=29819
Marriage is part of the inner growth that takes some time, many times years to mature, then only 'one jyot' appears.
But for the above to happen, we need education for the Granthis so that they can pass their Gurbani wisdom to the others. If not, then this kind of exercise is futile.
Tejwant Singh | | The following members appreciate Tejwant Singh Ji for the above message. | | 
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