Food for thought: Spousal Abuse

Soul_jyot · #1 (**permalink**) 06-Apr-2007, 21:36 PM

Spousal Abuse

Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/general-discussion/15233-food-for-thought-spousal-abuse.html
Author: Rebecca Bailey
Published: March 20, 2007

This article takes a look into the different types of abuse such as: physical, sexual, emotional, economic, financial, passive, and spiritual abuse.

Spousal abuse if defined as someone that is treated in a harmful, injurious or offensive way. It includes physical, sexual, emotional, economic, passive and spiritual abuse. Spousal abuse is not only aimed toward women. It is not easy to just get out of that situation. If you are experiencing abuse many times you are scared and dont always know how to get out. Lets take a look and see how they affect every day life, as well as how to get out.

Physical abuse- Physical abuse is common in society today. Studies show that not only women the victims, even though it is not heard of alot there are also men that are victims of an abusive wife. We don't hear much about men being abused because many do not report it because it is socially unacceptable. Physical abuse is abuse involving contact intended to cause pain or other physical harm. One of the main signs of physical abuse are bruises or cuts on the skin from some type of force often described by the victim as an accident.

Sexual abuse- Many intimate partners that are victims of sexual assault are often at risk of serious injury or death. Sexual harassment is to gain power over another person, this often leads into sexual assault by rape. Sexual exploitation is a power trip forcing someone to look at pornography or forcing them to participate in pornographic film making.

Emotional abuse- Emotional abuse can be both verbal and nonverbal. This abuse is often believed to be worse than even physical abuse because the scars deep rooted. It is also been proven to be more emotionally damaging than physical abuse. Victims of emotional abuse are threatened or intimidated into compliance or submission, have had their personal property or possessions destroyed, have witnessed violence toward animals. Victims become a posession and are isolated from family and friends, and are blamed for the way the abuser feels and their actions. Victims are made to feel worthless.

Economic or Financial abuse- Economic and financial abuse are part of the isolation process. The victim is often prevented from working or choosing an occupation. The abuser will often withhold money, credit cards, food, clothes, necessary medication, as well as shelter from the victim to force submission. Stealing from or defrauding the victim of money or assets and exploitation of resources for personal gain are also signs of economic or financial abuse.

Spiritual abuse- Spiritual abuse is the act of preventing the victim form practicing their religious or spiritual beliefs, as well as ridiculing them for these beliefs. Using these beliefs to manipulate the victim is another form of this abuse. You can also find that the abuser often forces the victim to raise their children in a religion or spiritual preference othr than the victims.

Now that you are aware of the types of abuse lets look at the signs that you or a friend could be in an abusive relationship:

Depression
Absences from work
Harassing phone calls while the victim is working
Fear of the partner
Decreased productivity
Isolation
Insufficient resources

You need to make yourself safe while you are in the house where this abuse takes place and plan to get out; keep a phone in a room that locks so if you are being abuse you and your children can go there to call for help. Also memorize emergency numbers. Avoid going into a kitchen or garage when trying to avoid an altercation as there are many weapons in these areas. Make up a code word so if you are on the phone with family or friends and an attack take place they can call for help if you are unable to. Keep in mind that without help the abuser will not get better. Make sure before you leave the situation you know what you need to take with you and have it close at hand. Some of these things include important documents, money, medication, credit cards, checkbook, and key to your home, and office as well as your childrens favorite toys or blankets. Places to find help are with the police and womens shelters.
Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=15233

Spousal Abuse

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poppy · #2 (**permalink**) 07-Apr-2007, 19:48 PM

There is of course nothing new about spousal or indeed domestic abuse where ever it may come from. It is usually a female who is abused, whether by an elder, a sibling or spouse. Lets not forget child abuse.
Reference:: Sikh Philosophy Network http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/showthread.php?t=15233

The tips of how to deal with it are extremely helpful. Let us all not forget, More shameful than 'exposing it' ( the usual reason for not exposing it in our family or extended family/community being the good name of the family and family honour) is tollerating it. Therefore it is more shameful to tollerate the about and not to challenging. It must be a principal of our faith that one must challenge oppression and stand up against injustice. Dont also forget such abuse takes place in all sorts of households, irrespective of how religious/wealthy/educated that family maybe. In fact such families are just better at hiding it.